I don't know what should go here
Well, Tom and I broke up after nearly two years. I don't know what's wrong with me. Why I can't hold onto relationships. I must be addicted to loneliness and misery.
Lately I've felt that I'm not even recognizing myself anymore. I'm obsessed with exercise, coffee, tanning at a tanning bed, getting blonde highlights, and today I was working with an interpreter to teach parenting skills to a Brazilian mother. What the hell do I know about parenting skills? I'm not engaging in many art projects anymore...not even writing. Who am I right now? A southern California-version of my older self? I guess Charlotte has finally seeped into my bloodstream.
All my clients are in crises, so that's been a good distraction. A very exhausting, codependent distraction. I take comfort in knowing that the year I turn 30 will be the year I am a fully licensed psychotherapist. At this point, I'm all shop talk/think/sleep/eat. And hopefully in a month I'll be moved out.
Kinda broke my pinky finger again last night. Oops. And I've been having mad chest and stomach pains today, emanating through to my back. I need to slow down. I got a massage today and the therapist was astounded by the knots in my neck and shoulders.
In the morning I get my 90-day review at work. Kinda nervous, but I think it should go okay. I was invited to present at a big meeting today for the CEO of the company. He hand-picked me especially to represent the therapists and I was told to take that as a big compliment. Okay, sure.
Happy New Year, everyone.