The Perfect Weapon Chapter 2011: Part 4 section 1 of 2

[camillecarelli]

Chapter 2011: Part 4 section 1 of 2

Sark gasped and felt his head swim dizzingly. Anxiety rose in him until he realized that he was held securely. He wasn’t going to fall over. Hard hands held him up. It felt familiar, but... When had he stood up? He shook his head and felt a hard shoulder under his forehead. Sydney... He blinked, raised his head and opened his eyes. Sydney’s compassionate brown gaze met his...from behind Dave’s shoulder. He blinked again. Sydney was supporting Dave, as he...was supporting... Dave was supporting him. He looked down, confused, as he saw Dave’s arms holding him up although surely his injuries should have precluded that kind of strength.

He had been lost in that memory, as brief it was, and had sought out safety. Dave. He sighed, then sighed again, accepting the help of supporting hands. How long had it been since someone had...He began to stiffen, then stopped as Dave’s deep voice scaled walls he had thought impenetrable.

“Everyone needs someone to catch them from time to time, Julian,” Dave quietly told him as he felt Julian begin to retreat.

Looking into Dave’s eyes, Sark reverted to a moment in time when he’d last had the gift of love and had felt safe in the grasp of someone he’d trusted utterly to keep him safe with his own strength. “Not you,” Sark demurred.

“Yes, me.” Dave nodded at Sydney. “And Sydney, and Jack and Irina. Everyone. One reason I survived in that gulag was because of the kids. They gave me a reason to go on every day. Especially you. You were and are special to me.”

Sark started as he heard the words. He blinked and realized that he’d been standing, holding onto Dave’s hands. He dropped them abruptly and stared at the cuffs on his wrists. “I wouldn’t let go of you, would I?” Sark asked in a small whisper of sound, still looking down. He had shown weakness. Unacceptable. “Then, I mean. Then, when I was a child.”

“No, you didn’t let go.” Dave touched Sark’s shoulder. “There is nothing to be ashamed of, Julian. You were a scared little boy.”

“But-“

“And it wouldn’t be unreasonable to be somewhat scared now,” Dave added softly.

Sydney watched carefully and chose her words just as carefully. “Being confined is difficult. And it preys on the mind.”

Dave nodded. “It does. It’s easy to lose hope when the future is either-“

“I don’t need to be placated with platitudes!” Sark exclaimed, turning away, only to come to a quick halt as the guard stepped forward with a hand on his gun. He held his bound hands up in the universal sign of surrender. The guard stepped back.

“What do you need then?” Dave asked, his voice a deep rumble behind Sark’s back.

Sark turned abruptly. “I need the truth,” he demanded, although he felt the exhaustion in his body from that brief memory that touched on the truth he had a feeling would be terrible.

“You need to know the truth, yes. The question is whether you need to hear it third hand or whether you should relive it,” Dave said firmly.

“Why? Do you think I can’t handle my own memories?” Sark glared, determined to show no weakness, especially in the face of the open compassion both Sydney and Dave were displaying. For the love of god, how horrible was the truth?

“I think that there are some memories that are so extraordinarily horrific, that anyone would benefit from their excision,” Dave said sincerely. Since his return, he’d read with great interest of research to discover methods to prevent terrible memories from being impressed upon the brain before they could do great damage.

“I am hardly a weakling who requires protection from my own life-“

“Your life was taken from you and you were forced into another,” Dave argued.

“One at which I excelled-“

“Not really,” Sydney pointed out in a dry tone that reminded them all of her father. “You’re how old and you’re looking at life in prison?”

Dave rolled his eyes at Sydney and shook his head as he looked back at Sark. Gently, he said, “Now is the time to find your own way. I know it’s difficult-“

Sark stared at Dave. “Jack was correct. You cannot resist the urge to give advice, can you?”

Dave smiled ruefully. “I’m working on it.”

“But not right now, you’re not,” Sydney muttered under her breath. She recognized the look on Dave’s face; it was what her father referred to - also under his breath - as ‘Dave’s big brother attitude run amok’. “Here we go...”

“But right now,” Dave began. “I do want to give you something to think about-“

“Advice, you mean? Color me astonished.” Sark opened his eyes wide and ignoring Sydney’s choked laughter.

