Of yule logs and magical entities for archaeologist_d
Title: Of yule logs and magical entities
Recipient: archaeologist_d
Author: marchioness_in
Rating: G
Pairing/s: Merlin/Arthur
Summary: Every year they cut down a yule log for the festival. It's Arthur's first yule as king and he's nervous. Accompanied by the knights this year, as he strikes the tree, it opens up and a man tumbles out.
Warnings: none
Word Count: 4984
Author's Notes: Hey archeologist_d, this is my first time writing something like this so I really hope you like it!
Disclaimer: Merlin is owned by the BBC and Shine. No copyright infringement is intended and no profit is being made. Don't send us to the dungeons.
Of yule logs and magical entities
Winter had to be one of Arthur's least favourite times of the year. It was too cold, the snow made it impossible to train, go hunting or even just step out of the castle. It was also a time everyone when everyone was cooped up inside and spending it with family, and that was when he was reminded more acutely of how alone he was. He had the knights, and Morgana, and Gwen and even Gaius, and he loved them and he knew they loved him but there was an emptiness inside that he couldn’t explain, that had crept up slowly and worsened through the years. It was always worse in this time with nothing to do except occupy himself with his thoughts.
So, when Yule approached he was understandably relieved. They would need a log to burn in honour of midwinter. The log was almost a whole tree and had to be taken from the land, so it was the one day when they ventured out despite the heavy snow and biting cold, to the forest. It was a tradition that Arthur remembered from his childhood and knew had existed long before even his father’s youth. Yule, he had always felt was a little more magical than the other celebrations. His father, whom Arthur had seen to not care much for the more magical traditions, still followed this one. He had instilled in him the importance of choosing the right tree and how it was always the king who had to make the first strike. Arthur, obviously did not know about the more magical connotations of the celebrations but now that magic was no longer illegal he wanted to learn more.
The morning of the day they were to get the log (which had become a tradition unto itself) dawned bright and cold. It had snowed in the night and the whole of Camelot was dusted in white. Arthur dressed in his warmest furs and ate his breakfast hurriedly. He was to join the knights in the entrance hall. He grimaced at the meagre food and thought that they could hunt some game if they found the tree quickly. It would greatly cheer the castle to finally have some meat and would be a fine addition to the feast, which was to be on the morrow.
In the hall, the knights were dressed similarly. Gwaine grinned up at him as he walked towards them. ‘Excited to finally go outside, Princess?’ Now I just know you’ve had too much of being cooped up inside’.
‘I’m not a dog, Gwaine.’, Arthur rolled his eyes.
Gwaine got that twinkle in his eye which spelled nothing good but was stopped from saying anything by Leon hurriedly cutting in. ‘Sire we should get going, we don’t know how long it might take to find a tree and you know it gets dark so quickly these days.’
‘Oh yes, Gwen wouldn’t want us to be out too late in this weather’, Lancelot added and then Percival chimed in with ‘Sire, have you decided what type of tree you want?’ All the knights turned to look at him curiously. Different trees meant different things and it was believed that the tree defined your intentions for the year. His father always chose an oak to symbolise leadership, strength, resilience and endurance.
Arthur had thought long and hard about it. He turned away and said, ‘Yes, I thought we could get a birch this year’. He still wasn’t sure about his choice but a birch stood for fertility, cleansing and new beginnings and Arthur thought it was fitting for his first Yule as monarch. He had long ago decided he was not going to rule like his father, and choosing different intentions would be another way he was determined to deviate. He was still lost in his thoughts when Morgana appeared.
‘You’re looking maudlin’. She smirked at him. ‘Another long night alone in your cups, brother dear?’
Arthur rolled his eyes, ‘Did you come down in all this cold for this Morgana?’.
She scoffed, ‘As if. I know you’re going out to get the Yule tree today. I just wanted to make sure you didn’t accidentally hit your head before even stepping outside the castle’. She attempted to smile innocently at him then. Attempted, because she was a harpy and obviously could never look innocent. She smiled at the knights and added, ‘And dear Gwen wanted to make sure that you were all dressed appropriately. Wouldn’t want any of you falling sick now. There’s only so many whiny brats we can take care of at one time’.
Gwen had drifted over to where Lancelot was standing and was ensuring that he and all the knights were covered properly. At Morgana’s remark, she hid a smile behind her hand and said, ‘We only wanted to wish you well for the day, and since it did snow quite a lot last night I thought I’d make sure you all wore your wools. It’s not that I think you would forget, but well Morgana is right, we can’t have more people falling sick. Not that if you did fall sick we wouldn’t take care of you.’ She smiled sheepishly and then added softly, ‘And well, it's your first Yule as king, so we wanted to wish you well before you left Arthur.’
Arthur cleared his throat and awkwardly thanked her. ‘I’m…We’re grateful, Guinevere. Err…we had better get going now, we don’t how long it might take.’
The knights suppressed smiles, except Gwaine who snorted outright, at his poor acceptance. Well, no matter, it was common knowledge that Arthur didn’t do feelings. He cleared his throat self-consciously again and started towards the door. The knights seemed to get the idea and followed. Just before he stepped out, Morgana called from behind, ‘Arthur, remember not to be your usual arsey self in front of strangers okay?’ and then laughing madly (because again, she was a harpy) took Gwen’s arm and took off into the castle, presumably towards her rooms, leaving him sputtering at the door having not even got in a good rebuttal.
*************************
They rode out of the citadel towards the forest. The snow was not too thick but it was still slow going. The knights chattered behind him, he could hear Gwaine laughing at a joke he’d made himself, and normally he would have joined in but he was anxious then. Arthur would never say it out loud but there was a tiny part of him that was scared he was not going to live up to the precedents set by his father. He knew he was probably overthinking the matter but he couldn’t stop himself.
Arthur stopped his mount near the edge of the forest and turned around, prompting the knights to halt as well. ‘We’ll look around here, I don’t want us venturing too deep into the forest’.
Elyan looked around and seemed to be in thought. ‘There’s a clearing here a few miles north, although I haven’t been there in a while, I remember seeing some up there.’
