I am declaring jihad.
I once had a Zune that worked perfectly well. Nothing ever went wrong with it. It had better sound quality and, I thought, a better interface than the iPod Nano I'd had before it.
Then I lost it.
So, I bit the bullet and replaced it. I found a good deal on Wal-Mart's Web site: new 8GB Zune and car pack, $100. I paid; they shipped; I received.
The battery couldn't hold a charge for more than a couple hours.
I drove down the road to the Olean Wal-Mart, receipt in hand, and asked to make an exchange. The Olean Wal-Mart does not carry 8GB Zunes. I was not about to return mine then pay another $100+ for a larger one. I don't have that kind of cash. So they told me they could give me a Wal-Mart gift card that I could use on their web site to order a replacement. I paid; they shipped; I received.
The display was intermittently fuzzy, stretched, upside-down, or blank. I waited a week until I was back in Syracuse. I called the Wal-Mart about 20 minutes north of me, and I asked them if they had any 8GB Zunes in stock. They said they did. I brought my busted, brand-new Zune up to them.
"We just ran out of eight-gigs, but the Wal-Mart in East Syracuse might have them. I'll call for you."
He did. He was a nice enough guy, and he was trying to help me out. But I was ready to eviscerate him anyway.
"Turns out they have four left over there. I told them to hold one for you."
Another 20-minute drive over to East Syracuse. The exchange went flawlessly. I dropped the red Zune for a black one - the two nonfunctionals I'd previously picked up from Wal-Mart had been red; my original was black. A good omen, perhaps.
Here I am, not even two months later, with a dead, unresponsive, relatively new Zune sitting on my desk.
Fuck Microsoft.