“Whatever.” Dave shrugged, as his eyes went from boy to girl and back again. A shared joke was always a good beginning for friendship. “It’s time for you to find your own way, your own path, something better than what you’ve lived in the past-“

Sark waved his hand dismissively. “I’ve survived.”

“So you have. And sometimes, that is the best one can do and nothing to be denigrated,” Dave agreed softly. “But long term? I would hope you want to do better than that. I would hope you hope to have more than that.” He felt Sydney nodding as she stood behind him.

Sark snorted, trying to hide his rising panic once again. What did they want from him? How could they know what to want from him when they and he didn’t even know who he was? “What is this? A lecture on my rights and responsibilities as an adult? What’s next, a rousing exhortation to say the bloody Boy Scout pledge?”

“No,” Sydney said quickly as the sound of Sark’s sudden harsh breathing filled the space between them.

“No one expects that. But...you may have other options if you wish to-“ Dave pressed, knowing that they had to hoe a delicate row with Sark; that in order to plant the seeds for the future they had to first turn the soil over.

Irina reached out her hand and scooped up a fistful of sand. She sifted it through her fingers as Jack poured them each some more wine. “I told Sydney about those Wednesday panties. That’s why she made sure I was wearing nice lingerie tonight.”

“She’s a good daughter. Usually.” Jack agreed with a smile as he handed Irina a glass.

“When she’s not inflicting the torture of the mall on me, I’d agree with you.”

“I hear you enjoyed the visit to the book store.” Jack ran his fingers along the length of her leg, then stopped to make sweeping circles over the curve of her hip.

“I bought a book of women’s erotica.” Irina smiled into her glass of wine and felt his fingers still. She slyly looked up into Jack’s surprised face.

“Oh?” Jack asked eagerly, as she gave his legs a sidelong glance that made his blood heat once again. “Maybe we could read it together in bed the way we used to-“

“I don’t know, Jack. Could you handle it? ” Irina shook her head and rested her hand on Jack’s bare thigh. As she spoke, she glided her hand upward, searching. “It might be too much for you. As I recall, when we read Jane Austen, you used to enjoy it immensely-” She slid her hand between his thighs. “Like that...Yes.”

“Oh, yes...” Jack agreed, watching her face with anticipation. What the hell was she doing?

“You know how little imagination I have.” Irina stopped when Jack began to snort. “Shut up. I thought I’d steal ideas from other people.” Irina’s grip tightened and she smiled as Jack’s eyes widened. “You know my pattern.”

“I have some ideas of my own, you know,” Jack prodded, shoving Irina’s bare foot with his own.

“Write a book and maybe I’ll read all about it,” Irina teased. She stood up and held out her hand. Jack took it and pulled himself up. Irina picked up the glasses and bottle of wine. She set off for the cliff’s edge and threatened over her shoulder, “And then quote it. Aloud. At improper times.”
Jack rolled his eyes as he picked up the blanket and shook it out, rose petals wafting around them. “I’m terrified.”

“I could give it to Sydney-“

“Give it to our daughter? Are you insane?” Jack asked incredulously, as he wondered what her game was this time.

Irina put her hand to her mouth as if in surprise. “Wait a minute. That already happened, didn’t it? The manual-“

Jack cleared his throat. He’d never be finished paying for the manual. What a shame. Not. “Speaking of books... Why were you two poring over The Lord of the Rings yesterday?”

“I was helping her find a quotation for Sark.”

“For Sark?” Jack raised his eyebrow. He grinned when Irina’s eyes went immediately to the gesture and her lips tightened. Well, some things never changed. He smiled and tucked the blanket under his arm. “You still can’t do that, you know.”

Irina tossed her hair over her shoulder and turned away with a smile she made no attempt to hide, knowing that Jack was following her. The chase game. Perfect, she thought as she reached the cliff and Jack caught her elbow with his hand, then her mouth with his lips. She sighed and whispered, “I could stay here for ever.”

“It’s natural to be concerned about the unseen future,” Sydney said softly. “I know I am. And I know at times I have felt that I couldn’t go on.” But your body did, the will to survive stronger than anything opposing it. “Or I felt that I didn’t want to go on the way I was. But need and want are different and...” Sydney sighed. “I’ve felt lost at times, confused.”

“So have I,” Dave agreed, then looked off into the dark distance.

“You have?” Sark asked, surprised. Even as a pile of rag and bone in that dark, dank cave, Dave had exuded power.

