PAYBACK PART 3
Ohey thur :) This is PART 3! Of my epic Sally Mok payback series :) Enjoy?
Title: Misprint
Author: calmingcalamity
Chapter: Drabble
Genre: Angst
Warnings: Angst
Rating: PG
Pairing: None, but it features Uruha and Aoi
Disclaimer: I have Uru and Aoi locked in my closet. They like to fuck during the night.
Synopsis: I feel like I'm the one broken model in the batch
I'm sorry I mess up all the time
I'm sorry I never live up to your expectations
Did you know that sometimes I feel like I'm the only screw up?
The one broken model in the batch
The one who didn't fit the mold
I'm the one letter that ruins the whole page
The one slipped brush stroke that ruins the painting
I don't really belong here - not as long as you don't want me
I'm just a misprint
Title: Odds
Author: calmingcalamity
Chapter: Drabble
Genre: Fluff
Warnings: None
Rating: PG
Pairing: Uruha/Aoi
Disclaimer: I have Uru and Aoi locked in my closet. They like to fuck during the night.
Synopsis: Did you know, according to statistics,the odds of getting hemorrhoids is 25 to 1?
“Hey Uruha. Uruha. Uruha. Uruha. Kouyou. Uruha. Kou. Kou. Kou. Uru. Uru. Takashima. Uru. Uru. Dumb blonde.”
“What?!” the blonde snapped, turning to look at the brunette who was currently tugging at his shirt like a child. “Guess what I learned today?!” the older man chirped happily. Eyes narrowing suspiciously at him, Uruha detached his hand from his shirt. “....what.”
“Did you know that according to statistics, the odds of getting hemorrhoids is 25 to 1?”
….
“What?” Uruha leaned forward, feeling Aoi's forehead for a temperature, “Are you okay?” Annoyed, the brunette smacked his hand away. “Just shut up and let me finish! You're ruining it!” For good measure, he placed a hand over the blonde's mouth, ignoring the glare he was getting from the younger man.
“Did you know that the odds of drowning in a bathtub are 685,000 to 1? Or that the odds of spotting a UFO today are 3,000,000 to 1? Or that the odds of becoming a saint are 20,000,000 to 1? Or that the odds of having down syndrome is-” “Aoi, is there a point to this?” Uruha asked, pulling his hand away. Frowning, Aoi smacked his chest.
“I was going to say something romantic to you but FINE. I guess you don't want to hear it, you jerk! You can sleep on the couch, you dumb blonde!” he snapped, moving to get up. Sighing, Uruha pulled him down, letting him tumble into his lap. He really didn't want to go without sex for any period of time. “Did you know that the odds of me falling in love with you are 1 to 1?” he muttered, lips pressing against Aoi's ear.
“You know,” the brunette muttered, turning to face him, “Being cute does win you points, but you're still not getting any sex tonight.” Pressing a quick kiss against the blonde's lips, he darted away and into the bedroom, slamming the door shut before locking it, leaving Uruha out in the living room dumbfounded.
“What the fuck just happened. WHY AM I THE ONE LOCKED OUT?!”
Title: Belieber
Author: calmingcalamity
Chapter: Drabble
Genre: Crack
Warnings: Excessive Bieber fanboying
Rating: PG
Pairing: Uruha/Aoi
Disclaimer: I have Uru and Aoi locked in my closet. They like to fuck during the night.
Synopsis: WHY CAN'T I BE THAT ONE LESS LONELY GIRL?!
There's gonna be one less lonely girl~
One less lonely girl~
There's gonna be one less lonely girl~
One less lonely girl~
Groaning, Uruha rolled over to grab a pillow and smother himself to death. Where the hell was that HORRENDOUS music coming from? “Aoiiii~” he whined, reaching for his pink-haired lover. His hand met empty space. Where had that mermaid-loving brat gone?
A small sniffling noise reached his ears and he wearily opened his eyes, looking for its source. The noise came again and he managed to locate it to be coming from the floor. Sighing, he rolled over and dropped half of his body over the edge of the bed, looking at Aoi, who was hiding in the corner with the laptop he'd taken from the raven haired man.
“....Aoi? Are you crying?!” Still half asleep, he practically fell out of bed and dragged himself over, cupping Aoi's cheeks in his hand a wiping away his tears. “What's wrong baby?”
“DON'T SAY THAT WORD TO ME!” Aoi shrieked, causing Uruha to fall backwards in shock. “DON'T REMIND ME OF MY PAIN!”
