time of death

[caitlin411baby]

alright so tomorrow i have the long-awaited tonsilectomy and adeniodectomy..(hard to spell..) im kind of excited at the fact that i won't have to worry with getting sick as much but i'm scared to "go under the knife" so to speak. i've never had surgery of any kind and what if i don't wake up from the anesthesia? (ok-doubtful, but always possible) i forgot who it was i was talking about this with, but if i were to die right now, there would be the most random people at my funeral..half of which my parents wouldn't even know..i know it's kind of morbid to talk about that, but whatever. at lease if i were to die tomorrow it can be said that i really did live a fun, exciting life..while i was alive and yes- while i made stupid mistakes like the rest of the teenage population, they are what kept things interesting! ok so i made bad decisions about boys and about substances but i was never completely irresponsible. (in my opinion) and yes i wrecked my car and had to pay $2500 in damages with all the summer money i earned but hey-live and learn..I'm glad that nother was really ever handed to me growing up because it's taught me values and so much about life and myself and just well..everything. none of those stuck up snobby spoiled brats in NCL can say that. but yes i really strayed with that comment..so in light of surgery tomorrow i'm going out with liv and em to get coffee and chill..especially since the day she leaves (olivia) i'll probably be strung out on pain medication and won't be able to give her a proper goodbye..not that i even could sober..

OLIVIA __(INSERT MIDDLE NAME HERE)_____ BUCK: I AM GOING TO MISS THE HELL OUT OF YOU WHEN YOU LEAVE AGAIN AND I WILL PROBABLY SUFFER FROM POST-LIV PSYCHOSIS..I LOVE YOU! DON'T EVER FORGET THAT!

ok..things to do. peace.