(no subject)
I am wide awake. I don't know if it is the lack of sleep and all the stress from these fucking hurricanes, but I have not been sleeping good. Well I just woke in the middle of a nightmare that involved my two young boys and my daughter who has been dead for over a year. This nightmare basically well I was alone with the boys and I was scared....someone kept trying to break in, well in my dream these men did break into my home and started taking stuff, I was trying to get my boys and myself out and I couldn't find the car keys, so I picked up the phone to call my husband and they had cut the lines. So we tried to make a run for it and they saw us. Threw three bags to put over myself and my two boys......Well that scene ended and I was in another scene, still frightened that someone was going to break in and I just kept trying to protect the boys, no matter what though I couldn't get in touch with my husband....He seemed so far away when I did try talking to him..............Finally I just yelled , I WANT TO WAKE UP!!! And there were some other scenes, I saw Elizabeths clothes in the bathroom, started balling and the next thing I know, she is holding my hand pulling my boys and I away from it all and then I woke up. Crying and I am still crying right now. I have dreamed of Lizzy before but never like that, we never held each other or anything like that............SO yeah I am a bit freaked out. Here it is almost 2 in the morning and I can't stop crying or thinking about her holding my hand and just taking me away from this nightmare......I had to take a Valium.....I don't think it is working. I calmed down a bit but damn I just wish she was here so much and I don't know what this dream meant, It probably meant the total opposite of what I am thinking.......I am gonna try to lay down, but I doubt there will be any sleep for me tonight..........again.