[PRIVATE TO EXCEL except actually it isn't. At all.]
TOP SECRET ACROSS CONQUEST LOG
DATE: CLASSIFIED
WEATHER: WHY IS IT STILL SO HELLA FREAKING COLD, JEEZ
Lord Il Palazzo is always finding new ways to surprise his loyal subordinates! Today was killer penguins. At least there was only a thin layer of ice, this time... seriously, what is this stupid weather? I tried to warm myself over the volcano and I felt like a microwave burrito afterward! All this hypothermia makes me kinda nostalgic, though. I wonder how Fukuoka is doing. And how Ma'n'Pa are doing, and Rain Man, and all the other people you'd think I would've forgotten by now... arrrrrrrggggggghhh, why does head trauma only make you forget your name and address and where you put your shoes?
Ah, but Lord Il Palazzo was handsomer than ever today! We're making headway on our mission, or so he says! Personally, I'd trade all our moral victories for one tangible one, but that's just my own selfish inferiority to Lord Il Palazzo! Still, though, hmm... maybe El and I should blow something up...
CURRENT IDEAS FOR CONQUEST:
DATE: CLASSIFIED
WEATHER: WHY IS IT STILL SO HELLA FREAKING COLD, JEEZ
Lord Il Palazzo is always finding new ways to surprise his loyal subordinates! Today was killer penguins. At least there was only a thin layer of ice, this time... seriously, what is this stupid weather? I tried to warm myself over the volcano and I felt like a microwave burrito afterward! All this hypothermia makes me kinda nostalgic, though. I wonder how Fukuoka is doing. And how Ma'n'Pa are doing, and Rain Man, and all the other people you'd think I would've forgotten by now... arrrrrrrggggggghhh, why does head trauma only make you forget your name and address and where you put your shoes?
Ah, but Lord Il Palazzo was handsomer than ever today! We're making headway on our mission, or so he says! Personally, I'd trade all our moral victories for one tangible one, but that's just my own selfish inferiority to Lord Il Palazzo! Still, though, hmm... maybe El and I should blow something up...
CURRENT IDEAS FOR CONQUEST:
- Turn people into dogs FAILED
- Set up a Pokemon gym
- Conquer the mess hall
- Excel Saga weekend
- Documentary tricking the ignorant masses into thinking some stupid thing like the earth is heating up at an unnatural rate and only ACROSS can save them Damn you, Al Gore!