[For Nick] After Pam's arrival.
It'd taken all of five minutes to completely derail what had been a really nice day. Nice week, even. All Pam Beesly had to do was show up confused on a beach to make that happen.
After leaving Jim with her and carrying Sam along for the long trek back up to the compound, Karen tried to put things in some kind of perspective. The steady thud of her feet on the boardwalk and Sam breathing against her neck were enough to keep her calm as she walked. While Karen wasn't in love with Jim anymore, he was still someone she cared for, and seeing him become a complete mess in less than a second thanks to circumstances neither he nor Pam could control made Karen want to turn right around. But she couldn't do or say anything for him - he had to do that himself, and Karen was pretty sure Pam wouldn't believe anyone but Jim.
The absolute worst, Karen thought, were the what ifs.
What if, one day, Jim was gone like Pam was? They'd finally reached a balanced friendship they could handle, and Karen didn't want months of awkwardness all over again. Let alone what it'd do to poor Sam. And, of course, from there it was easy for her thoughts to stray in more selfish directions; mostly the direction she was currently headed. What if one day it was her? Or Nick? It seemed almost inevitable that one of them would disappear - or if not Nick, then Paige, or Lennox, or any number of friends Karen had. But dwelling on what might happen was no way to live. Even if Karen was pretty damn sure that if Nick disappeared, she wouldn't know what to do with herself.
Karen stopped in her tracks, turning that last thought over. It was the kind of realization she would have loved to have under better circumstances.
"Shit," she whispered to herself, cradling Sam's head as she started walking again, up the ramp to the compound door. "Shit. Sorry, Sammy. Your aunt Karen's having a rough night. Not as bad as daddy, though." Making her way inside, Karen didn't think twice about heading straight for Nick's room. She needed to see him, make sure he was still there, convince herself it wasn't stupid to worry about him disappearing, but that it was to dwell on it. She was stupid about a lot of things, lately.
Sam woke slowly thanks to the general noise of the compound - especially the rec room, and Karen shushed her when she began to fuss and whine. "It's okay, sweetie," she said, soothing Sam. Karen let out a sigh when she reached Nick's room, and knocked. "You're okay. We're gonna get you into bed."
After leaving Jim with her and carrying Sam along for the long trek back up to the compound, Karen tried to put things in some kind of perspective. The steady thud of her feet on the boardwalk and Sam breathing against her neck were enough to keep her calm as she walked. While Karen wasn't in love with Jim anymore, he was still someone she cared for, and seeing him become a complete mess in less than a second thanks to circumstances neither he nor Pam could control made Karen want to turn right around. But she couldn't do or say anything for him - he had to do that himself, and Karen was pretty sure Pam wouldn't believe anyone but Jim.
The absolute worst, Karen thought, were the what ifs.
What if, one day, Jim was gone like Pam was? They'd finally reached a balanced friendship they could handle, and Karen didn't want months of awkwardness all over again. Let alone what it'd do to poor Sam. And, of course, from there it was easy for her thoughts to stray in more selfish directions; mostly the direction she was currently headed. What if one day it was her? Or Nick? It seemed almost inevitable that one of them would disappear - or if not Nick, then Paige, or Lennox, or any number of friends Karen had. But dwelling on what might happen was no way to live. Even if Karen was pretty damn sure that if Nick disappeared, she wouldn't know what to do with herself.
Karen stopped in her tracks, turning that last thought over. It was the kind of realization she would have loved to have under better circumstances.
"Shit," she whispered to herself, cradling Sam's head as she started walking again, up the ramp to the compound door. "Shit. Sorry, Sammy. Your aunt Karen's having a rough night. Not as bad as daddy, though." Making her way inside, Karen didn't think twice about heading straight for Nick's room. She needed to see him, make sure he was still there, convince herself it wasn't stupid to worry about him disappearing, but that it was to dwell on it. She was stupid about a lot of things, lately.
Sam woke slowly thanks to the general noise of the compound - especially the rec room, and Karen shushed her when she began to fuss and whine. "It's okay, sweetie," she said, soothing Sam. Karen let out a sigh when she reached Nick's room, and knocked. "You're okay. We're gonna get you into bed."