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May 31, 2012 23:36


I've been writing a lot lately. It feels so good, since I haven't written for pure enjoyment, for the simple love of words, in the longest time. It's so amazing, seeing your words appear in a document, typing your vision out, seeing it come to life. I had forgotten what a high it could give you, how the inspiration floodgates can just spring open and all these ideas come pouring out of you and all you want to do is write, write, write, all the time.

It's a more intense version of the feeling I get when I read a really good book and I don't want to stop reading. I might love reading more than most other things in this life, but there's something about writing. I don't know what it is, but I feel so whole, so complete, when I'm writing something I really love.

For example, I recently wrote a Damon/Elena (The Vampire Diaries) fic. I was a little rusty at first, since I haven't written fiction for such a long period of time, but after a while, the words started coming. And I decided to stretch my skill. My short angsty one-shot became a 5K, M-rated fic -- something I had never attempted before. I reckon that the sex was not as good as it could have been, since it's only my first attempt at doing anything remotely like it, but it's better than 95% of the stuff out there. For my first try, it worked. I was pleased with myself, and it's gotten good feedback so far.

Then that story opened up all sorts of other ideas.

Now I am stretching my skill once again, trying to write a character I actually despise (Stefan from TVD), but I feel like I understand him. And he won't get out of my head. He's demanding that his story is told, and it's been a long time since I've had a character speak to me with such an earnest, demanding voice.

Feels good. I might complain, because darn it all, I HATE STEFAN and everyone in fandom knows it, but the mark of a good writer is being able to put yourself in the shoes of someone you might not particularly care for and make them sympathetic. It's important to make them sympathetic even in your own eyes, to bring them to life in a way that maybe even the show didn't. That's why I'm actually glad I'm writing this story. I've stretched my talent more in the past few days than I have in this entire school year.

Who says fanfic doesn't have its perks? Hee.

*

Speaking of school. Next week is finals. On June 12th, I will officially be a high school graduate. So excited/nervous. I just know that, the minute I leave the school after graduation that night, I am never going back. I can't wait to start the next stage in my life.

I'm not sure what I'm gonna do, though. My English teacher suggested that I go into political science, because it is a humanities-related field that pays decently enough, and that's not the case for journalism and English, the two other majors I was considering. I would not become a high-profile politician, that's for sure, but there are lots of other jobs I can get with a political science degree. I'm teasing it around in my mind, and it seems more appealing the more I think about it.

Luckily, I still have four years left to figure it out. Most likely, I will do research about it over the summer.

*

I got bored with Doomsday Book, because I feel like nothing has really happened in over 200 pages. It's written well enough, and I love the edge of dry, sardonic humor. The world-building is great, but it just drags on and on and oonnnnnn. It's like, get to the action already!

So I'm going to put it aside for now. I'll probably pick it up again at some point when I'm bored.

*

Anyway, how's everyone else?
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