this girls off to bed-again
There are some people who no matter how hard you try and how much you forget,grow and learn, continue to chip away at all the walls you built around urself. I see the day to day stuff and the shit you deal with from ppl but its like, your still there.always fucking there. the difference is that i dont care apart from this tapping in my head going "clare..ur alone..and im gona laugh at you..and pretend that i care...but everyones alone so it doesnt matter..just noone cares about it as much as you do cos u SUCK"
I DONT suck and i DO need to get off the drugs.
NO wait.its noone buisness.its mine but what the hell maybe its everybodys when im not looking after myself.
i rely on my mother. not my freinds or bf but my mother and now she "cant trust me" shes got hormones all over the place but who am i ment to turn to now?
i feel like crying. im not gonna but u no wen u jus wana break down cos u put all ur eggs in one basket (excuse the phrase). its like i put em all in a couple baskets. medication and my mumma and i get it shoved in my face by different earthly little matters that show me im a fool for thinking i could and being so needy.
its not selfpitying.its i realise what im like, and im really damn needy, ive always been just lied to myself.and after tonite wen ive missed a few days pills and im back on them agen il think "psssh sad little cunt,shes just being moody" no clare! ur not being moody. this is the real u, not sum emotionaly starved medical stastic who actualy doesnt care until she gets angry.
what am i turning into?
I DONT suck and i DO need to get off the drugs.
NO wait.its noone buisness.its mine but what the hell maybe its everybodys when im not looking after myself.
i rely on my mother. not my freinds or bf but my mother and now she "cant trust me" shes got hormones all over the place but who am i ment to turn to now?
i feel like crying. im not gonna but u no wen u jus wana break down cos u put all ur eggs in one basket (excuse the phrase). its like i put em all in a couple baskets. medication and my mumma and i get it shoved in my face by different earthly little matters that show me im a fool for thinking i could and being so needy.
its not selfpitying.its i realise what im like, and im really damn needy, ive always been just lied to myself.and after tonite wen ive missed a few days pills and im back on them agen il think "psssh sad little cunt,shes just being moody" no clare! ur not being moody. this is the real u, not sum emotionaly starved medical stastic who actualy doesnt care until she gets angry.
what am i turning into?