Do not fret, I have not forgotten about the devil in love
take two!
or, JAPAN DOES TWILIGHT. I'm just going to run out and get some popsicles, and then I'll be back to liveblog. AND DONE.
Look! Who says I can't use what I learned from korean dramas in real time?
oh, and I almost forgot. I'm going to be in NY July 30-August 5 (flying in on the 29th) to see my BFF and other friends I've known since HS, and I know cynicalism and I are going to attempt a second meetup (seeing how she's going to be on MY side of the country a few days before). I haven't been back to NY since I was an adult (with the exception of the 2007 Eurofiesta), so if anything's cool or changed since then - that I should go see, please let me know?
I'm planning on stopping by Muji. ^__^
We open up with a scene underneath a giant full moon, on a rooftop, and a woman gets bitten on the neck by some vampire who has a NEFARIOUS LAUGH. It's all very Phantom of the Opera.
Enter the Boy in Black - close up on his brown eyes - and he zeroes in on an innocent looking school girl, played by Nanami Sakuraba. She's mildly perplexed by this hoodie wearing stranger - as is her cellphone wielding friend, who snaps a picture of the boy on his cell.
The picture....does not show up and instead turns up another classmate who is late to class.....DUNH DUNH DUH.
Hoodie walks the streets of Tokyo, stalking-er, stepping on flowers, babies in strollers stare at him quizzically, small dogs stop barking when he passes by....and AN EMO CLOUD OF FORESHADOWING COVERS TOKYO.
Rosa Kato flails and freaks out over thunder and ends up not-hugging Kyo Nobuo (Oscar! from Hana Kimi!) who is pleased by the contact because of course he has a little crush on Kato-sensei.
Hoodie stands in the rain and mutters Seimasen to himself while being scratched by passer bys on inconsiderate bicycles.
A thing that Hoodie likes to do? Is sit on railings and stare out into the distance MEANINGFULLY. Or maybe he's bored. It's hard to tell with this boy.
Kato-sensei thinks he's about to commit suicide, because what NORMAL person sits on a railing on a bridge in the rain? CLEARLY ONLY A SUICIDAL PERSON.
She's so surprised by his appearance, that her red umbrella gets blown away!
Hoodie and her exchange words, he slinks off, and creepy vampire guy from the beginning picks up Kato-sensei's discarded red umbrella.
and...Credits!
Stock moon, goth images!
Hoodie's first day at school - and the hood is up and his wound from before is completely gone! Kato-sensei indulges in some overly friendly/invasive searching -- listen, hasn't it been pounded into my head through millions of Jdramas that PERSONAL SPACE IS A BIG THING? So Kato-sensei is getting kind of INAPPROPRIATELY HANDY.
Hoodie exchanges glances with Nanami, and all the other girls in the class immediately lock in on the DO NOT SPEAK TO ME OR LOOK AT ME AURA of the new boy and fall in love. Because teenage girls! They love jerks! I'm sorry, bad boys. He's so unattainable and dreamy and sullen and looks good in black!
Hoodie is forced to sit in a sunlit spot, and immediately flinches - and then, lo and behold, the pilfered red umbrella from earlier makes an appearance. Kato-sensei apparently does not recognize her own umbrella or why Hoodie has it - but it's a hilarious moment when he sits in the sunshine with the umbrella, looking incredibly pained.
Nanami explains maybe Hoodie just wants to protect himself from the UV rays -- the next class, he's sitting next to her.
The girls stalk Hoodie through the halls and he manages to avoid them by going into the boy's restroom, where Creepy Old Vampire is waiting -- and checks his teeth. Like he's some prize horse, or something. Because in case all the LITTLE HINTS so far - paleness, rudeness, random staring by babies - hoodie? Is a teenage vampire.
And he hasn't got his fangs yet.
And he also plays the piano. Beautifully.
I think I shall call him Lestat.
Lestat goes home with his umbrella of conspiciousness and his fanclub follows behind - it really is just like all those shoujo mangas! If you're vaguely attractive and cold, girls will FALL ALL OVER THEMSELVES to get close to you!
