Fic: E-Fail 5 (sho/jun)

Jan 09, 2011 19:41

Title: E-Fail 5
Word Count: 1,047
Rating: PG
Genre: Humor
Disclaimer: None of this ever happened.
Summary: It’s Sho’s first birthday with Jun, and Jun wants to make it freaking magical, okay?


To: Ohno Satoshi; Aiba Masaki; Ninomiya Kazunari
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Top Secret!

As you’re all aware - or should be, at least - Sho’s birthday is coming up. I want to plan the surprise party to end all surprise parties for him.

Thoughts? Ideas? Let’s brain ~storm!

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Sakurai Sho
Subject: Hey.

Do you have plans this evening?

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To: Sakurai Sho
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Hey.

I’m working on a project right now, but hopefully I’ll be done by 6:00. After that I’m all yours.

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Sakurai Sho
Subject: Re: Re: Hey.

Ah, that’s what I like to hear!

What sort of project?

+++

To: Sakurai Sho
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Hey.

Ohhh, I suppose you’ll find out soon enough. ;)

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To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ninomiya Kazunari
Subject: Re: Top Secret!

Your puns suck.

+++

To: Ninomiya Kazunari
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Re: Top Secret!

Do you have anything actually constructive to contribute?

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To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ninomiya Kazunari
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Top Secret!

Oh, I’m sorry!

Yours puns will ALWAYS suck, and I suggest you stop them immediately.

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Aiba Masaki
Subject: I LOVE SECRETS

i think the surprise party should be a sexy surprise party!!

+++

To: Ninomiya Kazunari
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Top Secret!

Always a pleasure, Nino.

If nothing else, do you have any gift ideas? I’m kind of stuck (and obviously desperate), and you’re really close to him...

+++

To: Aiba Masaki
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: I LOVE SECRETS

You know how Sho gets about “pink” stuff in public. I think he might actually die.

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Aiba Masaki
Subject: Re: Re: I LOVE SECRETS

ohhhhhhhhh, right right right! well, we could do a public regular surprise party, and then you guys could have a private sexy surprise party afterwards!!! ;D ;D ;D

+++

To: Aiba Masaki
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Re: Re: I LOVE SECRETS

Yeah, you need to stop talking about Sho’s and my private “sexy parties”. This is the fifth time, it’s getting creepy.

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ninomiya Kazunari
Subject: I’ll just list stuff

And you can stop me when something strikes your fancy. Ahem:

Grocery coupons

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Sakurai Sho
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Hey.

I can’t figure out if that winking face signifies something good or something bad.

+++

To: Sakurai Sho
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Hey.

...I honestly couldn’t tell you right now. Check back later.

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ohno Satoshi
Subject: Re: Top Secret!

you're the one who’s good at planning things...why are you asking us?

+++

To: Ohno Satoshi
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Re: Top Secret!

I just want it to be extra special!

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ninomiya Kazunari
Subject: #2

Socks

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ninomiya Kazunari
Subject: #3

Lawn fertilizer

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Aiba Masaki
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: I LOVE SECRETS

:<

i'm sorry!!! i don’t mean to be creepy! i'm just so happy that you and sho-chan are happy!!

+++

To: Aiba Masaki
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: I LOVE SECRETS

Wow. Way to make me feel like I just strangled a kitten.

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Aiba Masaki
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: I LOVE SECRETS

;D

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Sakurai Sho
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Hey.

...Should I be worried about how ominous this all sounds?

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ohno Satoshi
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Top Secret!

cake

+++

To: Ohno Satoshi
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Top Secret!

What the hell?

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ohno Satoshi
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Top Secret!

what? special occasions have cakes.

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ohno Satoshi
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Top Secret!

that's what makes them special

+++

To: Ohno Satoshi
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Top Secret!

...Okay, you’re clearly as useless as Nino at this.

Might as well ask, though: any gift ideas?

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ninomiya Kazunari
Subject: #4

Gold, star-shaped nipple pasties

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Aiba Masaki
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: I LOVE SECRETS

OOH. when was the last time he saw all of his keio friends??

his birthday’s on a tuesday, if you call them up they can surprise him by being at the studio when we’re done filming!!

+++

To: Aiba Masaki
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: I LOVE SECRETS

Aiba-chan, that’s a great idea!

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Aiba Masaki
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: I LOVE SECRETS

MASAKI DOT COM!!!!

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ninomiya Kazunari
Subject: #5

Tell him you’re in madly in love with him

+++

To: Ninomiya Kazunari
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: #5

...Oh.

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ninomiya Kazunari
Subject: Re: Re: #5

Seriously, Jun-kun, stop being such a little bitch and USE YOUR WORDS.

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ohno Satoshi
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Top Secret!

sho-kun says he wants a new digital camera.

+++

To: Ohno Satoshi
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Top Secret!

Wait...has Sho been next to you THIS WHOLE TIME?

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Ohno Satoshi
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Top Secret!

[attached file: ohno-tuna-catch-thumbs-up.jpg]

+++

To: Ohno Satoshi
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Top Secret!

You brought this upon yourself.

[attached file: jun-fiery-death-glare.jpg]

+++

To: Sakurai Sho
From: Matsumoto Jun
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Hey.

Nah, don’t worry. Turns out the winking face was a good one. ♥

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Sakurai Sho
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Hey.

I see. Then I look forward to hearing more.

+++

To: Matsumoto Jun
From: Sakurai Sho
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Hey.


fic: e-fail, pairing: sho/jun, rating: pg

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