“Everyone, if they’re honest, has moments when they’re in a...pit and they feel that the journey they’re on is too much, takes too much. And for what? More of the same?” Dave whispered.

Sark nodded and looked down at his hands, then at Dave’s hands. One rested on Sydney’s hand and the other on his. The hand on his was the right hand, minus one finger. “Did you ever...think about turning back? About giving up?” What was that book Irina had forced them to read? About some little people and something about turning back and a story and....a ring.
“Yes, I did.” Dave took a deep breath as he looked down at his incomplete hand. “I thought about it. I wanted control,” Dave said abruptly. “I wanted to have control over my life. It was too much. All those years in that damn gulag - as much as I loved the kids, I, when I realized I was going to be imprisoned again...”

Sydney nodded. “We understand, Dave. Don’t we, Julian?”

Sark forced himself to relax. Act like an adult, he told himself. No one would rejoice in captivity. Dave’s desire to be free was no reflection on the level of his feelings for the children in his charge. “Quite. Which is to say, that I fully comprehend the ambivalence with which you perceived your--”

Sydney smiled. “We hear the polysyllabic words, Sark. We get it. You’re anxious.”

Sark groaned and pointed at Dave, his cuffs clinking together. “You did this to me!”

“Who, me?” Dave bit his lip to keep from smiling. Early imprinting was hard to eradicate.

Sydney gave Sark a light slap on his cheek. “Don’t worry. It reminds me of my father. It’s...cute.”

“Whaaat!” Sark growled. He bit his lip when he realized Sydney was trying to irritate him. He turned his face away from her and nodded at Dave. "Your story? What is it? Why, when did you feel like turning back?"

“But...you didn’t turn back,” Sydney whispered. “That’s not you. Then or now. That wasn’t your story.”

Dave frowned. “What do you mean?”

Sydney smiled ruefully. “I was trying to find a quotation-“

“Oh geez...” Dave groaned. “Not you, too.”

“Yes, me too,” Sydney teased. “I can’t help it. Early imprinting is hard to overcome-“ she stopped as Dave began to laugh. “Shut up. Anyway, I was trying to find a quotation because I thought it might help someone...else and oddly enough, it works here too.”

“Do tell, Sydney,” Sark said with an elaborate yawn he covered ostentatiously with his bound hands.

“No, on second thought, I don’t think so.” Sydney shook her head. “Although I’ll tell you it’s from Lord of the Rings.”

Sark’s mouth dropped open slightly. “Really? I was just thinking about that book - Irina made us read it and...”

Dave hid a smile as Sark and Sydney stared at each other incredulously. “It’s not surprising. That book is about a journey, isn’t it? And trials and being tested? Haven’t we all-“

“Yes,” Sydney said quickly. “But I’d like to hear about your story, Dave.” Somehow, she knew that Dave wouldn’t have brought up his own doubts just to hear himself talk. He must believe that Sark should hear the tale. “Wouldn’t you, Julian?”

Sark nodded slowly. “Yes, I do believe I would.”

Then he shrugged. “This is not our story, Sydney. It’s Dave’s. Let him finish it so that he can make the point he’s dying to make, that he has a painful past-“

Dave let out a long sigh. He had told the story to Jack and Jack only, in the throes of one of his deeply-despairing moments. He had sobbed, then cursed at his weeping, at his weakness, then and now. He had lifted his hand to cover his face, stopped by Jack’s stronger hand gripping his.

“Dave...” Jack had said quietly. “You don’t need to hide. You’re not weak. You’re alive.”

“I just...sometimes I wonder...why I am alive. Why didn’t I die? Is this a reward or a punishment or...” Dave shook his head. “If I hadn’t fallen, would I still be alive or...?”

“I know all about it, Dave...” Jack had whispered, touching the scar on his upper lip. “I know all about falling and hitting your head. I have the scar to prove it. To remind me, every time I look in the mirror, of the depths to which I might sink.”

Dave held up his hand. “And every time I look at my hand, I see my own failings.”

“Really? I look at your hand and see a friend who made sacrifices. I see no failings. Only strength.”

Dave took a long shuddering breath. “Really? Well, when I see that scar, I see a man who could have chosen to crawl into a black hole and never emerged, but somehow had the strength to stand up again and keep going.”

“We’re both survivors,” Jack said softly. “And sometimes, it’s all about taking that fork in the road. Sometimes surviving is...”