Lestat is apparently living with a family who runs a gyoza restaurant (HEAVEN.), and they use a lot of garlic. Lestat looks like hes' about to hurl.
He flops back on his bed and flashbacks to Creepy Encounter in the Boy's Restroom. If only I could have my fangs so I could be a REAL vampire, he laments.
In another pointless flashback to something that happened FIVE MINUTES AGO, Rosa sits in her singleton apartment and thinks in soft fuzzy focus about the Piano Playing Teenage Boy she shouldn't be Paying Attention to, because HI, THAT WAY LIES MARY K LETOURNEAU (google it, children.)
Lestat is woken up by his aggressively cheerful morning family - they do calisthenics together in matching track bottoms and the look of disgust Lestat gives them...well, you know, Lestat's just not a team player. Though I find it difficult to be scornful and unresponsive whilst wearing bright orange crocs, but apparently, Lestat hates everything.
He pokes listlessly at his eggs and the camera pans in meaningfully at his complete breakfast.
While walking to school, he keeps on veering off course and staring at women's necks and women in general - and then feeling for his non-existent fangs. Welcome everyone, to the world of drama-logic! Where stalking almost always equals TRUE LOVE, and a boy with an oral fixation who STARES and smells girl's necks is a teenage heartthrob. Oh, Japan. Never change.
Lestat meets up with Nanami, who is...his Mina Harker? I really have no idea what her role is, other than to be a red herring for the 'OTP' of the show, which is Kato-sensei and Lestat. Anyway, she's too nice for creep boy - and as they're walking, the side of the building CONVENIENTLY falls and just as Lestat is about to grab her for an attack - he manages to cover her from the brunt of the building boards.
How very EDWARD of you, Lestat!
Nanami takes him back to the infirmary and then the crazy hijinks begin (yes, I know begin as opposed to hasn't this entire episode just been full of CRAZY?) because one of the fangirls comes in and Lestat takes her hand immediately and draws the curtains behind them. Nanami, who has been tending to his wound, is naturally bewildered and WTF? I'm STILL IN THE ROOM, YOU HORNDOG.
She flees, and proving there is no honor between schoolgirls in love, her classmate prepares to be ravished by Lestat - and her seduction scene plays more like....creepy teenage boy who is sniffing her neck and trying to bite it - BUT WOE, I AM IMPOTENT.
Oh come on. Fangs haven't arrived. Looking for the 'right' girl. Choosing any girl, just to see. I DON'T THINK I NEED TO EXPLAIN THE METAPHOR FOR YOU.
Kato-sensei arrives on the scene to find out if her student is seroiusly hurt, and has to bypass the fangirl army, who are literally swooning. She bursts in, and finds Lestat about to put the bite on another girl - which she thwarts. When she asks him, WTF ARE YOU DOING, THIS IS JAPAN - he says flatly, I'm looking for the woman of my DESTINY.
Is that what the kids are calling it now?
Back to Creepy Lair, Inc. Lestat talks to old Vampire Guy, who has thoughtfully brought his snack bar - I'm sorry, his woman of destiny back into his room, nude and asleep. I'm sure they have scintillating conversations about the weather and the stock market, but let's go down the obvious route and say that Snack bar is there for blood and sex.
Kato-sensei pays Lestat a home visit and gets drunk and talks to his host family about stuff. Did I mention she gets DRUNK?
Really, she is no Yankumi.
There is a tense moment where Lestat rips off his bandage, and BEHOLD, I HAVE NO SCAR. DO I NOT DAZZLE YOU? BEGONE FROM MY SIGHT, ANNOYING WOMAN.
Lestat skulks off into the night and sits on a building and drinks grape/prune juice moodily. Yes, grape juice. And then casually self-harms. Just to see his blood.
HIS ANGST, CAN YOU NOT FEEL IT?
And then he ruins the moment by trying to make a fanged expression.
Blah blah blah Creepy Lair Inc.
Kato-sensei stumbles back home and falls off her bed.
OMG, THERE ARE CAPES IN THE FULL MOON - transition.