‘We’ll head there then’, Arthur decided. ‘You’ll lead the way Elyan.’
They followed Elyan and sure enough a while later as they neared the clearing they could see the white trunks of the birches some way ahead. ‘Should we split up Princess?’, Gwaine called out from behind, ‘it’ll be faster, and if someone finds an appropriate tree we can just call out to each other.’
Arthur thought about it. It would be faster to look in pairs rather than as a group. Although he had been itching to go outside for a while, now that he was there he missed the warmth of the castle and especially his chambers. He agreed and said, ‘Okay we’ll split up into pairs, you go with Percival, Elyan and Lancelot can go together and Leon will be with me.’ He turned to Leon and was satisfied when he got a nod in return. Of all of them, Leon was the only one who had accompanied him for one of these earlier. ‘Look for a sturdy tree, it needs to last twelve days. I know it snowed last night but try to find one that’s somewhat dry. Make sure the wood is not rotten and-’
He was cut off by a groan from Gwaine. ‘Gods, Princess I think you can trust us to locate one tree.’
Arthur sighed and said,’ Just don’t go too far.’ Percival and Gwaine took a path towards the right, but not before Gwaine had given him a cheeky wink and a salute.
‘We’ll find a good tree, Sire, don’t worry’, Lancelot said gently. He smiled at Arthur and then rode on towards a path in the centre with Elyan. Arthur and Leon were the only ones standing in the clearing now. Arthur cleared his throat and turned to him. He had paired Leon with himself not only because Leon was his first knight, but also his oldest friend. If there was one person he could talk to about his doubts, it was him.
‘Leon’, he began. ‘I…do you think the birch is the right choice?’ Arthur was surprised, that was not how he had decided to broach the topic.
If Leon was surprised by the question he did not show it. He merely said, ‘If that is what you think is right then I don’t see why not.’
‘But what if….what if the others don’t think so? What if I should have just gone with the oak?’, Arthur asked desperately.
Leon must have understood the underlying message because his face softened. He knew the complicated relationship Arthur had with his father and although he didn’t bring it up, Arthur was sure he had thought of it in that instant. ‘Sire, I know you’ve thought about it a lot and didn’t take the decision lightly. I’m sure everyone will welcome this change.’
The statement spoken softly and so simply was enough to reassure Arthur. He let out a long breath, which fogged in the cold air. He stared at it till it disappeared. He had decided for a reason, and he was going to stand by it. He took another deep breath and then turned to Leon and gave him a half smile. ‘Thank you, Leon.’
Leon smiled back at him. ‘No problem, Sire.’ Then he added, ‘Arthur, you need to believe in yourself. We all do.’ Arthur looked at him for a moment, nodded and then pulled his mount towards the left path.
*************
They were not long on their way when Arthur heard Elyan and Lancelot calling for them. He turned to Leon, and they both turned their mounts towards the clearing.
‘Ah sire, we think we have found the one’, said Lancelot. Gwaine and Pervical rode in from the other direction. Gwaine was pouting. ‘I wanted to be the one to find the tree.’ The knights snorted in amusement at that.
‘I think we’ve found a good one sire.’ Elyan said. Gwaine adopted a sincere expression and began in an earnest tone (or at least Arthur assumed that was what he thought was earnest), ‘But is it tall and sturdy? Will it last the entire twelve days? Is the-oof, Perce, what was that for?’
Percival had elbowed him and was biting back a smile. ‘Leave it, little man. Come on now.’
They tied their mounts in the clearing and began in the direction where Elyan and Lancelot had gone, on foot. Percival carried the two axes they'd brought with them. Arthur wondered how they were going to take the tree back. They had no cart, it was not possible in such weather. The best they could do was tie it behind one or two of the horses and drag it back.
Lancelot and Elyan led them deeper into the forest, and to the tree. It was a good one, neither too tall nor too short. They would be able to bring it down comfortably between them. In past years, Uther had taken a larger party consisting of knights and woodcutters, because oaks were thicker and required more labour. He was sure that people had wondered why he'd chosen such a small group to accompany him but they'd know soon enough.
Arthur gave his nod and then Percival handed him an axe. It wasn’t even such a big thing but to Arthur, it felt like one of the most important things ever. He had a funny feeling in his stomach and holding the axe took a deep breath. He had been obsessing over the choice and now that he was here with the axe in hand it felt realer. The loneliness and the doubts about his rule, the second thoughts on his choice, it all seemed to choke him in that one instant. He wished there was something, someone who could be there in that instant and make it easier for him. He hefted the axe and struck the tree. For a second there was silence and before he could lift it again for the next strike the tree split in two and a man fell out of it.
*********************
Arthur was standing there stunned. His mind still couldn’t quite comprehend what had happened. Around him, the knights seemed to be in a similar state of disbelief. It was Gwaine who recovered first and asked with his characteristic nonchalance, ‘Well then, who might you be?’. He even added in a wink as if this was someone at the tavern and not some man (was he even a man, a mortal like them?) that had come out of a tree!
Arthur looked at the man, as he straightened from the crouch that he had landed in and surveyed them all, ignoring Gwaine’s question. He looked to be about as tall as Arthur himself and had dark curly hair and a not altogether unpleasant face. He was dressed in a dark brown robe. When his gaze stopped at him, Arthur was stunned a second time because something in the man’s gaze went straight to his belly. It was difficult to breathe for a second as the man seemed to stare even harder, drinking in all of him. Then he turned to look at the knights and Arthur could breathe again.
Feeling disoriented, he finally seemed to realise that this was a strange man in the woods with them. He dropped the axe and drew his sword. That seemed to wake the rest of the knights because they too drew their swords, and this time Arthur asked, ‘Answer us, who are you? Where did you come from?’
The man just smiled and said brightly, ‘Oh hey! Yeah, I’m Emrys, but I’d prefer it if you called me Merlin.’ Then he brought his hand up as if to shake Arthur's. Arthur took a hasty step back and shook his sword at this Merlin/Emrys man, ‘Stay back! Where have you come from?’
‘Hmm, a little bit of a prat aren't you?’, Merlin narrowed his eyes at Arthur. Again there was that weird sensation in his belly. Behind him, Gwaine snorted and said gleefully, ‘Ahh that's our Princess for you.’
