"like trading brains with an imbicile"

[cainjournalform]

This was my only day off of work for the whole week, so I attempted to make the most of it...kinda. I turned in my shitty-ass scholarship for Girl Scouts, which I'm assuming they will cram up their ass with no regard. Ummm...then I went for coffee with Brian and he brought some of his poetry...which I read...and can't touch. I have no command of the English language. Anyway, we spent about 3 hours at Starbucks and then he had to go home to do homework. He's on spring break, you'd think the kid would relax a bit...although his is mildly neurotic. I probably won't see him again until the summer because we have no time. Sweet...right. Anywho after that I went to Subway to visit, although Erin was the only person working who I cared to see. She was quite upset and so I left when she told me to and just figured I'd come back when she wasn't angry anymore...and I later found out that she wasn't angry at all. So I went to the choir concert which was pretty good and saw some people...yeah. Then I went back to Subway and talked to Erin and ...damn...I definately forgot his name...nice guy though. After they closed I talked to Erin for a little and then I had to go home...and that's as far as I got.
I'm reading The Bell Jar right now...thank you Christine. It is excellent. Read it.
I'm still feeling apathetic to some extent, but I worry about people a lot. It just pisses me off that I don't know how to make everything better. I know that's stupid and illogical, but I really want to find a way to make people understand how fucking amazing they are. It doesn't matter how many times you tell them, they don't believe it. It's so frustrating how such phenomenal people cannot see themselves as being so. I can't give up either, I just keep trying and trying and it's pointless, I can't make them see it.