I Chose The Right Side

[calientechino]

"Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. for i know in part and i prophecy in part but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears."(1 Corin. 13:12) all this time i've been thinking about me. what will be fun for me, what will benefit the fun in my life right now. i wanted to lie. i wanted everything. i wanted to say what i wanted to say, not caring about who it would affect. i regret only caring about myself, and not about whether was right with what im supposed to be standing for. there were expectations i had for myself. but i didnt follow through. i gave it up to do whatever i felt like doing. people will definately think twice about whether or not they want to hang out with me again after they read this. but thats why im writing it. im writing it because i dont want to do anything just to be "cool" with the people i like anymore. i always said i was a christian. i always said i had a great walk with god and i had a great faith. i was only lying to myself. thats what i wanted for myself. i wanted to be christian around christian people and cool around non christian people. i had a foot on each side of the line and i cant do that. i can only be on one side or the other. so i thought last night, "which side am i going to choose? i mean, one side is so much fun, its what has made this year fun for me. but the other side...im going to be persecuted for. im not going to have as much fun. ill have a clear conscience, and a good reputation, but ill loose alot of friends" well today i sat by myself and decided. im choosing one side. im choosing the side that i need to be on. i dont want to write this, but i have to. i need to let everybody know who i am going to be. if you really care about me, you will accept me for this. if you dont, then walk away, because you'll only be an obstacle in my attempt to live my life differently. "in fact, everyone who wants to live a godly life in jesus christ will be persecuted" (2 Tim. 3:12). so just know. im changing. please support me."

"-ps-if you feel the same way, put this on your journal...i think i would feel better if i was not the only one going through this. and im sure im not."--Erin's Journal