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[callmebonnie]

I've been thinking more and more lately about the things that having too much time on your hands bring about. Life, death. Politics, morals. Rules, exceptions. Meaning, survival. Thinking leaves you empty, or hopeless. It's like getting lost in the desert and never knowing if you're heading towards anything. You might get there, but it takes

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[kaitesquill]

That lastline is the first step to trying to figure it out, yes? Asking these big life questions is an amazing and overwhelming thing-- at least it is for me. It makes me feel small and insignificant, but it also puts me in my place. I know I can affect the world on my teeny-tiny scale on a situation by situation basis. We each can. And the amazing thing is if we are all doing it the world will be a much better place. I may sound all buddhist-earthy crunchy-polly anna, but....

I used to be waiting for the right time, a certain situation to make a change in my life. To an extent I still feel that sometimes. But I am trying very hard to live in the now. I've been thinking about my own purpose and spiritual health, and I've realized that what I can do right here and right now is change MY behavior. I like the phrase primal understanding. My thoughts get all crazy and overwhelmed with the magnitude of living and the world and blah blah blah. But I find if I try to silence the constant loop of questions in my head I find a little clarity by focusing on my stuff. Sorry this is so long and rambly. Hope you are well. K~