Summer's Day
Author: archaeologist_d
Title: Summer’s Day
Rating: PG-13
Pairing/s: none
Character/s: Gwaine, Gwaine’s mother Anna, Gwaine’s sister Gracia
Summary: On a summer’s day, young Gwaine finds out just what it takes to be a knight and he wants none of it.
Warnings: none
Word Count: 823
Camelot_drabble # 560: “Tell me, what is it you plan to do/with your one wild and precious life?”.
Author’s notes: prompt was from "The Summer Day," by Mary Oliver, one line of dialogue from Gwaine 03x04 by Julian Jones
Disclaimer: I do not own the BBC version of Merlin; They and Shine do. I am very respectfully borrowing them with no intent to profit. No money has changed hands. No copyright infringement is intended.
o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/
It was a summer’s day when Gwaine’s young life came to an end.
Not the winter when his father, Lord Gwyar, died, nor the beginnings of spring when his mother, destitute from King Caerleon’s refusal to grant her any access to their accounts, began to wind her way back into the court by granting favours of an earthy kind to highborne men and sometimes women.
Gwaine had been away, fostered to the Brittany king, learning sword-fighting and courtly manners in equal measure.
So it came as a shock when he returned to find his mother prostituting herself -how else to describe it when she did not honour Gwyar’s memory- in order to glean money and manor houses.
She had gone from simple linen and chastity to velvets and gold thread, her hands dripping with jewels. Well-fed, well-housed, well-whored.
And when he confronted her on it, she slapped his face, her rings cutting him open, but it was her words that struck him to the heart.
“Did you think that honour would be enough, you little fool?” Anna said, her face at once furious and guilt-ridden. “I’m doing this for you and your sister. Did you think I should just slink away and starve? Or send you off into the wilds as a sell-sword? Or bargain Gracia into a marriage with some peasant when she could have a lord or even a duke? I live in the real world and so do you.”
Horrified, he stared at her. “There is no honour in this. How can you live with yourself?”
“I live as I must. And you will accept it if you want to become a knight,” his mother snarled back. “Do you think that knights just snap their fingers and armour magically appears? It takes coin and the king’s agreement to rise in the ranks. For all our sakes, you will shut your mouth and obey me.”
“I will never obey you in this,” Gwaine shouted. “I’ll leave here first. I’ll find my own damn way in the world. Hell, mother, how could you?”
“I did it for you, All you ever talked about was becoming a knight like your father, going off and saving the world like he did. And look where it got us,” she roared back.
Gwaine took a step away from her, not wanted to spend another moment thinking about what she had done for him. The guilt and the fury were driving him mad. “I don’t want this. Not if it costs you so much. I’ll renounce any possibility of knighthood if that’s what it takes for you to stop.”
“Don’t be a fool,” Anna shook her head. “It’s the way things are.”
“If it’s one thing I learned from my father’s life is that titles don’t mean anything. It’s what’s inside that counts.” Taking another step back, looking at her with horror, he knew it was hopeless. “But you don’t see it that way, do you? I have one life to live and this isn’t it.”
“Gwaine, stop and think.” She reached out but he jerked away. Her eyes narrowing, she said, “Tell me, then. What do you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”
He didn’t want this to be the last thing he remembered of his mother. She had nurtured him as a child, been warm and loving, not this hard-hearted stranger. But it would appear that money and desperation made exiles of them all.
“Find someone with honour, someone to believe in. And if not, I’ll drink my way through the entirety of Albion and try to forget that I was ever of noble birth.”
With that, he walked away, then ran when she called out after him.
Grabbing what little coin he had, stealing a horse, he rode away, out of her life and his, and proceeded to consume as much ale as he could.
Fighting, wenching, drunk and lonely, it took a long time for him to find his place in the world again.
But at least, he didn’t buy his knighthood. He earned it, through blood and tears and loyalty to the most honourable man he knew and the king he served.
