Hmm...
I'm in a really weird mood right now. I'm being all social, saying things I've meant to say, and adding in random bits of nonsense... I sent something off to Matt (McClintock Matt), whom I won't explain, which I've meant to do for almost a month. And I've been doing random stuff too!!! I made a new dA avatar (dude, it would have been so much cooler if I could have made it bigger...) and I wanted to do that for almost a year...
So that's that. I'm feeling funny. I think this is what happens when you understand the difference and the time and place for responsibility and fun. That was a long sentence.
I really miss school, which is pretty nifty, given the fact that it starts in like... 2 days? Jeez. (Don't worry, I don't think I'll be done soon. I really feel like just... writing something that isn't a story or homework. Y'know?)
I'm going to get to show one of the teachers I look up to the most what I'm capable of. Take it from this perspective- in my freshman year, as an Honors Freshman English student, I managed to stay in his class with 2 C's, a D, and an F. Now, the D alone should have put me on probation for Honors classes, but what really gets me is the fact that the D... Was an F. He moved it up to an D, just to keep me in Honors. And now, right before my Senior year, I think (I believe, is more accurate) that I know how to be responsible. I know how to do what I need to do in order to stop slacking off and get things done. I repeat, Y'know?
I don't know why I'm doing this- it seems like things are finally coming into focus, that I'm finally paying attention; and yet... I sense a nagging fear that this is only a momentary state of mind, that soon enough I will revert into a simple state of egotism requiring me to use my wit to prove myself right- to myself. That I have nothing to prove to anybody else, nor shall I have the desire to. I don't want to do that again, I'm sick of it.
Does anybody else experience this sinking sensation, that the moment they feel the clarity, they are just about to go under again? I think so. I feel that I help many people, even if it's the little things.
Besides Denise, who's going to help me?
So that's that. I'm feeling funny. I think this is what happens when you understand the difference and the time and place for responsibility and fun. That was a long sentence.
I really miss school, which is pretty nifty, given the fact that it starts in like... 2 days? Jeez. (Don't worry, I don't think I'll be done soon. I really feel like just... writing something that isn't a story or homework. Y'know?)
I'm going to get to show one of the teachers I look up to the most what I'm capable of. Take it from this perspective- in my freshman year, as an Honors Freshman English student, I managed to stay in his class with 2 C's, a D, and an F. Now, the D alone should have put me on probation for Honors classes, but what really gets me is the fact that the D... Was an F. He moved it up to an D, just to keep me in Honors. And now, right before my Senior year, I think (I believe, is more accurate) that I know how to be responsible. I know how to do what I need to do in order to stop slacking off and get things done. I repeat, Y'know?
I don't know why I'm doing this- it seems like things are finally coming into focus, that I'm finally paying attention; and yet... I sense a nagging fear that this is only a momentary state of mind, that soon enough I will revert into a simple state of egotism requiring me to use my wit to prove myself right- to myself. That I have nothing to prove to anybody else, nor shall I have the desire to. I don't want to do that again, I'm sick of it.
Does anybody else experience this sinking sensation, that the moment they feel the clarity, they are just about to go under again? I think so. I feel that I help many people, even if it's the little things.
Besides Denise, who's going to help me?