A gang of girls herd Lestat into a corner so one of them can give him a love letter - he drops it on the ground, and Oscar-sensei calls him out for littering.
Kato-sensei tries to talk to him, he calls her on the drunken shenanigans and also, lady, you kind of reek.
This boy is full of charm and DELIGHT, I say.
The previous night before, Oscar-sensei tried to ask Kato-sensei out on a date various times through her phone -...but she was busy getting drunk, so, mortification all around.
Nanami tries to get the homeroom's attention - she's the class representative, it seems, and is passing out sheet music.
Here comes one of my favorite WTF moments - there's a cross printed on the paper, and when Lestat sees the cross, he totally freaks out and knocks the papers out of her hand.
That's right. A PRINTED CROSS. TOTAL FAIL VAMPIRE.
Even EDWARD is cooler than Lestat, Jr. AND THAT IS A LOT OF FAIL.
Anyway, he's curt and dismissive to Nanami, cementing his total jackass personality in my mind - and the other boy (read: cog in the inevitable love triangle, rectangle) tries to punch him in the face, only Lestat has SUPER CRAZY REFLEXES and can avoid every punch at will.
A huge pointless ruckus erupts in the class, Nanami's in tears, everyone is wildly overexcited for such a little thing (seriously) and Lestat books it. Kato-sensei comes in and settles everyone down - and Lestat flees the scene. Because he's a leaver, a heartbreaker, you see.
I ffed a bunch of Sensei-scenes, she ruins a date with Oscar sensei because she's out looking for Lestat, Lestat breaks a mirror with his incredible Boy Pain, and OOPS, ANOTHER FAILED SUICIDE ATTEMPT-MEETCUTE. Oh, and somewhere before that, Kato-sensei slaps Lestat in the face while soft tinkling piano music plays mournfully in the background.
He walks away sullenly, swinging his stolen red umbrella.
But yes, back to the second failed suicide attempt meet cute - Kato sensei sees Lestat standing by the dock moodily and jumps to the conclusion that OH NOES, HE'S GOING TO JUMP, and flings herself at him --only, he's just standing there. And her heel decides at that climatic event to snap, and she naturally falls over the side of the dock, taking him with her ---
cue flashback and another time --- AND OHO. LESTAT IS THE DEAD RINGER FOR HER FIRST LOVE (who presumably was not a vampire because he was out in daylight - and apparently drowned while trying to rescue someone in the ocean) and you know Kato-sensei is younger in this flashback because she's wearing a sailor fuku and has BANGS.
I LOVE YOU, CONSISTENCY DEPARTMENT. NEVER CHANGE.
Anyway, in a bit of gratuitous wet-shirt moment, Kato-sensei stands in the bay and laughs to herself for no reason (I think this is supposed to illustrate that she's light hearted and joyful, but I can't help but think that Kato-sensei is a bit...dim.) as Lestat stands in the water with his umbrella looking on confused - and then pained, because, oh oh, what's this? HIS FANGS HAVE DESCENDED.
DUNH DUNH DUNH.
Next episode: the path to the woman of his destiny is never smooth as Lestat breaks into Nanami's room while she's in her pajamas, and then attempts to ask her for her notes on English predicates...no, he bites her. Or does some of his magic neck sniffing again. I AM VERY CONFUSED. Is this woman of destiny really just a PICK UP LINE, or now that the fangs are in, he can bite whomever he wishes?
Anyway, Nanami needs a rape whistle.
As does Kato-sensei, because the CHANGE comes upon Lestat in the piano room and he kind of half-hugs, half-lunges at her. Oh, thrilling romance.
And why are there no girl vampires?
THIS IS THE NEW FACE OF ROMANCE
...bwuh?
forget you, I need to go skulk in the shadows.
DON'T FORGET. NEW FACE OF ROMANCE.
DO I NOT DAZZLE YOU, BRIEF MORTALS? I DAZZLE EVEN MYSELF.
Just another day in the boy's bathroom.
No, you must not chase the girls...and suck their blood.
Hi red herring love interest! You look very pretty today!
