(no subject)

[thedandymancan]

*There is a tiny boy on a fancy couch near the mess hall. A table in front of him is set up with tea services, complete with scones, petit fours, and finger sandwiches. The boy holds up an empty champagne glass before beginning to speak.*

Who do I have to sleep with in this place to get a glass of Dom Perignon? The service here is terrible...