(Untitled)

[bitnotgoodyeah]

[hello. if you happen to be walking through the most happening place in camp, AKA its renowned center, you may note a man standing awkwardly by himself. he's wearing a heavy winter coat and, if you venture close enough, he'll glance your way and say with the tone of the longsuffering:]

... Pack of fags, anyone? Anyone got a... pack of fags?

((

Comments

[cheerleading]

Um, wow, that's offensive.

[bitnotgoodyeah]

[for once, his pause seems less out of personal pain and more out of... lack of words to say]

... Terribly sorry, love. I just can't help my nature.

[cheerleading]

Seriously? I'd expect that kind of language from like, meathead footballers, but you're really old, I can't believe you don't know better.

[bitnotgoodyeah]

[oh why are we taunting the American, surely this won't end well]

And aren't good little girls supposed to know better... than to not use condoms?

[cheerleading]

...Excuse me?

[bitnotgoodyeah]

[swallows]

Daddy... didn't like that one, did he?

[cheerleading]

What are you, some kind of perverted British stalker?

[bitnotgoodyeah]

[closes his eyes]

Looks like you found me out.

[cheerleading]

Are you even wearing anything under that coat? Gross-out.

[bitnotgoodyeah]

[grimaces]

Do you want to see?

[cheerleading]

What do you think? If you don't leave me alone I'll- um- okay, 9-1-1 isn't exactly effective here, but I know people with weird-ass super powers? And they will kick your ass back to England.

[bitnotgoodyeah]

Tell me more.

[cheerleading]

Right now I'm sincerely regretting using the last of my mace on those gorillas last August.

[bitnotgoodyeah]

Oh no.

Did I catch you at a bad time?

[takes an abortive step forward, then shakes his head fiercely and steps back]

[cheerleading]

Are you, like, mentally deficient? Is there ever a good time to be sexually harassed? Which is what you're doing, just so you know.