Have I got my teeth in yet? Do you think my fangs make my face look fat?
If you were a girl, I'd kill you in your sleep. Then again....
I can hear her heartbeat.
Yes?
This scene, with the following camera and the music? Totally STALKER.
Just when you thought it was safe to go back to school.....
I'm going to suck you dry.
Pardon?
Oh, nothing. Hey did you see that bird?
What - OMG THE BUILDING IS GOING TO FALL ON US.
I'll save you, Bella!
Wrong movie - also, this is not quite on par with saving me from a TRAIN.
Your neck looks tasty in this light.
CURSES. Fangs. Can't. Extend.
I'm sure it happens all the time....
Shush, snack bar. I am trying to put you in my THRALL.
Oh damn it. I'll just have to try later.
Okay, that was kind of *$%@Q%! weird.
YOU HOOR.
Dear diary, today at school, I got ravished by the new boy! It was so AWESOME.
For your information, Sensei--
THIS SKIN. IS THE SKIN OF A KILLER. LOOK UPON MY FLAWLESS GLORY, PEASANT.
Huh, I think I see a zit forming - 'oourse, this could be the alcohol talking.
Grape juice. Not exactly the drink of vampires.
Woe. My life sucks.
Come ON, WHEN ARE MY FANGS GOING TO COME IN.
I've got 99 problems...and a red umbrella.
STAY CLASSY, JAPAN.
OH MY GOD. THE REMARKABLE COINCIDENCES, THEY JUST KEEP HAPPENING.
a fountain! it has magically erupted from the bay!
Yeah, that's not the only thing that's erupted.
what is this feeling?
THE FANGS HAVE DESCENDED. YOU HAVE FOUND YOUR WOMAN OF DESTINY!
NO WAY.
next time on As the Fang Turns,
Ruka (yes, I decided to use his actual name.) has an embarrassing moment in the piano room.
I'M IN YOUR BEDROOM, HAUNTING YOUR DREAMS.
look into my eyes.....
Does this mean we're going steady now?
Alas, no, Nanami. You are only the appetizer in his banquet of love.
or, JAPAN DOES TWILIGHT. I'm just going to run out and get some popsicles, and then I'll be back to liveblog. AND DONE.
Look! Who says I can't use what I learned from korean dramas in real time?
oh, and I almost forgot. I'm going to be in NY July 30-August 5 (flying in on the 29th) to see my BFF and other friends I've known since HS, and I know cynicalism and I are going to attempt a second meetup (seeing how she's going to be on MY side of the country a few days before). I haven't been back to NY since I was an adult (with the exception of the 2007 Eurofiesta), so if anything's cool or changed since then - that I should go see, please let me know?
I'm planning on stopping by Muji. ^__^
We open up with a scene underneath a giant full moon, on a rooftop, and a woman gets bitten on the neck by some vampire who has a NEFARIOUS LAUGH. It's all very Phantom of the Opera.
Enter the Boy in Black - close up on his brown eyes - and he zeroes in on an innocent looking school girl, played by Nanami Sakuraba. She's mildly perplexed by this hoodie wearing stranger - as is her cellphone wielding friend, who snaps a picture of the boy on his cell.
The picture....does not show up and instead turns up another classmate who is late to class.....DUNH DUNH DUH.
Hoodie walks the streets of Tokyo, stalking-er, stepping on flowers, babies in strollers stare at him quizzically, small dogs stop barking when he passes by....and AN EMO CLOUD OF FORESHADOWING COVERS TOKYO.
Rosa Kato flails and freaks out over thunder and ends up not-hugging Kyo Nobuo (Oscar! from Hana Kimi!) who is pleased by the contact because of course he has a little crush on Kato-sensei.
Hoodie stands in the rain and mutters Seimasen to himself while being scratched by passer bys on inconsiderate bicycles.
A thing that Hoodie likes to do? Is sit on railings and stare out into the distance MEANINGFULLY. Or maybe he's bored. It's hard to tell with this boy.
Kato-sensei thinks he's about to commit suicide, because what NORMAL person sits on a railing on a bridge in the rain? CLEARLY ONLY A SUICIDAL PERSON.
