My Plan To Blow Stuff Up.
Today I found my copy of The ZAFT Soldier’s Guide to Blowing Stuff Up and Generally Causing Mayhem for Those of You Who Only Joined the Military to Angst and/or for the Slash, and I believe that I have found the answer to the problem of the tentacle monster “harassing” other campers when that’s my job.
Chapter six covers “Molotov cocktails.” There’s a lot of talk about the history of the Molotov cocktail, but that was too long and talked too much about Russia and I don’t like Russia because boobies. But then they tell you how to make one! Now, I guess it’s lucky that I spent two weeks in the woods and in the cafeteria, because I know where to find most of the ingredients.
Bottles: the refuge pile at the end of camp. Someone on the staff likes their liquor. But mind-altering substances are bad for you! Don’t do drugs! Flammable liquid can be found in the kitchens - there’s some, erm, improperly stored zombie fruit sitting in one of the cabinets, and I have the whisky I grabbed from the lounge in the Boddy house. Also - Lu Xun? You have some of this stuff, right? Cloth rag: I’m sure I can steal someone’s pants, or use this ex-toga of Gaara’s.
Chapter eighteen covers “sieges,” which sounds kind of like “seizures” except not. It talks about burning people out!
So I’ve decided to apply this to the lake. First, we burn the tentacle monster in it out, just like smoking Bogey-One out of the debris belt, only with fire instead of really, really ridiculously big lasers. Considering how sludgey it is, it’s probably flammable, but we should probably add something that burns, just to be sure. If you’d like to donate your Soup of the Day, the effort would be much appreciated. Then when the tentacle monster comes out, we’ll throw the Molotov cocktails at it and it will go ‘splodey! And someone should probably be shooting at it, too, just in case it’s one of those tentacle monsters.
This would be a lot easier with a Gundam. Or with a Tannhauser. Or if I could point Genesis at the lake and blow up the camp and all the rest of the world. But no: we must proceed with the materials at hand to defend my camp mates, return them to a warm and loving world away from this fighting, and restore peace! Who’s with me?
For the slash ZAFT!
Chapter six covers “Molotov cocktails.” There’s a lot of talk about the history of the Molotov cocktail, but that was too long and talked too much about Russia and I don’t like Russia because boobies. But then they tell you how to make one! Now, I guess it’s lucky that I spent two weeks in the woods and in the cafeteria, because I know where to find most of the ingredients.
Bottles: the refuge pile at the end of camp. Someone on the staff likes their liquor. But mind-altering substances are bad for you! Don’t do drugs! Flammable liquid can be found in the kitchens - there’s some, erm, improperly stored zombie fruit sitting in one of the cabinets, and I have the whisky I grabbed from the lounge in the Boddy house. Also - Lu Xun? You have some of this stuff, right? Cloth rag: I’m sure I can steal someone’s pants, or use this ex-toga of Gaara’s.
Chapter eighteen covers “sieges,” which sounds kind of like “seizures” except not. It talks about burning people out!
So I’ve decided to apply this to the lake. First, we burn the tentacle monster in it out, just like smoking Bogey-One out of the debris belt, only with fire instead of really, really ridiculously big lasers. Considering how sludgey it is, it’s probably flammable, but we should probably add something that burns, just to be sure. If you’d like to donate your Soup of the Day, the effort would be much appreciated. Then when the tentacle monster comes out, we’ll throw the Molotov cocktails at it and it will go ‘splodey! And someone should probably be shooting at it, too, just in case it’s one of those tentacle monsters.
This would be a lot easier with a Gundam. Or with a Tannhauser. Or if I could point Genesis at the lake and blow up the camp and all the rest of the world. But no: we must proceed with the materials at hand to defend my camp mates, return them to a warm and loving world away from this fighting, and restore peace! Who’s with me?
For the slash ZAFT!