“Everything.” Dave nodded, then fell silent for a long moment. He slowly pushed himself up to a sitting position. “Until you can...do better.”

“Exactly.” Jack smiled and picked up a cup from the bedside table. “So. Red or green jello tonight?”

Dave shifted his unseeing gaze from the black velvet of the sky above them to the bickering boy and girl next to him. “I’ll tell you...” he began. "I tried to escape...”

“Arvin mentioned that your continual escape attempts were...annoying him,” Sark mentioned. He smiled slyly as he remembered Arvin’s barely-hidden fury.

Dave grinned. “Reason enough. Necessary and sufficient."

“So your escape attempts were just...ways to be a thorn in Sloane’s side?” Sydney asked. “No wonder you and Dad get along so well. You live to irritate others.”

Dave nodded. Maybe this time, Jack was right, and he should look for a woman he could tease the way Jack teased Lorena. Maybe this time...he should look for a little more drama. Maybe...he should stop thinking about that and just tell the damn story. “Okay, the truth is...I did try to escape seriously once. Early on- My game plan wasn't about annoying Arvin. That wasn't what I was thinking the first time I tried in Afghanistan." He lost his smile and fell silent.

Sark frowned as he searched for a meaning behind Dave's words. Had he tried in the Soviet Union? Had he...merely contemplated it? Had he feared what might happen to the children under his care if he tried to escape and succeeded or worse yet, failed.

Sark knew, knowing in that bone deep way of all truths, without having the facts before him, that Dave would not have abandoned 'his' children. No, he wouldn't have. Just as he'd tried to keep in regular contact with him as soon as he'd been able to. Dave really did...care about him. He stood a little straighter. "Go on, Dave. Please. What were you thinking when you tried to escape the first time?"

Dave looked at Sark, meeting his eyes. "I knew I couldn’t make it. I had no water, no shoes. Worst of all, I had no cover. No cover for a man on foot without any sense of his location or destination? Idiocy.”

“But...you just said that you knew escape was futile?” Sark asked, furrowing his brow. Then his gaze met Sydney’s and both sets of eyes widened.

“Dave...” Sydney whispered. “Does Dad know?”

“Yes. Of course. We have no secrets.”

Sark began to laugh. “Yes, as I recall from my experience of being your carrier pigeon, you even knew about Jack’s first time-“

Dave chuckled. “Knew? I was there-“
“AACK!” Sydney screeched, startling a seagull who had been innocently fluffing its wings while joining them on the roof. She jumped again as it cawed insistently and flew off. She poked her index finger into Dave’s shoulder. “I know what’s going on. You’re both being...men-“ And trying to avoid--

Sark smiled. “Hey, Dave. I’ve gone up in her estimation. I’m no longer a lowly worm, I’m actually a man-“

“Shut up.” Sydney poked at Sark’s shoulder this time. “You both retreating from a difficult emotional moment by acting like children-“

Dave sighed. “You’re right. I...just...” He bit his lip. He’d wanted to keep that...hero worship Julian had once had of him, the little boy who’d looked up to him... He looked at Julian and sighed, wishing once again that he hadn’t missed so much, that he’d seen the boy become a man, or nearly so. Now, it was time to put away childish things and focus on the future. Telling this story would help Sark and possibly Sydney, help them understand how one did not have to tumble into and stay in a pit. That one could fall, get up and keep going. “The truth is... When I was in Afghanistan. After I didn’t have you kids anymore and I was alone, in one cave after another, I...”

“You lost hope?” Sydney asked quietly. She watched Sark’s face change from surprise to acceptance and then to a look she’d never expected to see - compassion.

“Yes, for one...insane moment, I lost... Maybe I just snapped. I don’t know.”

“Anyone might snap after that sort of incarceration,” Sark agreed, remembering his first sight of the pile of bones and rags that had been Dave, or rather Dave’s body. The mind had been intact and adept at finding Arvin’s weakness. He had not doubted for a single moment that if Arvin had not shot Dave, he might have found a way to send Arvin screaming from the tunnel.