And that was good enough for Gwaine.
Title: Summer’s Day
Rating: PG-13
Pairing/s: none
Character/s: Gwaine, Gwaine’s mother Anna, Gwaine’s sister Gracia
Summary: On a summer’s day, young Gwaine finds out just what it takes to be a knight and he wants none of it.
Warnings: none
Word Count: 823
Camelot_drabble # 560: “Tell me, what is it you plan to do/with your one wild and precious life?”.
Author’s notes: prompt was from "The Summer Day," by Mary Oliver, one line of dialogue from Gwaine 03x04 by Julian Jones
Disclaimer: I do not own the BBC version of Merlin; They and Shine do. I am very respectfully borrowing them with no intent to profit. No money has changed hands. No copyright infringement is intended.
o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/
It was a summer’s day when Gwaine’s young life came to an end.
Not the winter when his father, Lord Gwyar, died, nor the beginnings of spring when his mother, destitute from King Caerleon’s refusal to grant her any access to their accounts, began to wind her way back into the court by granting favours of an earthy kind to highborne men and sometimes women.
Gwaine had been away, fostered to the Brittany king, learning sword-fighting and courtly manners in equal measure.
So it came as a shock when he returned to find his mother prostituting herself -how else to describe it when she did not honour Gwyar’s memory- in order to glean money and manor houses.
She had gone from simple linen and chastity to velvets and gold thread, her hands dripping with jewels. Well-fed, well-housed, well-whored.
And when he confronted her on it, she slapped his face, her rings cutting him open, but it was her words that struck him to the heart.
“Did you think that honour would be enough, you little fool?” Anna said, her face at once furious and guilt-ridden. “I’m doing this for you and your sister. Did you think I should just slink away and starve? Or send you off into the wilds as a sell-sword? Or bargain Gracia into a marriage with some peasant when she could have a lord or even a duke? I live in the real world and so do you.”
Horrified, he stared at her. “There is no honour in this. How can you live with yourself?”
“I live as I must. And you will accept it if you want to become a knight,” his mother snarled back. “Do you think that knights just snap their fingers and armour magically appears? It takes coin and the king’s agreement to rise in the ranks. For all our sakes, you will shut your mouth and obey me.”
“I will never obey you in this,” Gwaine shouted. “I’ll leave here first. I’ll find my own damn way in the world. Hell, mother, how could you?”
“I did it for you, All you ever talked about was becoming a knight like your father, going off and saving the world like he did. And look where it got us,” she roared back.
Gwaine took a step away from her, not wanted to spend another moment thinking about what she had done for him. The guilt and the fury were driving him mad. “I don’t want this. Not if it costs you so much. I’ll renounce any possibility of knighthood if that’s what it takes for you to stop.”
“Don’t be a fool,” Anna shook her head. “It’s the way things are.”
“If it’s one thing I learned from my father’s life is that titles don’t mean anything. It’s what’s inside that counts.” Taking another step back, looking at her with horror, he knew it was hopeless. “But you don’t see it that way, do you? I have one life to live and this isn’t it.”
“Gwaine, stop and think.” She reached out but he jerked away. Her eyes narrowing, she said, “Tell me, then. What do you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”
He didn’t want this to be the last thing he remembered of his mother. She had nurtured him as a child, been warm and loving, not this hard-hearted stranger. But it would appear that money and desperation made exiles of them all.
“Find someone with honour, someone to believe in. And if not, I’ll drink my way through the entirety of Albion and try to forget that I was ever of noble birth.”
With that, he walked away, then ran when she called out after him.
Grabbing what little coin he had, stealing a horse, he rode away, out of her life and his, and proceeded to consume as much ale as he could.
Fighting, wenching, drunk and lonely, it took a long time for him to find his place in the world again.
But at least, he didn’t buy his knighthood. He earned it, through blood and tears and loyalty to the most honourable man he knew and the king he served.
And that was good enough for Gwaine.