itp: exercises in tact

[goldstarring]

[just outside your mess hall today there are a girl and a boy singing this together in perfect, effortless harmony. Impressive!

And yet! It sounds like two girls singing. In fact, there's no male voice to be found. And as they finish the song, the girl looks somewhat perplexed.]

. . . pardon me, but are you sure you're a boy?

((Rachel is derping

Comments

[barfintomyhat]

Well!

[goldstarring]

Oh! Hello, Kurt.

[barfintomyhat]

Are you trying to replace me, Rachel? I won't stand for this.

[goldstarring]

Really. It's nothing like that! It's only practice. I haven't been doing nearly enough vocal exercise since I got here.

[barfintomyhat]

Like I'm going to believe that. And you just happen to schedule a vocal exercise, which involves a Wicked duet, with a male soprano, right after I get here?

[goldstarring]

I'm aware of the irony of this comment since I believe you've said it to me before, but the world doesn't actually revolve around you. And if you're this paranoid about being replaced, I suggest practicing more and making yourself irreplaceable.

[barfintomyhat]

[I'm soooo bitching out about this on my Facebook later. Prepare for a Kurt Rocks, Rachel Drools page later tonight.]

[deep breath] No. I'm not going to lower myself to your level. I will just let you know that I made a deal with another camper to help with her camp production of Chicago, as long as she helped to recruit for a camp Glee club. I was going to put in a good word for you -- but you can audition like everyone else.

[goldstarring]

As long as your audition process will be unbiased, I'll be happy to audition like everyone else. I'm perfectly confident of my talent.

[barfintomyhat]

Are you by any chance suggesting that previous audition processes have been biased? Because you did win the Wicked solo. Stop rubbing it in.

[goldstarring]

Contrary to your belief, I'm not actually that unkind. I was suggesting that since as we both know, you really aren't at all fond of me, if you were the one judging you would judge my personality and not my talent.

[barfintomyhat]

I believe I have told you in many occasions that your talent is fantastic, out of this world. The fact that I don't let your horrible personality cloud my judgement of your talent should be proof that I would be an objective judge.

[goldstarring]

If that's true, then I'll be happy to audition. Keep me informed.

... and, you know? While I can understand why you think I was being underhanded, this really wasn't meant as any kind of slight on you. Sometimes I just sing because ... you know, singing is fun.

[barfintomyhat]

Hm. Singing for fun? That doesn't sound like the Rachel I know at all.

Putting that aside for now, I need to know where you live. A very large tentacle monster wanted me to move in with him, and I told him I'd made plans with you previously to get out of it.

[goldstarring]

... well. I'm also interested in finding out who else here is musical, and music always attracts musical people --

-- a ... tentacle monster? Oh, I've been staying in temporary accomodation up until now, but I need to find something more permanent too. I believe there's a hotel somewhere that we might be able to get rooms in.

[barfintomyhat]

Say no more. Let me know if you find someone with potential. I don't want you to scare them away.

The two of us in a hotel room? On the one hand, I do need plenty of space for my clothes . . .

[goldstarring]

I think with a few ground rules we could make it work at a push. But if it comes to that, please do bear in mind that I have a very specific sleep schedule.