The worst enemy was a former friend; a simple fact they all knew. It was also a simple fact that anyone could be broken; one only had to find the correct combination to unlock the individual’s weakness. Something Irina had taught quite explicitly, but a truth he had known quite implicitly long before her educational demonstrations. “Anyone,” he repeated. “Especially with solitary confinement. Human beings, being pack animals, are deeply disturbed when they cannot interact with other humans and will respond negatively and generally quite rapidly to exclusion from...” He paused as both Sydney and Dave looked at him carefully. Stiffly, he concluded, “I beg your pardon. I was lecturing and worse yet, repeating a lecture given by another. How...repetitious of me. Inexcusable.”

“I agree, though, Juli,” Sydney said into the awkward silence. “There is no reason to be ashamed, Dave.”

“I’m not ashamed. I know that anyone can be broken-“ Dave broke off as Sark’s head jerked in his direction. Ah, he remembered that, anyway. “It’s pure arrogance to believe that oneself is the exception to the rule. Even the strongest person can be pushed too far. I know that. I saw that.”

“My father,” Sydney whispered, then clamped her mouth shut. She shouldn’t have said that in front of Sark.

“Many people, actually,” Dave nodded, feeling Sydney’s discomfort. He looked back at Sark. “So, one day the guards didn’t fully engage the lock on my chains-“

“Of course,” Sark nodded. “Lengthy incarcerations breed carelessness in the captors.”

“Yes. I’m sure Irina told you that.” Dave nodded in the direction of the guard. “So, I waited until long past midnight and I just...ran. No plan, no water, no nothing. I just wanted to...get to the next rise, where the sky seemed to kiss the ground and...” He pressed his lips together and looked up at the blackness above them, relieved only by the glow from below of manmade lights which nearly obscured the pinpricks of the stars puncturing the sky.

“Become one of the stars?” Sydney whispered.

Irina smiled as she wiggled back against Jack’s chest, safely nestled in the warm cocoon of his body enveloping her as they sat on the cliff and looked out at the stars. She ran her hand up his thigh, then down his calf, watching the diamonds sparkle in the remains of the light. Seven diamonds in the band, she reminded herself, symbolizing forever. And the three larger diamonds? “What else could those three diamonds stand for?” And if he noted that she’d ended the sentence with a preposition, she’d kill him. After she climaxed again, that was. A woman had to have her priorities.

“You dangled a prep-Ow!” Jack protested as Irina dug her nails into the arch of his foot.

“What were you saying?” Irina turned around and straddled Jack’s hips.

Jack slid his hands up Irina’s thighs and across her hips to grip her buttocks and pull her down on him again. “I have no idea. You tell me.”

Irina rotated her hips until she could see a light sheen of sweat appear on Jack’s chest. She stopped moving and smiled at his groan of frustration. She smiled again when his hands squeezed her hips and tried to move her. “You were supposed to tell me about this ring. Remember? You wanted to tell me all about it-“

“My wants have changed, actually and-“ Jack licked his lips and moved his hands upward to cup her breasts and rub the nipples with his thumbs.

“Too bad you’re so easily distracted,” Irina smirked as she watched him focus on her breasts. “I like to stay focused. Now. Tell me what the three center diamonds could mean. They could mean erogenous zones.”

“Three?” Jack smiled and lifted her breasts up. “Well, right now I see two...” He closed his eyes as Irina once again squeezed him. “You know, honey, that’s not exactly a disincentive. I like it when you do that.”

“I know. But it distracts you when you’re being irritating.”

“Ah. You’re manipulating me.”

“Manipulating you? No hands are involved...” Irina noted as she rocked back and forth. “Manipulate. From the Latin word, manus, meaning hand...” She stopped moving and began to hum.

Jack groaned and slid his hands down to her buttocks to pull her more tightly against him. “Well, this hand is about to slap your rosy little-“

Irina laughed.

Jack groaned. “Do that again and this will all be over much sooner than you expected.”

“Good...” Irina slid up until only the tip of Jack’s hardness was inside her. She bent her head and looked down at their joining. “Good point...” She whispered, then swiftly shoved her body back down. “Now, about those three center stones-“

“Can we talk about my stones and how-“

“Jaaack!” Irina laughed again. She slammed her hands into his chest and held him still. “I have the ring, so I get to be in control.” Unable to control herself, her hands caressed his skin, wishing she could touch all of him at once. Then, looking into his eyes, she knew just how to do so, leaned forward and gave him a kiss that contained all of the love she felt. Feeling his heart thud under her hand, she smiled.

