ITP: CAKE AND SHANKING.

[a_valiant_rose]

[If you are down by the lakeside today, you might notice an extraordinarily large cake. In fact, it's so large that it looks like a person could even fit inside it! On the side, it reads "HAPPY BIRTHDAY ROSE

Comments

[cheerupemosquid]

[WHAT IS THE SOUND OF HATRED?]

[a_valiant_rose]

[I dunno, but I'm thinking it could possibly go to the tune of "The king and his men stole the queen from her bed..."?]

[cheerupemosquid]

["And bound her in her bones..."]

[or did I mean SNEAKY SNEAK UNDER THE WATER]

[a_valiant_rose]

[Oh, so more like the JAWS theme, then?]

[cheerupemosquid]

[That would possibly be more apt, yes.]

[now, if you could please come to the water's edge now....?]

[a_valiant_rose]

[Now why would I do a thing like that?]

[cheerupemosquid]

[.... because there is something shiny OOOH SHINY LOOK AT IT LYING THERE OOOOH MAYBE IT IS A PEARL]

[a_valiant_rose]

[HMMMM. Perhaps I shall wander down there and investigate]

[cheerupemosquid]

[ooooh I bet it's worth lots of moneyyyyyy ooooh]

[a_valiant_rose]

[ooooh look at it~ ...Wait a sec, the Doctor's talking to me LET ME TURN MY BACK ON YOU TO SAY SOMETHING TO HIM]

[cheerupemosquid]

[GOODBYE YOUR KNEES]

[a_valiant_rose]

[CRYING OUT IN SURPRISE AND PAIN and falling backwards.... and into the water. dammit.]

[cheerupemosquid]

[SUP WHORE I hope you want to get tentacled]

Ah, a fine day it is.

[a_valiant_rose]

Wha--?

[DSFJKSD NO TENTACLES PLEASE NO TENTACLES.]

[cheerupemosquid]

[YOUR BASE, I AM IN IT]

[WHILE SHOVING THIS SWORD INTO YOUR SHOULDERS]

[notamartian]

[THERE IS A SONIC SCREWDRIVER IN YOUR FACE ON AN EXTREMELY HIGH SETTING

WITH YOUR LOVELY SKIN IT SHOULD MAKE YOUR FACE START BUBBLING IN AN EXTREMELY PAINFUL WAY AND THIS WILL BE INSTANTANEOUS AND HORRIBLE]

I gave you your chance, Davy Jones. I warned you.