degausser.
its been awhile. way too much has happened. im caught up in so many things. but still im not content, somehow. i dont think i ever will be. i think thats partly a good thing, that ill never be able to settle and im always striving for the best..but its also bad because to me, the "best" doesnt exist.my thoughts are jummbled, my mind can't make itself up. but that isnt my choice, and im convinved i cant change it..so ill just live with it. but i mean im not messed up. i can still sit here and laugh and joke around and be an idiot. ahh i dunno.
trust issues have been coming up a lot lately. lying kills me. i hate it. i hate not feeling like anyone is worth trusting either. i want someone that i can coem to and just say everything on my mind to and not be worried about how theyll react or who theyll tell. i keep so much to myself, and maybe thats why my thoughts are so unorganized..because i never actually speak them.so since its affected me so much, im writing my speech for next year on trust. and im glad that i finally got a topic, because i was convinced i never would.
its late. i cant type right because im really tired. my initial goal in typing this was to get something off of my chest..but im not so sure that i did. haa oh well, next time maybe.
trust issues have been coming up a lot lately. lying kills me. i hate it. i hate not feeling like anyone is worth trusting either. i want someone that i can coem to and just say everything on my mind to and not be worried about how theyll react or who theyll tell. i keep so much to myself, and maybe thats why my thoughts are so unorganized..because i never actually speak them.so since its affected me so much, im writing my speech for next year on trust. and im glad that i finally got a topic, because i was convinced i never would.
its late. i cant type right because im really tired. my initial goal in typing this was to get something off of my chest..but im not so sure that i did. haa oh well, next time maybe.