Jack brushed his lips against hers, wrapping his arms around her as they sat quietly entwined for a long moment, their bodies connected only slightly less firmly than their hearts. Finally, Jack remembered. They had been playing some game. He kissed her left hand, reminding her. “The ring gives you control. Is that how it works?”

“Yes. Until I get you a ring, you’re out of luck.”

“Let me get this straight...” Jack smiled and arched his hips, sending his length up inside his wife until she moaned. “As long as I’m not wearing a ring, you’re in control? And that’s supposed to make me want a ring?” Jack laughed as he ran his hands along the curves of Irina’s body. He’d always liked this position. He could touch her everywhere.
“Yessss...” Irina moaned as Jack’s fingers touched her in just the right place with just the right rhythm while his mouth teased the skin of her neck. “Yesss...More.”

Jack stopped moving his hands.

Irina put her hands over his and shoved them toward her center. “Keep moving.”

“I think we’re moving too fast...” Jack smiled and shifting his legs, tipped Irina back onto the blanket, careful to avoid the rocks around them.

“I suppose that’s true.” Irina sighed regretfully and pushed back, disengaging their bodies. “You’re not a young man anymore - as you told me in Panama- JAACK!” Irina shrieked as, in retaliation for her comment, Jack’s fingers slid inside her to replace what she’d removed. She arched her neck back and groaned, before suddenly levering herself up on her elbows. “Let me guess...” She wiggled her left hand. “Three fingers...”

“You’re are so good at these games...” Jack smiled, as he moved his hand and slid his fingers up and over her wet softness.

“Oh, I know what is the greatest erogenous zone. Or rather the two greatest.” Irina ran her hands through Jack’s hair. “Your mind. That is how this woman captured this man...” She kissed Jack softly. “With the games and with...”

“You’re right,” Jack admitted easily. “You fascinated me.”

“And...you fascinated me.” Irina slid down to kiss Jack’s chest. “But what fascinates me even more is this heart of yours. This, for you, is the greatest erogenous zone. That night on the ice, when I told you I loved you...That was...”

“I wanted you so much...” Jack admitted, his voice dropping to a soft whisper. For so long that memory had been like a knife cutting out his heart, but now...the wounds had healed and he felt whole again. “I needed you. I...needed the love I saw in your eyes.” He exhaled.

She drew in a breath and wrapped her arms around his body, pulling him close until she could kiss the skin over his heart, as he’d done so often to her. “After everything you’ve experienced in your life...” she whispered, feeling him still beneath her touch. “The fact that you still have love to give, that you have the courage to give it...” She ran her hands endlessly over his skin, needing to feel the warmth, knowing it was hers for the asking. Now. “To give me a second chance...It’s everything.”

“Yes,” Dave said softly. “So. They forget to secure my chains. I had my chance and I ran for the rise. I waited until long past the time when my heart was beating fast, when I was just...dull with acceptance, until my...I got out of the cave and stopped. Blinking. Even as dark as it was, it was still lighter than the hole of the cave. The moon was out, I realized. It wasn’t as bright as day, but ...it was so much brighter than anything I’d experienced in so long and...” Dave stopped, then blurted out, “I’d forgotten that light was possible. Do you understand? I’d forgotten about light!”

Sydney gaped at him. He’d been chained in a cave in the darkness? In the darkness. That would have been enough to break anyone, anyone at all. She looked at Sark and saw the lack of surprise in his face and shook her head. “That must have been disorienting, then. To be suddenly free and in relative light.”

“I was...” Dave laughed abruptly and without humor. “I was frantic. Disoriented. I just ran. No plan, no water, no nothing. I just wanted to...get to the next rise I..wanted control of my life and I thought I’d found the only way. So I ran, but as I did, I...received a gift.”

“A gift?” Sark asked. “What kind of gift could you have possibly received, all alone in the desert? In the darkness?”

“I heard Jack’s voice.” Dave shook his head. Just as his intervention with the nurse, convincing her to whisper Sydney’s name had made all the difference to Jack in the mental ward, hearing a voice had saved him. Maybe he could have done it on his own, maybe Jack could have done it on his own. Who knew, who cared? Was it more important to have done it on one’s own or to have crawled out of the pit by any means necessary?