One of the knights hushed him but Merlin was grinning at him conspiratorially. Arthur cleared his throat loudly and obnoxiously, Merlin turned to him again. He sighed and said, ‘Well I came from the tree obviously’. The audacity of this man! Acting as if Arthur was the one who was insane and not he, the man who had appeared from a tree!
‘You cannot live in a tree.’ Arthur rolled his eyes and said rudely. ‘So did you use magic?’
‘Well obviously’, Merlin began slowly, again acting as if Arthur was the dim one. ‘I don't live in the tree, but because I'm Emrys I'm hmm… sort of connected to all the trees of the forest you know?’
Arthur was sure the knights understood about as much as him which was about nothing, but still, Lancelot ventured hesitantly, ‘But you see we don't know what that means. We don't have much experience with magic.’
Hearing that made Arthur feel a little ashamed even though he knew there was nothing he could have done about it, and a shrewd look came into Merlin's eye. ‘Not much experience with magic huh?’ His gaze seemed to hone in on the red cloaks which everyone and their mother knew were the symbol of Camelot. He must have realised that but he didn't say anything about it. Instead, he put his hands on his hips and said with even more cheer in his voice than before, ‘I'm kind of the leader of the druids, but yeah I have magic so I'm kind of also connected to the forest. You know you can put those swords away now, I’m not here to harm you.’
‘Why are you here anyway, not that I’m complaining’, Gwaine asked. Arthur turned, aghast at the behaviour of his knight, and saw Gwaine grinning at him. He knew Gwaine did this all the time to tease him but he still huffed.
‘Oh yeah, somebody made a wish, so here I am’, Merlin stated proudly. And they were back to square one, where Arthur had no idea what was going on. Honestly, he’d thought they were getting somewhere, what was this about a wish now?
He sighed and put his sword down. Then he rubbed his forehead and said wearily, ‘Now let me get this straight, you’re somebody called Emrys and Merlin, you have magic, you live in a tree and you’re here because somebody made a wish?’
Merlin nodded and went, ‘ Yep, pretty much, although I will say this again, I don’t live in a tree.’ He rolled his eyes and whispered to the knights, ‘Not very bright this one huh’.
Arthur puffed out his chest. ‘Shut up. You can’t talk about me like that. I’m the King of Camelot. And nobody here has made any wishes, so you can go.’
Merlin just shook his head. ‘Nope. I can’t leave till I fulfil it.’
Arthur took another deep sigh. This man was insufferable, never mind that he felt strangely invigorated just arguing with him. ‘Did you not hear me? It shouldn’t be possible with those ears anyway. Nobody. Here. Made. A. Wish. So go away, wherever you came from.’
Merlin looked at him, unimpressed. ‘Gods, you really are an ass.’, he muttered. Then louder he said, ‘And I just told you I can’t leave till I fulfill it yeah. What are you lot doing here, by the way, it's too cold, I thought you’d be shut up in your castles and whatnot.’
‘We’re here to get the Yule log mate’, Gwaine chimed in happily. ‘That tree you came out of was to be the one.’
‘Ahh, it's that time already?’ Great, should I take it down, the axe is just cruel don’t you think.’ He moved to face the tree and lifted his hands.
‘What could a skinny fool like you do?’, Arthur scoffed. Merlin ignored him and closed his eyes. He said a few words and opened his eyes, which flashed gold. Arthur was so mesmerised by the colour that he did not notice how the tree just uprooted itself and lay down in front of them.
‘Um, what-’, he began incoherently but Merlin was already moving past him. He turned to the knights and said, ‘Did you bring horses or carts? Who’s going to carry this? Well, I could float it behind me if you want. Wait, how far is the castle, you do live in a castle right?’
‘Our horses are a little ways down, in the clearing’, Lancelot said.
‘Yeah, Perce and I can lug it till there and then we’ll tie it to the horses.’, Gwaine added.
‘By which you mean I’ll do it alone’, Percival sighed.
‘Now hold on, why didn’t we decide how we were going to carry it back before we left’, Elyan asked sounding baffled.
Arthur spluttered in the background watching how easily his knights were interacting with this mad somewhat attractive stranger. At least, Leon was sensible and stood by him. He turned only to watch Leon walking towards them and saying, ‘Well um if he can float it, won’t that make it easier?’
Arthur stood there slightly bewildered. What on earth had just happened?
********************
They reached the castle much quicker than Arthur had anticipated. Merlin had floated the entire tree behind them and chattered incessantly with Gwaine throughout the ride. Arthur was surprised at how the rest of the knights had also been comfortable enough to join in here and there.
At the castle, there was a mad scramble of grooms rushing about because no one had thought they would be back so soon either. Confused and feeling strange by the encounter Arthur didn’t linger too long with the rest of them. In all the confusion of Merlin appearing they hadn’t even had the chance to hunt something! He gave orders to Leon to take the tree to the Great Hall and to arrange for a chamber for Merlin. While talking to Leon he had seen Merlin laughing with Gwaine and felt an unfamiliar stirring in his stomach. He decided to visit Gaius before retiring to his chambers.
He had just entered the castle when he saw Morgana and Gwen rushing towards him. ‘Arthur, you‘re back so quickly? Is everything alright?’, Morgana asked. Gwen wrung her hands and said, ‘One of the chambermaids saw all the grooms rushing and informed us. Is everyone okay?’
Arthur wondered how he was going to explain what had occurred in the forest. Yes, Morgana was the Court Sorceress but surely even she would find the act of a man appearing from a tree, strange. And how was he to explain the strange man they’d returned with? Said strange man must have had some sixth sense because Arthur heard him shouting his name. He turned to see Merlin running up to him.
Arthur sighed. Of course, it would have been impossible to hide this from Morgana, but he had hoped to delay it for a while. ‘Arthur, who’s this?’, asked Morgana.
Merlin had reached them now and heard the question. He smiled and said, ‘I’m Merlin, but the druids also call me Emrys.’
A strange look came over Morgana’s face when she heard this.