“Aoi what's wrong?!” Uruha asked frantically, trying to fend off the pink-haired man's slaps to his arms, “Stop hitting me you stupid brat!” Instantly, the pink-haired man turned back to the laptop, glaring at Uruha and turning the volume up to full.
How many I told you's~
And start over shoulders~
Have you cried on before~
“Aoi...” Uruha began slowly, “Why....ARE YOU LISTENING TO JUSTIN BIEBER?! DIDN'T YOU SAY I WAS THE BEST?!”
“NO!” he shrieked back, “I LOVE JUSTIN BIEBER THE MOST SO DON'T EVEN, UNLESS YOU WANT TO HAVE NO SEX FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR! TAKE ME TO HIS CONCERT!”
Uruha gaped.
“Are you serious? ARE YOU SERIOUS?! HOW CAN YOU PREFER THAT SINGING FAIRY OVER ME? WHAT EXACTLY IS SO APPEALING?”
Hissing, Aoi stood up and ran off with the laptop, shouting back at Uruha. “HE'S PRETTY, HE CAN SING, HE CAN DANCE! I WANT TO MARRY HIM. TAKE ME TO HIS CONCERT.” Snarling, the raven haired man ran after him, trying to snatch the laptop away and turn off the music that was making his precious ears bleed.
Darting around behind the couch, Aoi stared at the screen. God this was so much better than Spongebob, or Shou. Especially better than Uruha.
“Justin~!” he keened at the image of the 17 year old singing to his adoring fans, “WHY CAN'T YOU MAKE ME YOUR ONE LESS LONELY GIRL?! I WANT TO BE YOUR BABY TOO!! WHY CAN'T I HAVE BEEN BORN A GIRL! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT URUHA!”
“MY FAULT?! WHY THE HELL IS THIS MY FAULT?! AM I NOTHING TO YOU?”
“DON'T EVEN TRY TALKING TO ME UNTIL YOU ARE A BELIEBER YOU STUPID OVERGROWN BARBARIAN! YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS THAT YOU CAN'T SING LIKE HIM!”
Huffing, Uruha sent a deadly glare at the back of his lover.
Oh it was on
A/N: Ne, ne guys. Commennttttttt :) I will give you cookies. And I will also harass you until you comment because it's depressing seeing you stalk my journal silently. Silent reader = sad calmingcalamity.
Title: Misprint
Author: calmingcalamity
Chapter: Drabble
Genre: Angst
Warnings: Angst
Rating: PG
Pairing: None, but it features Uruha and Aoi
Disclaimer: I have Uru and Aoi locked in my closet. They like to fuck during the night.
Synopsis: I feel like I'm the one broken model in the batch
I'm sorry I mess up all the time
I'm sorry I never live up to your expectations
Did you know that sometimes I feel like I'm the only screw up?
The one broken model in the batch
The one who didn't fit the mold
I'm the one letter that ruins the whole page
The one slipped brush stroke that ruins the painting
I don't really belong here - not as long as you don't want me
I'm just a misprint
Title: Odds
Author: calmingcalamity
Chapter: Drabble
Genre: Fluff
Warnings: None
Rating: PG
Pairing: Uruha/Aoi
Disclaimer: I have Uru and Aoi locked in my closet. They like to fuck during the night.
Synopsis: Did you know, according to statistics,the odds of getting hemorrhoids is 25 to 1?
“Hey Uruha. Uruha. Uruha. Uruha. Kouyou. Uruha. Kou. Kou. Kou. Uru. Uru. Takashima. Uru. Uru. Dumb blonde.”
“What?!” the blonde snapped, turning to look at the brunette who was currently tugging at his shirt like a child. “Guess what I learned today?!” the older man chirped happily. Eyes narrowing suspiciously at him, Uruha detached his hand from his shirt. “....what.”
“Did you know that according to statistics, the odds of getting hemorrhoids is 25 to 1?”
….
“What?” Uruha leaned forward, feeling Aoi's forehead for a temperature, “Are you okay?” Annoyed, the brunette smacked his hand away. “Just shut up and let me finish! You're ruining it!” For good measure, he placed a hand over the blonde's mouth, ignoring the glare he was getting from the younger man.
“Did you know that the odds of drowning in a bathtub are 685,000 to 1? Or that the odds of spotting a UFO today are 3,000,000 to 1? Or that the odds of becoming a saint are 20,000,000 to 1? Or that the odds of having down syndrome is-” “Aoi, is there a point to this?” Uruha asked, pulling his hand away. Frowning, Aoi smacked his chest.
