(Untitled)

[skinofalizard]

[in a VERY SECLUDED* area of camp, there is a lizard-teen studiously looking at a book.

Eventually, he sets the book down, takes a few steps away from it, and begins the monologue]

If music be the food of love, play on;
Give me excess of it, that surfeiting,
The appetite may sicken and so die...

[he's quite good, actually]

[*not nearly as

Comments

[ofsugarandspite]

Great, I've wandered into the Sound of Lameness. My torture is complete.

[skinofalizard]

[see above re: flail]

Where'd--? --what?

[ofsugarandspite]

Pro tip: If you want nobody to notice your dorky singing, you might not want to do it in the middle of an overpopulated camp full of very bored people.

[skinofalizard]

I'm in the middle of the woods! And it's not singing. It's a monologue.

[ofsugarandspite]

People do actually hang out in the woods, you know? It's not off-limits. And, whatever, it sounds equally gay.

[skinofalizard]

It's actually about his unrequited love for a woman.

[ofsugarandspite]

So he should man up and find someone else.

[skinofalizard]

That wouldn't make much of a play.

[ofsugarandspite]

I'd like it. Most plays are pretty faggy, anyway. Like Hamlet - could he be more boring?

[skinofalizard]

[barely contained rage: check]

...What's so boring about him?

[ofsugarandspite]

He's all whine, whine, whine. He takes him over half the play to actually do anything and he sends his girlfriend crazy. I don't see why he's such a prize.

[skinofalizard]

Maybe it's just the appeal of dating a prince.

[ofsugarandspite]

I wouldn't want to date a whiny prince that was going to break up with me and stab my dad. Sounds like a shitty deal to me.

[skinofalizard]

I don't think she knew that was going to happen.

[ofsugarandspite]

Of course not. The bit where she went crazy was like the only good part of the whole thing. It was pretty cool. I also liked when everyone died because they were all really annoying.

[skinofalizard]

...if only the real world worked like that.