‘And you would be?’, Merlin asked curiously. Seeing that Morgana was unable to answer, Arthur replied, ‘Err yes, this is Lady Morgana Pendragon, Court Sorceress of Camelot and this is Lady Guinevere. She’s um married to Sir Lancelot.’
‘Ahhh, pleased to meet you’, Merlin grinned and bowed to them. Morgana seemed to have recovered from her strange reaction because she cleared her throat delicately and said seriously, ‘I Saw you.’ Arthur thought that was a strange thing to say seeing as Merlin was standing right in front of them.
‘Ahh, is that so?’, Merlin asked, cocking his head to the side. By now the rest of the knights had also reached them, so they too were witness to the weird exchange happening. Morgana had seemingly forgotten all about her earlier apprehension because she narrowed her eyes and said with a vaguely threatening tone, ‘I’m going to be watching you even if you’re Emrys, so you should be careful.’
‘Of course, my lady’. Merlin inclined his head to her and then smiled briefly.
Apparently satisfied with this answer, she nodded curtly and then turned on her heel and flounced off to terrorise the other occupants of the castle. Arthur had no idea what she did all day and he didn’t want to find out either. He turned to see all the knights and Merlin and Gwen looking at him, so he made a vague excuse about retiring to his chambers and made to leave.
Apparently, the gods were conspiring against him that day because Merlin fell in step beside him. ‘Leave me alone, Merlin’, Arthur muttered. ‘I’ve already talked to Leon. He’ll see that you’re assigned a chamber.’
‘Hmm okay’, Merlin replied. But he continued to walk beside Arthur.
Arthur stopped and turned to him, irritated. ‘Why are you still following me?’
‘Do you ever take a day off from being a prat? I’m your guest. Is this how you treat your guests? You know I’ve heard stories of Camelot and its King. And oh boy, some of them are not pretty.’ Merlin continued to chatter all the way to his chambers, invited himself inside and after surveying Arthur’s chambers, settled at the table and then proceeded to chatter away till supper. All Arthur could do was gape at him and then give up and try to get in a few good comebacks every now and then.
****************
On the day of the feast, Arthur got up feeling surprisingly light. He had to oversee the preparations for it as they would also be lighting the log today in the great hall and he wanted to make sure everything went perfectly. He was nervous because this would be the first year they were using magic for it. When he had asked Morgana she had been ecstatic and had hugged him. Proof that the harpy could show emotion.
Merlin had found him almost immediately when he’d left his chambers. And then proceeded to follow him around and criticize everything he said.
‘Morris, straighten those banners and make sure the red tapestry goes on that wall there’, Arthur had pointed.
‘Are you trying to make sure that the Great Hall looks ugly?’, Merlin had snorted at him. ‘Put it how it was before and whatever you do, do not put the red tapestry there’.
All Arthur could do was huff in frustration. Although Merlin talked constantly and although Arthur pretended (mostly) to be annoyed it was the first time in a long while he hadn’t been thinking about how much he hated winter or how lonely it made him feel. So when it was time to get ready for the feast, and Merlin showed reluctance Arthur had stopped and rolled his eyes at him, ‘What now? Yes, you’re officially invited to the feast, Merlin. What else do you want me to say?’
Merlin glared at him. ‘It’s not that you prat! It’s just well…I can’t show up to the feast in this, can I?’ he said, gesturing to his robe.
‘Oh yes’, Arthur said, sounding surprised. He thought for a while and said, ‘Well no need to be a girl about it. Just borrow one of my old tunics.’
In his chambers, Arthur rummaged through his closet looking for something that would fit Merlin. He pulled out a purple tunic, which could almost be considered new since he’d never worn it. ‘This will fit you, I think.’
‘Thanks, that’s almost decent of you!’, Merlin grabbed the tunic before Arthur could take it back and then disappeared from his chambers. Arthur just shook his head fondly and then frowned at himself for it. Whatever, he needed to get ready for the feast now.
******
Arthur surveyed the Great Hall. Everyone was in high spirits. Before the feast began, they had assembled for the ceremony. Morgana had obtained some books on the Yule rituals from before the Purge (he did not want to know how and he was not going to ask either). She had lit the Yule log with magic and Arthur had wished for a new beginning for Camelot and his reign. He had seen Merlin smiling at him and felt that same funny feeling in his stomach from the forest. Not wanting to look into that too closely he had quickly turned away. Then he had made a small speech and the feast before they dug into the food.
Now, he was a little tipsy, which was far better than the outright drunken state of some of the knights. Gwaine was singing bawdy tavern songs, which was to be expected but shockingly Leon and Elyan had joined him as well. Leon, who never had so much as a hair out of place! Morgana and Gwen were giggling about the Gods knew what. Everyone else seemed to be in the same merry spirits, which Arthur was happy to see. He got up and left the hall wanting a moment to himself. He wandered about till he came upon an open window and stopped there, looking out into the courtyard below. It had started snowing sometime in the middle of the feast. Not long after, he heard footsteps and then Merlin was standing next to him.
Arthur turned to him and then took the opportunity to stare at him. Perhaps if the alcohol had not been present in his system he wouldn’t have done so. Merlin looked at him and smiled, and Arthur helplessly smiled back.
They both looked out at the falling snow. It was quiet and peaceful and Arthur felt as if they were the only people in the world. Not wanting to disturb the atmosphere, he asked quietly, ‘Did you make up the stuff about the wish?’
Merlin laughed softly, ‘Only partially actually.’
Arthur laughed quietly. ‘I knew it’, he said. He looked sidelong at Merlin, ‘Will you tell me now?’
Merlin was silent. Then he grinned ruefully. ‘No, maybe someday though.’
Arthur had expected as much but he was still slightly disappointed. He looked outside and tried to think of something else to say, but suddenly Merlin grabbed his chin and turned him back around. ‘Wha-’
‘Arthur,’, Merlin looked serious and his voice was a little hoarse, ‘I want to kiss you, so if that’s not what you want you should tell me now’. Arthur had no idea where that had come from but in his tipsy state all he could do was nod dazedly and then the next thing he knew was Merlin pulling him closer and kissing him.
