Part 4: in which Diana follows through on a promise in the worst possible way - by accident
*****
Diana might have been serious at first, when she threatened to break one or both of Neal's arms if he tried to pull something over on her. Quite serious in fact, at first, and for a while. But the longer they worked together and the more she learned about him (and he about her), the better she understood him and liked him and trusted him. He could still be a pain in her ass, but she was absolutely certain he occasionally behaved that way just to yank her chain. It had become a team rallying cry by now.
So when she actually DID break his arm it was hard to know which one of them was more stunned. In Neal's defense, he hadn't done anything wrong, in fact, he had just defused a very ugly and potentially lethal confrontation into something far more peaceful during the last few minutes of his present undercover assignment. In Diana's defense, she had no idea that Neal had changed the situation from dangerous to safe, because his transmitter had been smashed shortly before. It was, regrettably, a matter of both of them being in the wrong place at the exact wrong moment, when she used the battering ram to force the door open into the room just as he reached for the knob from the other side. All parties involved were just thankful she hadn't opted to shoot off the lock.
Diana wanted to drive Neal to the hospital but, between her driving and Peter's, Neal almost begged Jones to take him. The crime scene was large and the list of charges growing, and they really needed all available agents. Neal convinced Peter that, A, he did not need an ambulance, and, B, he was perfectly capable of taking a cab to the hospital. He tried to look just pitiful enough that Peter would forget he was off-anklet, but not so pitiful that Peter would feel the need for formal medical transport. The adrenaline rush from the operation carried over long enough to get Neal through the initial pain radiating from his wrist to his shoulder, but that was fading and Neal no longer had to fake "pitiful." In fact, between the stress from the earlier negotiations and the pain from the metal door slamming into his outstretched hand, he was starting to look as wrecked as his transmitter.
That settled the matter for Peter. His very capable team could handle the crime scene. Jones was tasked with keeping a guilt-ridden Diana from sneaking out to check on Neal, and Peter would take Neal to the hospital himself, as was his responsibility as a supervisor, a handler, a partner and a friend.
There are three bones in the human arm: the humerus in the upper arm, and the ulna and radius in the forearm. There are eight more bones in the wrist, laid out in two rows of four, five in the palm, and fourteen in the fingers and thumb. Neal was pretty sure every one of them was forcefully shoved into at least two others when the door slammed open. The ER docs were inclined to agree, after x-rays and a CT scan found not only a messy fracture in the humerus, but both sprains and strains in his wrist and elbow. Muscle relaxants and a sedative allowed them to manipulate the break into place without surgery; everything else was going to have to heal on its own.
They brought Peter into Neal's curtained cubicle when they were about ready to release him. Neal was glassy eyed and looking more than a little off as he stared at the television that was not turned on.
"Mr. Caffrey," asked Dr. McElroy, according to his badge, "is it okay if I talk to Agent Burke about your arm?"
"Yeah, someone should, 'cause Peter worries a lot."
"Neal," said Peter, trying for the proper amount of gravitas for the situation, "I'm right here."
"Peter!" Neal sounded surprised and delighted. "Hey, Buddy."
Peter put his hand on Neal's good shoulder and smiled. "How are you feeling?"
"Like this really, really hurts, and I'm gonna regret it later."
"Your friend has a pretty high tolerance for pain, but he really shouldn't wait until he gets to that point to take something," said Dr. McElroy. "I'll have a couple of 'scripts with his discharge paperwork, he needs to keep ice on his wrist for the swelling, keep the whole arm elevated as much as possible, keep the cast dry. He said he lives alone, but I'm not comfortable with him being by himself for the next few hours. I can keep him here for a while, if necessary, but if we need the bed, then I'm - ."
"No, if he's alright to be released he can stay with my wife and me overnight."
"Peter, don't feel too good," Neal said, swallowing hard.
Peter took a quick look around the room but the doctor was quicker and got a plastic pan under Neal's chin just as he began vomiting.
"High tolerance for pain, not so much for the muscle relaxant. I'll give him a shot now and prescribe something for the nausea before you leave."
*****
"Uuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhh...."
"It's alive," said a nearby voice.
"If this is what Frankenstein's creature felt like, no wonder he was so crabby," Neal grumbled, trying to open one eye far enough to figure out what he was laying on. It reminded him a lot of the Burkes' couch.
"I'm sorry," said the voice, now clearly Peter's. "You want to try sitting up? You in pain? I can give you something in about a half hour, if you need it. No, Satchmo, leave Neal alone."
Good, he was right about the couch. He wasn't sure why he had been sleeping on Peter's couch, but he figured it would come to him eventually. Either that, or Peter would tell him if he had done something incredibly stupid that resulted in him being here.
"No pills, they just make me - wait, did I throw up earlier?"
"Yup, you sure did."
"Uhh," Neal said, sounding somewhat appalled.
"It's okay, the doc gave you something for nausea, too. Said you should take that first, have something to eat, then take the stuff for pain."
Neal did manage to get both eyes open, at least partially.
"Why am I - oh, right. My arm. Diana and the door. Please tell me she's not blaming herself for this."
"I would, but I'd be lying. She feels really badly. She thinks she could have announced herself better."
"Not her fault. It was a steel-reinforced door. Things were pretty tense when they smashed my watch, she was trying to keep me alive. At least, I hope so."
"I told her that, but maybe it would be better coming from you. She'd like to stop by later."
"Am I gonna be here later? I think I can manage at home, once I clear my head."
"Take your pills, have some food, keep it down, and we'll see how it goes. El's bringing home some of that fresh bread you like, and Jones said something about bringing some really good soup."
"Jones cooks?" Neal sounded surprised.
"I'm not sure, he just said he has a source."
Neal managed to sit up, and Peter got his casted arm situated on the back of the couch just as Elizabeth, Jones and Diana arrived. Neal wondered how their timing worked out so conveniently but was still a bit too foggy to worry about it. As expected, Jones brought soup to go Elizabeth's bread. Diana surprised them all with Italian ice - "the real stuff from Little Italy, not from one of those chains," she noted.
"Wow, I haven't had this since I was a little kid. How'd you know?" Neal asked with a smile as he peered into the bag.
"You might have mentioned it in the van one night," she said, blushing. "Neal, I - "
"I'm kind of hungry. I think I left lunch - let's just say it's been a while since I ate. Could we?"
Peter gave Neal the first pill with a bottle of water while Jones and Diana got plates and bowls and Elizabeth sliced the bread and brought utensils. They had a pleasant meal sitting in the Burkes' living room, talking about everything but the day's case. Finally, most of dinner consumed, Neal and Peter exchanged glances, Neal nodded, and Peter slipped him a pain pill over the coffee table.
"Alright, Caffrey, I have to get this out."
"Diana, stop. You were just watching out for me, right? Accidents happen, right?"
She nodded.
"And you swear you won't do it again, right?"
She grinned. "Well, you do have one free pass now."
"Good," he replied. "Then you can make it up to me by scooping me a dish of the lemon ice right now, because I think I'm probably gonna pass out in about twenty minutes. And then tomorrow you can give me a ride back home, if you promise drive green and not to kill the tree in your car. Deal?"
"Deal."
and finally to part 5 back to part 3