She's so surprised by his appearance, that her red umbrella gets blown away!
Hoodie and her exchange words, he slinks off, and creepy vampire guy from the beginning picks up Kato-sensei's discarded red umbrella.
and...Credits!
Stock moon, goth images!
Hoodie's first day at school - and the hood is up and his wound from before is completely gone! Kato-sensei indulges in some overly friendly/invasive searching -- listen, hasn't it been pounded into my head through millions of Jdramas that PERSONAL SPACE IS A BIG THING? So Kato-sensei is getting kind of INAPPROPRIATELY HANDY.
Hoodie exchanges glances with Nanami, and all the other girls in the class immediately lock in on the DO NOT SPEAK TO ME OR LOOK AT ME AURA of the new boy and fall in love. Because teenage girls! They love jerks! I'm sorry, bad boys. He's so unattainable and dreamy and sullen and looks good in black!
Hoodie is forced to sit in a sunlit spot, and immediately flinches - and then, lo and behold, the pilfered red umbrella from earlier makes an appearance. Kato-sensei apparently does not recognize her own umbrella or why Hoodie has it - but it's a hilarious moment when he sits in the sunshine with the umbrella, looking incredibly pained.
Nanami explains maybe Hoodie just wants to protect himself from the UV rays -- the next class, he's sitting next to her.
The girls stalk Hoodie through the halls and he manages to avoid them by going into the boy's restroom, where Creepy Old Vampire is waiting -- and checks his teeth. Like he's some prize horse, or something. Because in case all the LITTLE HINTS so far - paleness, rudeness, random staring by babies - hoodie? Is a teenage vampire.
And he hasn't got his fangs yet.
And he also plays the piano. Beautifully.
I think I shall call him Lestat.
Lestat goes home with his umbrella of conspiciousness and his fanclub follows behind - it really is just like all those shoujo mangas! If you're vaguely attractive and cold, girls will FALL ALL OVER THEMSELVES to get close to you!
Lestat is apparently living with a family who runs a gyoza restaurant (HEAVEN.), and they use a lot of garlic. Lestat looks like hes' about to hurl.
He flops back on his bed and flashbacks to Creepy Encounter in the Boy's Restroom. If only I could have my fangs so I could be a REAL vampire, he laments.
In another pointless flashback to something that happened FIVE MINUTES AGO, Rosa sits in her singleton apartment and thinks in soft fuzzy focus about the Piano Playing Teenage Boy she shouldn't be Paying Attention to, because HI, THAT WAY LIES MARY K LETOURNEAU (google it, children.)
Lestat is woken up by his aggressively cheerful morning family - they do calisthenics together in matching track bottoms and the look of disgust Lestat gives them...well, you know, Lestat's just not a team player. Though I find it difficult to be scornful and unresponsive whilst wearing bright orange crocs, but apparently, Lestat hates everything.
He pokes listlessly at his eggs and the camera pans in meaningfully at his complete breakfast.
While walking to school, he keeps on veering off course and staring at women's necks and women in general - and then feeling for his non-existent fangs. Welcome everyone, to the world of drama-logic! Where stalking almost always equals TRUE LOVE, and a boy with an oral fixation who STARES and smells girl's necks is a teenage heartthrob. Oh, Japan. Never change.
Lestat meets up with Nanami, who is...his Mina Harker? I really have no idea what her role is, other than to be a red herring for the 'OTP' of the show, which is Kato-sensei and Lestat. Anyway, she's too nice for creep boy - and as they're walking, the side of the building CONVENIENTLY falls and just as Lestat is about to grab her for an attack - he manages to cover her from the brunt of the building boards.
How very EDWARD of you, Lestat!
Nanami takes him back to the infirmary and then the crazy hijinks begin (yes, I know begin as opposed to hasn't this entire episode just been full of CRAZY?) because one of the fangirls comes in and Lestat takes her hand immediately and draws the curtains behind them. Nanami, who has been tending to his wound, is naturally bewildered and WTF? I'm STILL IN THE ROOM, YOU HORNDOG.