The questions could wait for tomorrow. Arthur pressed himself into Merlin and kissed him back.
Recipient: archaeologist_d
Author: marchioness_in
Rating: G
Pairing/s: Merlin/Arthur
Summary: Every year they cut down a yule log for the festival. It's Arthur's first yule as king and he's nervous. Accompanied by the knights this year, as he strikes the tree, it opens up and a man tumbles out.
Warnings: none
Word Count: 4984
Author's Notes: Hey archeologist_d, this is my first time writing something like this so I really hope you like it!
Disclaimer: Merlin is owned by the BBC and Shine. No copyright infringement is intended and no profit is being made. Don't send us to the dungeons.
Of yule logs and magical entities
Winter had to be one of Arthur's least favourite times of the year. It was too cold, the snow made it impossible to train, go hunting or even just step out of the castle. It was also a time everyone when everyone was cooped up inside and spending it with family, and that was when he was reminded more acutely of how alone he was. He had the knights, and Morgana, and Gwen and even Gaius, and he loved them and he knew they loved him but there was an emptiness inside that he couldn’t explain, that had crept up slowly and worsened through the years. It was always worse in this time with nothing to do except occupy himself with his thoughts.
So, when Yule approached he was understandably relieved. They would need a log to burn in honour of midwinter. The log was almost a whole tree and had to be taken from the land, so it was the one day when they ventured out despite the heavy snow and biting cold, to the forest. It was a tradition that Arthur remembered from his childhood and knew had existed long before even his father’s youth. Yule, he had always felt was a little more magical than the other celebrations. His father, whom Arthur had seen to not care much for the more magical traditions, still followed this one. He had instilled in him the importance of choosing the right tree and how it was always the king who had to make the first strike. Arthur, obviously did not know about the more magical connotations of the celebrations but now that magic was no longer illegal he wanted to learn more.
The morning of the day they were to get the log (which had become a tradition unto itself) dawned bright and cold. It had snowed in the night and the whole of Camelot was dusted in white. Arthur dressed in his warmest furs and ate his breakfast hurriedly. He was to join the knights in the entrance hall. He grimaced at the meagre food and thought that they could hunt some game if they found the tree quickly. It would greatly cheer the castle to finally have some meat and would be a fine addition to the feast, which was to be on the morrow.
In the hall, the knights were dressed similarly. Gwaine grinned up at him as he walked towards them. ‘Excited to finally go outside, Princess?’ Now I just know you’ve had too much of being cooped up inside’.
‘I’m not a dog, Gwaine.’, Arthur rolled his eyes.
Gwaine got that twinkle in his eye which spelled nothing good but was stopped from saying anything by Leon hurriedly cutting in. ‘Sire we should get going, we don’t know how long it might take to find a tree and you know it gets dark so quickly these days.’
‘Oh yes, Gwen wouldn’t want us to be out too late in this weather’, Lancelot added and then Percival chimed in with ‘Sire, have you decided what type of tree you want?’ All the knights turned to look at him curiously. Different trees meant different things and it was believed that the tree defined your intentions for the year. His father always chose an oak to symbolise leadership, strength, resilience and endurance.
Arthur had thought long and hard about it. He turned away and said, ‘Yes, I thought we could get a birch this year’. He still wasn’t sure about his choice but a birch stood for fertility, cleansing and new beginnings and Arthur thought it was fitting for his first Yule as monarch. He had long ago decided he was not going to rule like his father, and choosing different intentions would be another way he was determined to deviate. He was still lost in his thoughts when Morgana appeared.
‘You’re looking maudlin’. She smirked at him. ‘Another long night alone in your cups, brother dear?’
Arthur rolled his eyes, ‘Did you come down in all this cold for this Morgana?’.
She scoffed, ‘As if. I know you’re going out to get the Yule tree today. I just wanted to make sure you didn’t accidentally hit your head before even stepping outside the castle’. She attempted to smile innocently at him then. Attempted, because she was a harpy and obviously could never look innocent. She smiled at the knights and added, ‘And dear Gwen wanted to make sure that you were all dressed appropriately. Wouldn’t want any of you falling sick now. There’s only so many whiny brats we can take care of at one time’.
Gwen had drifted over to where Lancelot was standing and was ensuring that he and all the knights were covered properly. At Morgana’s remark, she hid a smile behind her hand and said, ‘We only wanted to wish you well for the day, and since it did snow quite a lot last night I thought I’d make sure you all wore your wools. It’s not that I think you would forget, but well Morgana is right, we can’t have more people falling sick. Not that if you did fall sick we wouldn’t take care of you.’ She smiled sheepishly and then added softly, ‘And well, it's your first Yule as king, so we wanted to wish you well before you left Arthur.’
Arthur cleared his throat and awkwardly thanked her. ‘I’m…We’re grateful, Guinevere. Err…we had better get going now, we don’t how long it might take.’
The knights suppressed smiles, except Gwaine who snorted outright, at his poor acceptance. Well, no matter, it was common knowledge that Arthur didn’t do feelings. He cleared his throat self-consciously again and started towards the door. The knights seemed to get the idea and followed. Just before he stepped out, Morgana called from behind, ‘Arthur, remember not to be your usual arsey self in front of strangers okay?’ and then laughing madly (because again, she was a harpy) took Gwen’s arm and took off into the castle, presumably towards her rooms, leaving him sputtering at the door having not even got in a good rebuttal.
*************************
They rode out of the citadel towards the forest. The snow was not too thick but it was still slow going. The knights chattered behind him, he could hear Gwaine laughing at a joke he’d made himself, and normally he would have joined in but he was anxious then. Arthur would never say it out loud but there was a tiny part of him that was scared he was not going to live up to the precedents set by his father. He knew he was probably overthinking the matter but he couldn’t stop himself.
Arthur stopped his mount near the edge of the forest and turned around, prompting the knights to halt as well. ‘We’ll look around here, I don’t want us venturing too deep into the forest’.
Elyan looked around and seemed to be in thought. ‘There’s a clearing here a few miles north, although I haven’t been there in a while, I remember seeing some up there.’
‘We’ll head there then’, Arthur decided. ‘You’ll lead the way Elyan.’
