Jan 25, 2005 18:46
its hard when you're torn
between two different worlds,
one of which is filled with
boredom and despair.
as i watch one person that i will always love
i notice that he's changed.
i different wrapping with the same blue eyes.
its hard knowing that you'll
never have that again;
that you're stuck in a time warp
of lost times and memories,
while the other part of you is
tied down to that voice over the phone.
and the one that spreads lies
about how you fucked up,
and claims to know how you feel,
that one continues to play the martyr.
i'm not quite sure how this went
"out the window"
how i flushed it all away
i never meant to hurt anyone
i never meant to fuck it up.
this remorse is eating me alive.
i wish i could glue it back together,
but how would i hide the cracks
and chipped pieces?
how would i mend the leaks in the
shit platter made of gold?
i wish i could tell all the ones that i love
how i know i'm the bad guy,
i know i can't fix it.
but once again i have that run-down
quote
playing over and over and over
again
the same old message i should take into consideration;
"the one you love and the one who loves you are never, EVER, the same person."
but i keep trying.
and i'll never give up.
someday someone will listen to me.
if i showed a little effort,
i'd guilt trip you to death.
i'm that creepy kid you see everyday,
that one who hides behind walls at school.
that one who you catch staring through people,
just so i can see what you've become.
you know, that girl who you used to care about.
that girl who still loves you,
even through the shit you pile on yourself.
are you trying to please your cheerleader friend?
or is it the druggie who beats his own girlfriend?
are those the role models you look up to now-a-days?
do you only hate me because SHE told you to?
at least i try.