A Second Chance?
He woke up with the back of his neck prickling in a way it had not done for many years. It often meant that someone with magic, or “gifts”as they were often referred to, would turn up on his doorstep, an invisible force drawing them there. He waited for better part of the day, and then on a whim, grabbed his car keys and headed to into the small town.
He saw her almost immediately, she was wearing jeans and a leather jacket, long black boots, her long black hair loose around her shoulders, looking for all the world like every other beautiful, modern young woman. H e stared at her as she walked along the footpath, talking on her mobile phone. He thought his eyes were playing tricks on him, after all these years was he finally going completely mad? But it was her, no mistaking. What was she doing here, and how? Had she come after him to revenge her death? Was Arthur around too, somehow without him knowing? He had better find out. She glanced at him as he walked past her, without any recognition. He surreptitiously followed her for a short while , when she went into the supermarket, he followed her in and made to bump into her as she was looking through some apples. “Hello Morgana”he said quietly. “Its just Morgan” she replied and then frowned “I’m sorry, have we met before?” He faltered slightly, could she not remember him? “I’m”he hesitated, “Its me, Merlin, do you remember me at all?”
There was a slight pause as she froze and then he watched, stunned as her eyes rolled to the back of her head and she started to fall in a dead faint. He managed to catch her before she landed on the floor. This was not the reunion he’d envisaged at all, instead, he found himself at the centre of a small crowd, offering everything from cups of tea, calls of an ambulance and some other completely useless advice (warm towels? boiling water?really? Did they think she was about to give birth?). After a few minutes she blinked hazily and came around. He helped her sit up, still wary of what her reaction would be.
“Are you OK”He asked, she nodded and stared at him
“Do you want me to take you home or something?”
She shook her head. “I’m staying at a B&B for a few days with a friend, not too far from here, she’s probably there now”
He watched her for a few more moments, as the crowd started to disperse the excitement over, and then said. “I think perhaps we should talk, somewhere private would be best. I live about an hour away, we could go back to my place if you like”
She nodded and stood up “Are you sure you’re all right?”he asked, she still looked rather pale and shaky from the shock. “She nodded again, “Do you need to call your friend?” Her silence was rather unnerving him. To be honest he had expected screaming and fireballs being flung in his direction.
‘Yeah, I better” She dug into her handbag and rummaged around for her mobile phone. She managed to get hold of her friend and told her she’d run into to somebody she knew “Yeah, an old friend”she said looking at Merlin, “look I don’t know when I’ll get back, I’ll see you later OK’ and she rang off.
“Umm, right then, do you need anything? Your apples?” looking at her still-shocked face he concluded “maybe later then”
They left the store and walked to his car, and drove home, pretty much in silence. Clearly neither knew what to say. What could you say to somebody who you thought you’d killed over a thousand years ago? He thought ruefully, it was clear that she remembered him now, but how much, and how much of her was the old Morgana?
They walked into the house “Do you want a cup of tea or anything? He offered, “Or I’ve got a really old bottle of Scotch that I think is crying out to be drunk. I think I could use a drink, you?
She nodded. “Sounds good to me”
He dug out some glasses and found the bottle of Scotch and poured them both a good measure.
She walked around the house taking sips.
“Nice view”she said as she looked out the window to a lake and the surrounding paddocks filled with cows and horses . He nodded “It is”he acknowledged. He had built the house here solely for the lake. It wasn’t Arthur's lake, but was still very special, as was the woodlands at the back of the house. There were many things in the lake and forest that he fiercely protected from prying eyes.
“Morgana” he started “Its Morgan, she corrected him.
“ Morgan, I’m sorry I gave you a shock before.
She smiled ruefully at him “That’s a massive understatement”she chuckled.
“Yeah I suppose it is”he agreed. Pouring them both some more.
“How much do you remember”he asked “of your past, of Camelot?”
She shivered, thinking “Not a lot, bits and pieces really. When I was little I always said I was her, that King Arthur was my brother and I had magic, but everybody just thought I had an overactive imagination. “Did they ever”he hesitated, he’d seen people who had magic, or just claimed they had magic go through some horrific things, even these days people could be dragged off and committed in an institution. She looked at him “No, They just thought it was a small quirk, nothing serious to worry about, like I said, I really don’t remember an awful lot.”
“Tell me” he asked, interested
She sighed “Where to start? I’ve got a very normal family, no secret half-brothers or sisters lurking in any closets. No Arthur, no Uther, no Gorlois either, just me and my mother and father, who are Mr and Mrs Joe Boring. I had a very very ordinary childhood, just sometimes... I had dreams, or flashes of memory I suppose they were, of another life, a feeling of being wronged and being angry and confused and I never really knew why”
“You had a lot to be angry about" Merlin said quietly
“But that’s not me, not this me”she countered
“But Morgana, you had every right to be angry. A lot of people failed you, myself included. I could have, should have done more. I left you to your destiny, I should never have done that I should have been a better friend”
She frowned. “Destiny isn’t predetermined, you make your own”
“You would be surprised”he told her.
She shook her head “There’s so much I don’t remember, how about you? How much do you remember of your past life?
Merlin laughed, “I don’t have a past life, just this, very very long one”
He poured himself a large drink and downed it in one go, “Damn, need another bottle” He got up and went in search of another bottle. Obviously avoiding a topic he very rarely talked about, and tried not to ever think about. Morgana however was intrigued.