They followed Elyan and sure enough a while later as they neared the clearing they could see the white trunks of the birches some way ahead. ‘Should we split up Princess?’, Gwaine called out from behind, ‘it’ll be faster, and if someone finds an appropriate tree we can just call out to each other.’
Arthur thought about it. It would be faster to look in pairs rather than as a group. Although he had been itching to go outside for a while, now that he was there he missed the warmth of the castle and especially his chambers. He agreed and said, ‘Okay we’ll split up into pairs, you go with Percival, Elyan and Lancelot can go together and Leon will be with me.’ He turned to Leon and was satisfied when he got a nod in return. Of all of them, Leon was the only one who had accompanied him for one of these earlier. ‘Look for a sturdy tree, it needs to last twelve days. I know it snowed last night but try to find one that’s somewhat dry. Make sure the wood is not rotten and-’
He was cut off by a groan from Gwaine. ‘Gods, Princess I think you can trust us to locate one tree.’
Arthur sighed and said,’ Just don’t go too far.’ Percival and Gwaine took a path towards the right, but not before Gwaine had given him a cheeky wink and a salute.
‘We’ll find a good tree, Sire, don’t worry’, Lancelot said gently. He smiled at Arthur and then rode on towards a path in the centre with Elyan. Arthur and Leon were the only ones standing in the clearing now. Arthur cleared his throat and turned to him. He had paired Leon with himself not only because Leon was his first knight, but also his oldest friend. If there was one person he could talk to about his doubts, it was him.
‘Leon’, he began. ‘I…do you think the birch is the right choice?’ Arthur was surprised, that was not how he had decided to broach the topic.
If Leon was surprised by the question he did not show it. He merely said, ‘If that is what you think is right then I don’t see why not.’
‘But what if….what if the others don’t think so? What if I should have just gone with the oak?’, Arthur asked desperately.
Leon must have understood the underlying message because his face softened. He knew the complicated relationship Arthur had with his father and although he didn’t bring it up, Arthur was sure he had thought of it in that instant. ‘Sire, I know you’ve thought about it a lot and didn’t take the decision lightly. I’m sure everyone will welcome this change.’
The statement spoken softly and so simply was enough to reassure Arthur. He let out a long breath, which fogged in the cold air. He stared at it till it disappeared. He had decided for a reason, and he was going to stand by it. He took another deep breath and then turned to Leon and gave him a half smile. ‘Thank you, Leon.’
Leon smiled back at him. ‘No problem, Sire.’ Then he added, ‘Arthur, you need to believe in yourself. We all do.’ Arthur looked at him for a moment, nodded and then pulled his mount towards the left path.
*************
They were not long on their way when Arthur heard Elyan and Lancelot calling for them. He turned to Leon, and they both turned their mounts towards the clearing.
‘Ah sire, we think we have found the one’, said Lancelot. Gwaine and Pervical rode in from the other direction. Gwaine was pouting. ‘I wanted to be the one to find the tree.’ The knights snorted in amusement at that.
‘I think we’ve found a good one sire.’ Elyan said. Gwaine adopted a sincere expression and began in an earnest tone (or at least Arthur assumed that was what he thought was earnest), ‘But is it tall and sturdy? Will it last the entire twelve days? Is the-oof, Perce, what was that for?’
Percival had elbowed him and was biting back a smile. ‘Leave it, little man. Come on now.’
They tied their mounts in the clearing and began in the direction where Elyan and Lancelot had gone, on foot. Percival carried the two axes they'd brought with them. Arthur wondered how they were going to take the tree back. They had no cart, it was not possible in such weather. The best they could do was tie it behind one or two of the horses and drag it back.
Lancelot and Elyan led them deeper into the forest, and to the tree. It was a good one, neither too tall nor too short. They would be able to bring it down comfortably between them. In past years, Uther had taken a larger party consisting of knights and woodcutters, because oaks were thicker and required more labour. He was sure that people had wondered why he'd chosen such a small group to accompany him but they'd know soon enough.
Arthur gave his nod and then Percival handed him an axe. It wasn’t even such a big thing but to Arthur, it felt like one of the most important things ever. He had a funny feeling in his stomach and holding the axe took a deep breath. He had been obsessing over the choice and now that he was here with the axe in hand it felt realer. The loneliness and the doubts about his rule, the second thoughts on his choice, it all seemed to choke him in that one instant. He wished there was something, someone who could be there in that instant and make it easier for him. He hefted the axe and struck the tree. For a second there was silence and before he could lift it again for the next strike the tree split in two and a man fell out of it.
*********************
Arthur was standing there stunned. His mind still couldn’t quite comprehend what had happened. Around him, the knights seemed to be in a similar state of disbelief. It was Gwaine who recovered first and asked with his characteristic nonchalance, ‘Well then, who might you be?’. He even added in a wink as if this was someone at the tavern and not some man (was he even a man, a mortal like them?) that had come out of a tree!
Arthur looked at the man, as he straightened from the crouch that he had landed in and surveyed them all, ignoring Gwaine’s question. He looked to be about as tall as Arthur himself and had dark curly hair and a not altogether unpleasant face. He was dressed in a dark brown robe. When his gaze stopped at him, Arthur was stunned a second time because something in the man’s gaze went straight to his belly. It was difficult to breathe for a second as the man seemed to stare even harder, drinking in all of him. Then he turned to look at the knights and Arthur could breathe again.
Feeling disoriented, he finally seemed to realise that this was a strange man in the woods with them. He dropped the axe and drew his sword. That seemed to wake the rest of the knights because they too drew their swords, and this time Arthur asked, ‘Answer us, who are you? Where did you come from?’
The man just smiled and said brightly, ‘Oh hey! Yeah, I’m Emrys, but I’d prefer it if you called me Merlin.’ Then he brought his hand up as if to shake Arthur's. Arthur took a hasty step back and shook his sword at this Merlin/Emrys man, ‘Stay back! Where have you come from?’
‘Hmm, a little bit of a prat aren't you?’, Merlin narrowed his eyes at Arthur. Again there was that weird sensation in his belly. Behind him, Gwaine snorted and said gleefully, ‘Ahh that's our Princess for you.’