She flees, and proving there is no honor between schoolgirls in love, her classmate prepares to be ravished by Lestat - and her seduction scene plays more like....creepy teenage boy who is sniffing her neck and trying to bite it - BUT WOE, I AM IMPOTENT.
Oh come on. Fangs haven't arrived. Looking for the 'right' girl. Choosing any girl, just to see. I DON'T THINK I NEED TO EXPLAIN THE METAPHOR FOR YOU.
Kato-sensei arrives on the scene to find out if her student is seroiusly hurt, and has to bypass the fangirl army, who are literally swooning. She bursts in, and finds Lestat about to put the bite on another girl - which she thwarts. When she asks him, WTF ARE YOU DOING, THIS IS JAPAN - he says flatly, I'm looking for the woman of my DESTINY.
Is that what the kids are calling it now?
Back to Creepy Lair, Inc. Lestat talks to old Vampire Guy, who has thoughtfully brought his snack bar - I'm sorry, his woman of destiny back into his room, nude and asleep. I'm sure they have scintillating conversations about the weather and the stock market, but let's go down the obvious route and say that Snack bar is there for blood and sex.
Kato-sensei pays Lestat a home visit and gets drunk and talks to his host family about stuff. Did I mention she gets DRUNK?
Really, she is no Yankumi.
There is a tense moment where Lestat rips off his bandage, and BEHOLD, I HAVE NO SCAR. DO I NOT DAZZLE YOU? BEGONE FROM MY SIGHT, ANNOYING WOMAN.
Lestat skulks off into the night and sits on a building and drinks grape/prune juice moodily. Yes, grape juice. And then casually self-harms. Just to see his blood.
HIS ANGST, CAN YOU NOT FEEL IT?
And then he ruins the moment by trying to make a fanged expression.
Blah blah blah Creepy Lair Inc.
Kato-sensei stumbles back home and falls off her bed.
OMG, THERE ARE CAPES IN THE FULL MOON - transition.
A gang of girls herd Lestat into a corner so one of them can give him a love letter - he drops it on the ground, and Oscar-sensei calls him out for littering.
Kato-sensei tries to talk to him, he calls her on the drunken shenanigans and also, lady, you kind of reek.
This boy is full of charm and DELIGHT, I say.
The previous night before, Oscar-sensei tried to ask Kato-sensei out on a date various times through her phone -...but she was busy getting drunk, so, mortification all around.
Nanami tries to get the homeroom's attention - she's the class representative, it seems, and is passing out sheet music.
Here comes one of my favorite WTF moments - there's a cross printed on the paper, and when Lestat sees the cross, he totally freaks out and knocks the papers out of her hand.
That's right. A PRINTED CROSS. TOTAL FAIL VAMPIRE.
Even EDWARD is cooler than Lestat, Jr. AND THAT IS A LOT OF FAIL.
Anyway, he's curt and dismissive to Nanami, cementing his total jackass personality in my mind - and the other boy (read: cog in the inevitable love triangle, rectangle) tries to punch him in the face, only Lestat has SUPER CRAZY REFLEXES and can avoid every punch at will.
A huge pointless ruckus erupts in the class, Nanami's in tears, everyone is wildly overexcited for such a little thing (seriously) and Lestat books it. Kato-sensei comes in and settles everyone down - and Lestat flees the scene. Because he's a leaver, a heartbreaker, you see.
I ffed a bunch of Sensei-scenes, she ruins a date with Oscar sensei because she's out looking for Lestat, Lestat breaks a mirror with his incredible Boy Pain, and OOPS, ANOTHER FAILED SUICIDE ATTEMPT-MEETCUTE. Oh, and somewhere before that, Kato-sensei slaps Lestat in the face while soft tinkling piano music plays mournfully in the background.
He walks away sullenly, swinging his stolen red umbrella.