“What to you mean, one long life, do you mean you’re not reincarnated?”
He looked at her, “No, I’m not reincarnated or anything, I just never died Morgana, simple as that, when you trapped me in the crystal cave, I walked into the light, I never aged after that “he shrugged”I’ve just kept on going”
She looked at him wide-eyed “You mean, you’re like Captain Jack? Immortal then”she laughed suddenly
He scoffed “I am nothing like Captain Jack, for starters, he’s an entirely fictional character”.
“Pity, my friend thinks I’m hooking up tonight, maybe later then” she said playfully
Merlin laughed “Maybe” he replied vaguely, modern women were so forward, he still was never sure if they were propositioning him or not, but still, he wasn’t complaining.
“So have you met any of the others then? “
“No”he admitted ,” I’ve never met anybody before who’s been reincarnated before, you’re the very first, but its possible there are others out there”
He sat back down and poured them both some wine which he’d found.
“Anyway, Morgana, Once High Priestess of the Old Religion, what do you do with yourself now?”
So she told him of her current life, how she wanted to help people, so she was studying to be a psychologist, but might change over to something else, how she grew up, her friends, and family Merlin concluded, listening with a smile, it all sounded very pleasant and very ordinary, and also very much like the Morgana her first knew, young, idealistic and determined.
She also spoke of how when she was younger, she thought she had magic and could move things around by sheer will, but never managed it.
“Do you think” she asked”that I have magic, in this life too?”
He looked at her, his eyes glowing gold for a moment. He heard he catch her breath at the sight, but he could feel no magic emanating from her.
“Its possible, though your magic didn’t manifest itself until you were older, probably around age you are now, and when it did, you were able to see things in the future, have you ever had dreams that have come true?”
She shook her head, “No, never”
“Well, if you do, you can come to me if you like, there’s no need to feel alone and frightened by what happens, if it ever does happen that is”
“I’d like that very much” she replied.
“Maybe that’s why I felt your presence, maybe it will come to you soon”
“Do you really think so?”
He nodded
It was getting late, they’d drank and snacked their way through the afternoon and into the evening.
“You tired? You can stay here the night if you like, there’s a spare bed?’
She nodded gratefully “I don’t think I could face going back to the B&B tonight” she paused.
“You know, I do have a recurring nightmare and I don’t know what it means. I’m trapped in a dark place, I can’t move, I can’t do anything, but something is with me, something that cries and roars, but is comforting all the same”
Merlin sighed “Oh Morgana, I’m so sorry, I never knew, you see, If I’d have known, I would have got you both out, you have to believe me, what happened to you is something I never would have wished upon anybody”
“What do you mean”she asked.
“It was a pit, you were captured with Aithusa and kept chained in a pit for 2 years”
She was horrified. ‘Oh my God, who would do such a thing”
“A man - not Arthur, but a very evil man, I killed him, only because he was going to kill Arthur, well, you set him up to kill Arthur, but If I’d have known sooner...”he trailed off.
She thought for a minute and then asked “Who’s Aithusa?”
“You don’t remember? He asked, she shook her head again “No”
“Come on then, grab a coat, lets go outside”
“What”? Now? Its pitch black, not to mention freezing”
“Exactly”he replied, and looked at his watch, “this is a good as time as any”
Merlin found a coat for her and led her out to the back of the house, where there appeared to be a forest. “Stick with me”he instructed.
They walked for several minutes until she said “Merlin, you didn’t bring a torch, I can’t see a thing”
He grinned at her “Don’t need one”and a bright blue light appeared in his hand “This better for you?”
She nodded amazed, and kept following him, until they found a clearing, where halted and suddenly let out what sounded like an inhuman roar. “He grinned at her again’”Just wait’
After a minute or two a gigantic white beast with wings appeared and landed in front of them.
“Aithusa”he said patting her “I’ve brought somebody here to met you” Morgana stepped forward and realised she was looking at a large dragon, something she had always thought of as a dream, or her imagination, never quite seeing the whole picture, but now she remembered. She laughed softly looking at this beautiful creature who, in her memory, was horribly maimed and disfigured. But no longer, she was magnificent with pearly white scales with glowing blue eyes.
“You can come closer”Merlin told her “Just slowly, so she doesn’t get scared, she’s not used to other people”
Morgana walked slowly towards the dragon, her hand outstretched and said quietly “Aithusa, do you remember me? “
The white dragon nodded and dipped her nose to Morgana’s outstretched hand “She doesn’t talk much”Merlin whispered, “she couldn’t for such a long time, growing in that pit you were in damaged her an awful lot, I tried to heal her as much as I could, and also growing even bigger has helped as well. When you first knew her, she was just a yearling”
“I’m sorry”Morgana said to the dragon “It’s not your fault”Merlin told her “Listen, I think she’s almost purring!” and indeed a rumbling, satisfied sound came from dragon.
Merlin smiled as he watched Aithusa and Morgana together, two old friends reunited.
“What can all this mean”Morgana wondered.
“I don’t know”Merlin replied “Maybe we are being given a second chance to get things right’ They both laughed unaccountably, with the large white dragon looking on, with a content look in her eyes. “I think everything will be all right this time , don’t you?”