One of the knights hushed him but Merlin was grinning at him conspiratorially. Arthur cleared his throat loudly and obnoxiously, Merlin turned to him again. He sighed and said, ‘Well I came from the tree obviously’. The audacity of this man! Acting as if Arthur was the one who was insane and not he, the man who had appeared from a tree!
‘You cannot live in a tree.’ Arthur rolled his eyes and said rudely. ‘So did you use magic?’
‘Well obviously’, Merlin began slowly, again acting as if Arthur was the dim one. ‘I don't live in the tree, but because I'm Emrys I'm hmm… sort of connected to all the trees of the forest you know?’
Arthur was sure the knights understood about as much as him which was about nothing, but still, Lancelot ventured hesitantly, ‘But you see we don't know what that means. We don't have much experience with magic.’
Hearing that made Arthur feel a little ashamed even though he knew there was nothing he could have done about it, and a shrewd look came into Merlin's eye. ‘Not much experience with magic huh?’ His gaze seemed to hone in on the red cloaks which everyone and their mother knew were the symbol of Camelot. He must have realised that but he didn't say anything about it. Instead, he put his hands on his hips and said with even more cheer in his voice than before, ‘I'm kind of the leader of the druids, but yeah I have magic so I'm kind of also connected to the forest. You know you can put those swords away now, I’m not here to harm you.’
‘Why are you here anyway, not that I’m complaining’, Gwaine asked. Arthur turned, aghast at the behaviour of his knight, and saw Gwaine grinning at him. He knew Gwaine did this all the time to tease him but he still huffed.
‘Oh yeah, somebody made a wish, so here I am’, Merlin stated proudly. And they were back to square one, where Arthur had no idea what was going on. Honestly, he’d thought they were getting somewhere, what was this about a wish now?
He sighed and put his sword down. Then he rubbed his forehead and said wearily, ‘Now let me get this straight, you’re somebody called Emrys and Merlin, you have magic, you live in a tree and you’re here because somebody made a wish?’
Merlin nodded and went, ‘ Yep, pretty much, although I will say this again, I don’t live in a tree.’ He rolled his eyes and whispered to the knights, ‘Not very bright this one huh’.
Arthur puffed out his chest. ‘Shut up. You can’t talk about me like that. I’m the King of Camelot. And nobody here has made any wishes, so you can go.’
Merlin just shook his head. ‘Nope. I can’t leave till I fulfil it.’
Arthur took another deep sigh. This man was insufferable, never mind that he felt strangely invigorated just arguing with him. ‘Did you not hear me? It shouldn’t be possible with those ears anyway. Nobody. Here. Made. A. Wish. So go away, wherever you came from.’
Merlin looked at him, unimpressed. ‘Gods, you really are an ass.’, he muttered. Then louder he said, ‘And I just told you I can’t leave till I fulfill it yeah. What are you lot doing here, by the way, it's too cold, I thought you’d be shut up in your castles and whatnot.’
‘We’re here to get the Yule log mate’, Gwaine chimed in happily. ‘That tree you came out of was to be the one.’
‘Ahh, it's that time already?’ Great, should I take it down, the axe is just cruel don’t you think.’ He moved to face the tree and lifted his hands.
‘What could a skinny fool like you do?’, Arthur scoffed. Merlin ignored him and closed his eyes. He said a few words and opened his eyes, which flashed gold. Arthur was so mesmerised by the colour that he did not notice how the tree just uprooted itself and lay down in front of them.
‘Um, what-’, he began incoherently but Merlin was already moving past him. He turned to the knights and said, ‘Did you bring horses or carts? Who’s going to carry this? Well, I could float it behind me if you want. Wait, how far is the castle, you do live in a castle right?’
‘Our horses are a little ways down, in the clearing’, Lancelot said.
‘Yeah, Perce and I can lug it till there and then we’ll tie it to the horses.’, Gwaine added.
‘By which you mean I’ll do it alone’, Percival sighed.
‘Now hold on, why didn’t we decide how we were going to carry it back before we left’, Elyan asked sounding baffled.
Arthur spluttered in the background watching how easily his knights were interacting with this mad somewhat attractive stranger. At least, Leon was sensible and stood by him. He turned only to watch Leon walking towards them and saying, ‘Well um if he can float it, won’t that make it easier?’
Arthur stood there slightly bewildered. What on earth had just happened?
********************
They reached the castle much quicker than Arthur had anticipated. Merlin had floated the entire tree behind them and chattered incessantly with Gwaine throughout the ride. Arthur was surprised at how the rest of the knights had also been comfortable enough to join in here and there.
At the castle, there was a mad scramble of grooms rushing about because no one had thought they would be back so soon either. Confused and feeling strange by the encounter Arthur didn’t linger too long with the rest of them. In all the confusion of Merlin appearing they hadn’t even had the chance to hunt something! He gave orders to Leon to take the tree to the Great Hall and to arrange for a chamber for Merlin. While talking to Leon he had seen Merlin laughing with Gwaine and felt an unfamiliar stirring in his stomach. He decided to visit Gaius before retiring to his chambers.
He had just entered the castle when he saw Morgana and Gwen rushing towards him. ‘Arthur, you‘re back so quickly? Is everything alright?’, Morgana asked. Gwen wrung her hands and said, ‘One of the chambermaids saw all the grooms rushing and informed us. Is everyone okay?’
Arthur wondered how he was going to explain what had occurred in the forest. Yes, Morgana was the Court Sorceress but surely even she would find the act of a man appearing from a tree, strange. And how was he to explain the strange man they’d returned with? Said strange man must have had some sixth sense because Arthur heard him shouting his name. He turned to see Merlin running up to him.
Arthur sighed. Of course, it would have been impossible to hide this from Morgana, but he had hoped to delay it for a while. ‘Arthur, who’s this?’, asked Morgana.
Merlin had reached them now and heard the question. He smiled and said, ‘I’m Merlin, but the druids also call me Emrys.’
A strange look came over Morgana’s face when she heard this.