But yes, back to the second failed suicide attempt meet cute - Kato sensei sees Lestat standing by the dock moodily and jumps to the conclusion that OH NOES, HE'S GOING TO JUMP, and flings herself at him --only, he's just standing there. And her heel decides at that climatic event to snap, and she naturally falls over the side of the dock, taking him with her ---
cue flashback and another time --- AND OHO. LESTAT IS THE DEAD RINGER FOR HER FIRST LOVE (who presumably was not a vampire because he was out in daylight - and apparently drowned while trying to rescue someone in the ocean) and you know Kato-sensei is younger in this flashback because she's wearing a sailor fuku and has BANGS.
I LOVE YOU, CONSISTENCY DEPARTMENT. NEVER CHANGE.
Anyway, in a bit of gratuitous wet-shirt moment, Kato-sensei stands in the bay and laughs to herself for no reason (I think this is supposed to illustrate that she's light hearted and joyful, but I can't help but think that Kato-sensei is a bit...dim.) as Lestat stands in the water with his umbrella looking on confused - and then pained, because, oh oh, what's this? HIS FANGS HAVE DESCENDED.
DUNH DUNH DUNH.
Next episode: the path to the woman of his destiny is never smooth as Lestat breaks into Nanami's room while she's in her pajamas, and then attempts to ask her for her notes on English predicates...no, he bites her. Or does some of his magic neck sniffing again. I AM VERY CONFUSED. Is this woman of destiny really just a PICK UP LINE, or now that the fangs are in, he can bite whomever he wishes?
Anyway, Nanami needs a rape whistle.
As does Kato-sensei, because the CHANGE comes upon Lestat in the piano room and he kind of half-hugs, half-lunges at her. Oh, thrilling romance.
And why are there no girl vampires?
THIS IS THE NEW FACE OF ROMANCE
...bwuh?
forget you, I need to go skulk in the shadows.
DON'T FORGET. NEW FACE OF ROMANCE.
DO I NOT DAZZLE YOU, BRIEF MORTALS? I DAZZLE EVEN MYSELF.
Just another day in the boy's bathroom.
No, you must not chase the girls...and suck their blood.
Hi red herring love interest! You look very pretty today!
Have I got my teeth in yet? Do you think my fangs make my face look fat?
If you were a girl, I'd kill you in your sleep. Then again....
I can hear her heartbeat.
Yes?
This scene, with the following camera and the music? Totally STALKER.
Just when you thought it was safe to go back to school.....
I'm going to suck you dry.
Pardon?
Oh, nothing. Hey did you see that bird?
What - OMG THE BUILDING IS GOING TO FALL ON US.
I'll save you, Bella!
Wrong movie - also, this is not quite on par with saving me from a TRAIN.
Your neck looks tasty in this light.
CURSES. Fangs. Can't. Extend.
I'm sure it happens all the time....
Shush, snack bar. I am trying to put you in my THRALL.
Oh damn it. I'll just have to try later.
Okay, that was kind of *$%@Q%! weird.
YOU HOOR.
Dear diary, today at school, I got ravished by the new boy! It was so AWESOME.
For your information, Sensei--
THIS SKIN. IS THE SKIN OF A KILLER. LOOK UPON MY FLAWLESS GLORY, PEASANT.
Huh, I think I see a zit forming - 'oourse, this could be the alcohol talking.
Grape juice. Not exactly the drink of vampires.
Woe. My life sucks.
Come ON, WHEN ARE MY FANGS GOING TO COME IN.
I've got 99 problems...and a red umbrella.
STAY CLASSY, JAPAN.
OH MY GOD. THE REMARKABLE COINCIDENCES, THEY JUST KEEP HAPPENING.
a fountain! it has magically erupted from the bay!
Yeah, that's not the only thing that's erupted.
what is this feeling?
THE FANGS HAVE DESCENDED. YOU HAVE FOUND YOUR WOMAN OF DESTINY!
NO WAY.
next time on As the Fang Turns,
Ruka (yes, I decided to use his actual name.) has an embarrassing moment in the piano room.
I'M IN YOUR BEDROOM, HAUNTING YOUR DREAMS.
look into my eyes.....
Does this mean we're going steady now?
Alas, no, Nanami. You are only the appetizer in his banquet of love.