Trip Report
"Becks Ranch" cave is a cave of choices. At the very beginning you can choose to go the hard way, or the easy way. Now mind you if you choose to go the right way, that is the hard way, and not necessarily the right way. Being a man of great bravery and poor judgment, I went the hard way. Mind you I had been in this cave before, I had gone the hard way, and I by all logic should have been able to remember the wonders that awaited us. "Oh it's not really that bad, just really muddy," I told to one unsuspecting novice caver.
Rock has an odd sense of humor. When you say something along the lines of, "oh it's no that bad," the rock hears you. I know this sounds crazy, but that's about the only way I can explain that cave's numerous attempts to destroy my testicles.
Actual dialog in the cave:
: Oh my god, my balls! I think the rock just tried to rip them off!
Sparky: Yeah, it does that. Look at it this way, you won't need a visectomy later on in life.
:
Oh no baby! I wanted to have FOUR kids!
Sparky: Well you better get started, I don't think you have much time left, just you know, be quiet about it over there somewhere.
Caving really is a female sport, because mother nature likes hurting men. Now mind you it is possible to lose a nipple in a cave I've been told, and more than a few girls have yelled "oh son of a bitch my mammary!" or some derivation there of. That being said, caves are equal to both men and women in this case, as my friend the Captain can attest to, having lost his third nipple repeatedly while caving.
In short, the cave was a freakin blast, but I don't think I'll be going that way again, having enjoyed it twice already. And the bats got pissed off. I hate pissing off bats.
Calledor Out.
Rock has an odd sense of humor. When you say something along the lines of, "oh it's no that bad," the rock hears you. I know this sounds crazy, but that's about the only way I can explain that cave's numerous attempts to destroy my testicles.
Actual dialog in the cave:
: Oh my god, my balls! I think the rock just tried to rip them off!
Sparky: Yeah, it does that. Look at it this way, you won't need a visectomy later on in life.
:
Oh no baby! I wanted to have FOUR kids!
Sparky: Well you better get started, I don't think you have much time left, just you know, be quiet about it over there somewhere.
Caving really is a female sport, because mother nature likes hurting men. Now mind you it is possible to lose a nipple in a cave I've been told, and more than a few girls have yelled "oh son of a bitch my mammary!" or some derivation there of. That being said, caves are equal to both men and women in this case, as my friend the Captain can attest to, having lost his third nipple repeatedly while caving.
In short, the cave was a freakin blast, but I don't think I'll be going that way again, having enjoyed it twice already. And the bats got pissed off. I hate pissing off bats.
Calledor Out.