Dave looked down at his right hand, seeing Jack’s hand covering his, telling him of strength. He nodded and continued speaking. “I heard him asking, ‘What do you want?’ Then I remembered Jack and his options... I stopped at the ridge and realized... I could hear Jack’s voice asking, as he’d always asked us to think - what’s that phrase Irina told me... Yes, think outside the box. I heard Jack asking, ‘What are your options? All of them. Not just the most obvious ones or the easiest or even the hardest? What are all of them? Including the most improbable...”

“Option C,” Sydney said and Sark said in unison.

Jack lifted his mouth from Irina’s and then buried his face in the mass of her hair pooling around her shoulders. His lips moved along her arm and then along her collarbone, leaving a trail of heat that turned into wet fire as his mouth enclosed her nipple and began to suck and then bite gently on the nipple. Irina arched into his mouth. “That’s...one of my favorite erogenous zones...” she whispered, her voice hoarse.

“Mine too...”

“Now that that is decided...” Irina smiled. “Tell me about the meaning of those three diamonds.”

“Well, actually...” Jack lifted the ring to his mouth and kissed it. “There are seven more in the band.”

“Seven is a higher number than three,” Irina said absently, watching his lips as they traveled up her arm and down her body.

“Ah. I see why you got an A in advanced math,” Jack teased, as his lips feathered across her nipple, then nicked her lightly with his teeth.

“I’m not sure I’m capable of handling advanced mathematics tonight,” Irina groaned.

“Well, then. Let’s stick with the three diamonds. Three erogenous zones...” Jack lifted his mouth and licked Irina’s bottom lip. “It could mean...One lip.” He licked her top lip. “Two lips.” “And your tongue makes three. Or...There are three main erogenous zones. Options A, B and C.”

“Oh, do tell me all about the options,” Irina smiled and touched the tip of her pinkie to the edge of Jack’s mouth.

He turned his head and lightly kissed her finger, before giving it a quick nip with his teeth. “The mouth, of course. But we’ve already-“

“You can kiss me again, you idiot.” Irina clasped her hands around his neck and tugged on him.

“Can I? I would hate to be repetitive.” Jack smiled disappeared into her mouth as Irina pulled him down to her.

Biting his bottom lip, Irina licked the little wound, hearing his tiny indrawn breath. Smugly, she asked, “Would you also hate being hurt?”

“Depends upon the type of pain you’re suggesting, because as I recall in Panama you kept telling me to tie those straps I tore from the pillow tighter and tighter...”

“Shut up.” Irina rolled her eyes, even as she remembered the near...professionalism of his behavior in Panama with those straps. She should have realized then that something was wrong. She wanted a do over of that moment. Her way. ‘Or it could mean seven sensitive areas...” she mused, skimming her hands across his biceps. She really could bite him...right there...

“I don’t think I have seven...” Jack protested, as his hands cupped Irina’s breasts. He rubbed his thumbs across her nipples.

“Really? Think outside the box, Jack. I’m sure I could find seven. One...” Irina licked Jack’s lower lip. Then his upper lip. “Two.”

“If you’re counting my lips separately, then I suppose I should count yours separately as well.”

“Of course...” Irina moaned as Jack’s fingers separated her lower folds.
“Yes. Here. One... Two and then this...” Jack held her down with one hand on her pelvis and looked up to see the avid look on her face as she looked at his hand and then his mouth. Slowly brushing his thumb across the soft curls, he slid his fingers down and parted her once again. “One lip, two lips and...” He bent down and softly kissed her mouth, then moved his lips down her body to meet his hand and began kissing her skin once again. “A perfect match. My lips, your lips...And then there is this...” He licked her gently, feeling her breath catch and her legs begin to tremble. “My tongue meeting...your...little...” He flicked his tongue back and forth, teasing and taunting.

Irina groaned and arched her back, trying to get closer. When Jack’s hand held her still for his tongue to merely tempt her, she yelled in frustration, “If you say it’s like a little tongue, I’ll...”

“What? Come?” Jack smiled and felt the muscles in his cheeks ache. A pleasant little pain that reminded him of the much greater flooding of his heart with happiness this night.

“Not yet!” Irina groaned. Not yet, she wanted to make this moment last forever. This moment of light in what had been the darkness of her life. This moment of light that was now joining the memories of the past with her hopes for the future, showing her the path so clearly it was if the brightest sunlight shone down on them as she touched his cheek and gently ran her finger along the edges of his face, then traced his lips with her fingertip. “Not yet...”

“Did you say nyet?” Jack asked, sitting up quickly. “Of course, if you want to say no and have me stop....”