“I was going to say something romantic to you but FINE. I guess you don't want to hear it, you jerk! You can sleep on the couch, you dumb blonde!” he snapped, moving to get up. Sighing, Uruha pulled him down, letting him tumble into his lap. He really didn't want to go without sex for any period of time. “Did you know that the odds of me falling in love with you are 1 to 1?” he muttered, lips pressing against Aoi's ear.
“You know,” the brunette muttered, turning to face him, “Being cute does win you points, but you're still not getting any sex tonight.” Pressing a quick kiss against the blonde's lips, he darted away and into the bedroom, slamming the door shut before locking it, leaving Uruha out in the living room dumbfounded.
“What the fuck just happened. WHY AM I THE ONE LOCKED OUT?!”
Title: Belieber
Author: calmingcalamity
Chapter: Drabble
Genre: Crack
Warnings: Excessive Bieber fanboying
Rating: PG
Pairing: Uruha/Aoi
Disclaimer: I have Uru and Aoi locked in my closet. They like to fuck during the night.
Synopsis: WHY CAN'T I BE THAT ONE LESS LONELY GIRL?!
There's gonna be one less lonely girl~
One less lonely girl~
There's gonna be one less lonely girl~
One less lonely girl~
Groaning, Uruha rolled over to grab a pillow and smother himself to death. Where the hell was that HORRENDOUS music coming from? “Aoiiii~” he whined, reaching for his pink-haired lover. His hand met empty space. Where had that mermaid-loving brat gone?
A small sniffling noise reached his ears and he wearily opened his eyes, looking for its source. The noise came again and he managed to locate it to be coming from the floor. Sighing, he rolled over and dropped half of his body over the edge of the bed, looking at Aoi, who was hiding in the corner with the laptop he'd taken from the raven haired man.
“....Aoi? Are you crying?!” Still half asleep, he practically fell out of bed and dragged himself over, cupping Aoi's cheeks in his hand a wiping away his tears. “What's wrong baby?”
“DON'T SAY THAT WORD TO ME!” Aoi shrieked, causing Uruha to fall backwards in shock. “DON'T REMIND ME OF MY PAIN!”
“Aoi what's wrong?!” Uruha asked frantically, trying to fend off the pink-haired man's slaps to his arms, “Stop hitting me you stupid brat!” Instantly, the pink-haired man turned back to the laptop, glaring at Uruha and turning the volume up to full.
How many I told you's~
And start over shoulders~
Have you cried on before~
“Aoi...” Uruha began slowly, “Why....ARE YOU LISTENING TO JUSTIN BIEBER?! DIDN'T YOU SAY I WAS THE BEST?!”
“NO!” he shrieked back, “I LOVE JUSTIN BIEBER THE MOST SO DON'T EVEN, UNLESS YOU WANT TO HAVE NO SEX FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR! TAKE ME TO HIS CONCERT!”
Uruha gaped.
“Are you serious? ARE YOU SERIOUS?! HOW CAN YOU PREFER THAT SINGING FAIRY OVER ME? WHAT EXACTLY IS SO APPEALING?”
Hissing, Aoi stood up and ran off with the laptop, shouting back at Uruha. “HE'S PRETTY, HE CAN SING, HE CAN DANCE! I WANT TO MARRY HIM. TAKE ME TO HIS CONCERT.” Snarling, the raven haired man ran after him, trying to snatch the laptop away and turn off the music that was making his precious ears bleed.
Darting around behind the couch, Aoi stared at the screen. God this was so much better than Spongebob, or Shou. Especially better than Uruha.
“Justin~!” he keened at the image of the 17 year old singing to his adoring fans, “WHY CAN'T YOU MAKE ME YOUR ONE LESS LONELY GIRL?! I WANT TO BE YOUR BABY TOO!! WHY CAN'T I HAVE BEEN BORN A GIRL! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT URUHA!”
“MY FAULT?! WHY THE HELL IS THIS MY FAULT?! AM I NOTHING TO YOU?”
“DON'T EVEN TRY TALKING TO ME UNTIL YOU ARE A BELIEBER YOU STUPID OVERGROWN BARBARIAN! YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS THAT YOU CAN'T SING LIKE HIM!”
Huffing, Uruha sent a deadly glare at the back of his lover.
Oh it was on
A/N: Ne, ne guys. Commennttttttt :) I will give you cookies. And I will also harass you until you comment because it's depressing seeing you stalk my journal silently. Silent reader = sad calmingcalamity.