‘And you would be?’, Merlin asked curiously. Seeing that Morgana was unable to answer, Arthur replied, ‘Err yes, this is Lady Morgana Pendragon, Court Sorceress of Camelot and this is Lady Guinevere. She’s um married to Sir Lancelot.’
‘Ahhh, pleased to meet you’, Merlin grinned and bowed to them. Morgana seemed to have recovered from her strange reaction because she cleared her throat delicately and said seriously, ‘I Saw you.’ Arthur thought that was a strange thing to say seeing as Merlin was standing right in front of them.
‘Ahh, is that so?’, Merlin asked, cocking his head to the side. By now the rest of the knights had also reached them, so they too were witness to the weird exchange happening. Morgana had seemingly forgotten all about her earlier apprehension because she narrowed her eyes and said with a vaguely threatening tone, ‘I’m going to be watching you even if you’re Emrys, so you should be careful.’
‘Of course, my lady’. Merlin inclined his head to her and then smiled briefly.
Apparently satisfied with this answer, she nodded curtly and then turned on her heel and flounced off to terrorise the other occupants of the castle. Arthur had no idea what she did all day and he didn’t want to find out either. He turned to see all the knights and Merlin and Gwen looking at him, so he made a vague excuse about retiring to his chambers and made to leave.
Apparently, the gods were conspiring against him that day because Merlin fell in step beside him. ‘Leave me alone, Merlin’, Arthur muttered. ‘I’ve already talked to Leon. He’ll see that you’re assigned a chamber.’
‘Hmm okay’, Merlin replied. But he continued to walk beside Arthur.
Arthur stopped and turned to him, irritated. ‘Why are you still following me?’
‘Do you ever take a day off from being a prat? I’m your guest. Is this how you treat your guests? You know I’ve heard stories of Camelot and its King. And oh boy, some of them are not pretty.’ Merlin continued to chatter all the way to his chambers, invited himself inside and after surveying Arthur’s chambers, settled at the table and then proceeded to chatter away till supper. All Arthur could do was gape at him and then give up and try to get in a few good comebacks every now and then.
****************
On the day of the feast, Arthur got up feeling surprisingly light. He had to oversee the preparations for it as they would also be lighting the log today in the great hall and he wanted to make sure everything went perfectly. He was nervous because this would be the first year they were using magic for it. When he had asked Morgana she had been ecstatic and had hugged him. Proof that the harpy could show emotion.
Merlin had found him almost immediately when he’d left his chambers. And then proceeded to follow him around and criticize everything he said.
‘Morris, straighten those banners and make sure the red tapestry goes on that wall there’, Arthur had pointed.
‘Are you trying to make sure that the Great Hall looks ugly?’, Merlin had snorted at him. ‘Put it how it was before and whatever you do, do not put the red tapestry there’.
All Arthur could do was huff in frustration. Although Merlin talked constantly and although Arthur pretended (mostly) to be annoyed it was the first time in a long while he hadn’t been thinking about how much he hated winter or how lonely it made him feel. So when it was time to get ready for the feast, and Merlin showed reluctance Arthur had stopped and rolled his eyes at him, ‘What now? Yes, you’re officially invited to the feast, Merlin. What else do you want me to say?’
Merlin glared at him. ‘It’s not that you prat! It’s just well…I can’t show up to the feast in this, can I?’ he said, gesturing to his robe.
‘Oh yes’, Arthur said, sounding surprised. He thought for a while and said, ‘Well no need to be a girl about it. Just borrow one of my old tunics.’
In his chambers, Arthur rummaged through his closet looking for something that would fit Merlin. He pulled out a purple tunic, which could almost be considered new since he’d never worn it. ‘This will fit you, I think.’
‘Thanks, that’s almost decent of you!’, Merlin grabbed the tunic before Arthur could take it back and then disappeared from his chambers. Arthur just shook his head fondly and then frowned at himself for it. Whatever, he needed to get ready for the feast now.
******
Arthur surveyed the Great Hall. Everyone was in high spirits. Before the feast began, they had assembled for the ceremony. Morgana had obtained some books on the Yule rituals from before the Purge (he did not want to know how and he was not going to ask either). She had lit the Yule log with magic and Arthur had wished for a new beginning for Camelot and his reign. He had seen Merlin smiling at him and felt that same funny feeling in his stomach from the forest. Not wanting to look into that too closely he had quickly turned away. Then he had made a small speech and the feast before they dug into the food.
Now, he was a little tipsy, which was far better than the outright drunken state of some of the knights. Gwaine was singing bawdy tavern songs, which was to be expected but shockingly Leon and Elyan had joined him as well. Leon, who never had so much as a hair out of place! Morgana and Gwen were giggling about the Gods knew what. Everyone else seemed to be in the same merry spirits, which Arthur was happy to see. He got up and left the hall wanting a moment to himself. He wandered about till he came upon an open window and stopped there, looking out into the courtyard below. It had started snowing sometime in the middle of the feast. Not long after, he heard footsteps and then Merlin was standing next to him.
Arthur turned to him and then took the opportunity to stare at him. Perhaps if the alcohol had not been present in his system he wouldn’t have done so. Merlin looked at him and smiled, and Arthur helplessly smiled back.
They both looked out at the falling snow. It was quiet and peaceful and Arthur felt as if they were the only people in the world. Not wanting to disturb the atmosphere, he asked quietly, ‘Did you make up the stuff about the wish?’
Merlin laughed softly, ‘Only partially actually.’
Arthur laughed quietly. ‘I knew it’, he said. He looked sidelong at Merlin, ‘Will you tell me now?’
Merlin was silent. Then he grinned ruefully. ‘No, maybe someday though.’
Arthur had expected as much but he was still slightly disappointed. He looked outside and tried to think of something else to say, but suddenly Merlin grabbed his chin and turned him back around. ‘Wha-’
‘Arthur,’, Merlin looked serious and his voice was a little hoarse, ‘I want to kiss you, so if that’s not what you want you should tell me now’. Arthur had no idea where that had come from but in his tipsy state all he could do was nod dazedly and then the next thing he knew was Merlin pulling him closer and kissing him.
The questions could wait for tomorrow. Arthur pressed himself into Merlin and kissed him back.