“Your heart can stop beating when I kill you!” Irina threatened, trying to hide her smile. Jack’s happiness at their teasing and laughter tonight was so much like the man she’d known, her Jack, but at the same time, seeing the faint lines in his face, mirrored in her own, she knew that happiness was a hard-won gift. “Get back to-“ She shoved at his shoulder, trying to urge him back down, then felt her hand curl over his skin, holding him close, hoping to stop the swirling and whirling of her mind as the seemingly-endless teasing pushed her and she hoped him, into a warm circle of the two of them, in which the only sense and the only anchor came from their grip on each other.

“Don’t be ridiculous. Of course it’s not like a little tongue. It can’t lick - verb, active tense. But it can be licked, can’t it? Verb, passive tense...” Jack licked Irina’s inner thigh. A thigh. Her thigh. Yes. That’s where he was. Where the hell was he? He was lost, but...not. He knew where he was. But the how and the when were lost to him in the heat of her body and the fulfilled hope in his heart as he found something much more important. As her arms enfolded him, he knew he had found the place he’d wanted to be for so, so long.

Irina closed her eyes as she felt Jack’s mouth and his hands mirror what she’d seen in his eyes. Unconditional love. Why had she ever thought that gift was negligible? It was everything. What had they been talking about? Oh yes, that option game. “That’s one option. Passivity on my part.” She smiled as she clamped her thighs around his shoulders and squeezed.
“True. Not one in which I’m interested tonight.” Jack pretended to cough as her legs slid down to his rib cage, keeping a clamping pressure on him, holding him in place.

“Oh? You might be interested another night?”

Jack smiled smugly as his hands cupped and caressed while she lay under him. “I think you are. Occasionally. I think you like it, sometimes, when I’m demanding and won’t take no for an answer.”

“Who, me?” Irina grinned and touched her neck, remembering the night of the necklace. She’d been along for the ride that night - after, of course, she’d almost forced him into it. An old pattern, one she’d intended to abandon, but it did have interesting consequences at times. When you pushed Jack just so far and then.... Hmm. Perhaps the better option was to take the best from the past, the best strategies and games and find a way to incorporate them into their future. A circle. Jack would like that. And she had a feeling he would like... Hmm, hmm, hmm. “Option B is when I’m the demanding one-“

“You mean like that time the air conditioner died?”

Irina groaned and ran her hands across Jack’s damp chest. “You were so hot and sweaty and...”

“You had your way with me. I was a poor, innocent boy, just trying to repair an air conditioner when the lady of the house insisted-“

“Ahem.” Irina snorted. Jack might have been innocent in the ways of love, but when it came to the body...

“A bedpost was involved, as I recall-“

“Ahem!” Irina began to laugh quietly. “I was thinking of the time I took those photographs of you...”

“Oh geez,” Jack muttered. He bent forward and rested his forehead on Irina’s belly. “Stop it.”

“I’m serious-“

“So am I. I already told you, if you give me photos of yourself with the chain, I’ll think about it.” Jack rolled his eyes, then stopped to close them and run his tongue along the curve of her waist. He wanted that photo... In frustration he bit the flare of her hip and heard her gasp. As if that photo were about to happen. He was beginning to think that she was never going to wear that damn chain, let alone take a photograph of it. Why she had always been so hesitant about that he never knew...okay, maybe, since he’d wanted it so much, she’d been a little nervous. But honestly! Was it so much to ask, one photograph and- What was she doing?

“That is a deal, right?” Irina asked, moving her hands down to encircle and then stroke Jack’s hardness. “Right?”

“What?” Jack shook his head and lifted his gaze from his wife’s ever-so-talented hands to her face. “Yeah, sure. Whatever. Let’s move on to Option C.”

“Option C?” Irina asked, her fingernails gliding up the underside of Jack’s hardness. “Tell me.”

“Didn't you already tell me? I’m confused,” Jack admitted, belatedly wondering what he’d agreed to moments before. She looked too smug. What did she have in mind? He grinned with anticipation. A year ago such an expression on her face would have raised his anxieties. Now, something else was arising and it wasn’t his anxieties. Then he wondered why he was looking at her face when her hands were engaged in such interesting activities. He sucked in a breath as her grip tightened. “I truly thought I heard you talking about Option C.”

TBC at Chapter 2011 Part 4 Section 2 of 2