Picspam Reaction: Doctor Who Series 5 Christmas Special
I don't know whether watching this now is early or late or what, considering I've already seen Holiday displays being set up in stores and Halloween hasn't even passed yet... O.o
Contains profanity and things. Possibly innuendo.
I'm going to try to reign it in on the screencapping on this and following reaction posts, due to continuing LJ errors with batch uploaders. :-P
Doctor Who Series Five Christmas Special - A Christmas Carol
Okay, lets start this.
*one minute later, tosses the idea of trying to restrict screencaps* Sigh.
-Lovely cotton-candy-storm planet with excellent views of the Horsehead nebula (which probably wouldn't look like that unless we're in a direct line between it and Earth, but whatever.)
-Slight turbulence. Ha.
-Is it just me or is it looking a bit like the Enterprise-D bridge in here. There's even a guy with half a Visor.
-"Christmas is cancelled." Great, how does that stop the ship from crashing? It's not crashing into London, probably, so the Christmas curse wouldn't be negated by it not being Christmas. Also hard to convince a crashing spaceship. Captain: 'No, no, it's all right, you don't need to crash now, Christmas is cancelled!'/Ship: '...bollocks. Well, next year then. *engines reboot*'
-"What kind of clouds?" Dude, you're trying to keep a spaceship from crashing, hardly the time for recreational meteorology.
-HA! Let me- no actually, I don't even think I'll bother guessing. XD
-*facepalm* Well, it is their honeymoon. Costumes optional.
-"Are you from the honeymoon suite?"/"Oh, shut up." Hee!
-And of course Rory in the Roman garb. Not sure what kind of kinky scenarios can be concocted involving those two costume sets, but that's entirely up to the two of them and any kinkmemes that might exist.
-"Does this mean he's coming or does it mean I need to change the bulb?" I missed you Rory! *smishes*
-*snerk*
-Ooo, pretty.
-Halfway out of the dark. Exactly. *nods*
-"I call it expecting something for nothing!" And hello Scrooge-like being of the hour.
-4500 whatevers must be worth a hell of a lot to put up a family member's freedom as collateral. I suppose people have gone to jail for stealing less, but putting a member of the family into deep freeze? Looking at it from a solely economic standpoint, yes, the person won't be needing to eat or be clothed, but cryostasis can't be too cheap to maintain. Also, taking her out of the potential workforce reduced the family's capacity to pay back the loan because she won't be able to find any sort of employment, so keeping her frozen is not only costing him money to keep her there, it's keeping him from getting paid back sooner.... *shakes head hard* God. Never ever take an economics course. Ever. :-P
-He does keep interestingly-garbed flunkies. That floor length rubber apron isn't unnerving at aaaaall.
-"Or it'll crash, sir."/"Oh. Well it's a kind of landing, isn't?" True. Very hard on whatever it's landing on though.
-HA! Down the chimney indeed. Incidentally, fire does that with most small particles, though not quite that emphatically. Used to toss handfuls of dirt into campfires to watch the sparkle.
-"My whole brain just went 'what the hell?'" Eleven. Hee. *headshake*
-"Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or, as I've always known him, Jeff." So is this conformation that Santa's a Time Lord? Named Jeff? How'd he escape the Time War then?
-"A big flashy lighty thing, that's what bought me here." Eleven is, on many occasions, a bit like a toddler. On espresso. Made with caffeinated water.
-"Big flashy lighty things have got me written all over them. Not actually. Give me time. And a crayon." *nods* Toddler.
-Must say, aside from a bit of deep disdain, our Scrooge of the evening doesn't seem any too bothered by this loud, babbling, insane breach in his stronghold's security.
-"In 900 years of time and space, I've never met anyone who wasn't important before." Aw. I think. Kind of directly contradicts a few things he's said now and then over the years, but oh well.
-*giggles at entire isomorphic discussion* Of course you've heard of isomorphic, silly, but never mind. *pats*
-"Without your help they're going to die."/"Yes." Ooo. Eleven's about to kick some cloud-baron posterior, methinks.
-"Four thousand and four." Yep. Serious looks good on him.
-"Whatever happens tonight, remember, you brought it on yourself." *facepalm* Making Eleven the ghost of Marley?
-I very much appreciate the sentiment, kid, but you've got to learn to pick your battles. This could very well get you frozen alongside your aunt.
-"But you didn't hit the boy." Yep. There has to be a spark of something to work from if we're going to do Christmas Carol.
-"The chairs." And it's swirly holographic zoom-o-vision time again.
-As I said, serious and intense looks good on Eleven. He should do it more often.
-"Halfway out of the dark." *grins like a crazy person*
-Heheh. According to the hard to cap text on its side, the crashing (and managing to stretch out the crash quite a long while, good for it!) spaceship is a 'Starliner: Galaxy Class'. No wonder the bridge looks a bit like the Enterprise.
-Either the new Sonic Screwdriver can't do that universal roaming thing that Ten's could (and I'm fairly sure it already has) or Amy really needs a cell phone upgrade. That thing is ridiculous. I got mine for free years ago and it's one-tenth the size of that thing, and doesn't have any knobbly bits. Although maybe Amy just likes things huge with knobbly bits. Erm. *glances at Rory* Heh. *blushes* *
-"Have you got a plan yet?"/"Yes I do."/"Are you lying?"/"Yes I am." Hee!
-"-and he hates me."/"Were you being extra charming and clever?"/"Yeah, how did you know?" *facepalm*
-"Merry Christmas." Hang on. Wasn't it called Crystal something on this planet? Crystal Feast? Yeah. ...hunh. Must be some kind of translation circuit error. Yeah. *moves on*
-"The fog's thick tonight, and there's a fish warning." Yup. Traslation circuits. *nods*
-"He always lets a few fish through the cloud layer when he's in a bad mood." Fish that swim in the clouds. Why not?
-*takes a brief Rory break*
-"Fiiish." *snerk* Okay, this is extra funny to me particularly, because 'fish' is the word most of the people in the place I work use instead of the more typical and less client-friendly pejorative options. So it being said like that connotates exactly like 'fuuuuck' to me on a euphemism level. And rather appropriately, since I doubt people would be hiding from the fish if they weren't a threat of some kind. Sky-pirhanas maybe. You know between these fog-fish and the space whale, someone on the writing staff likes aquatic critters.
-"Why would people be frightened of you tiny little fellas?" *facepalm* Right now I don't know if he's just saved up most of his moments of dumb for his Eleventh self, or whether Time Lords of sufficiently advanced age lose all common sense. It's not like he hasn't run across innocent looking things that turn out to be all vicious and murdery before. *hides and waits for Eleven to get attacked by fog-fish*
-*watches large shadow pass by* Yeah. Or that.
-'Ding Dong Merrily on High' Okay, so, Christmas. People on this planet are close to Western Earth humanity then, surprise! I wonder what the Crystal Feast would have been like? *drifts for a moment*
-"A what?"/"A Christmas Carol!" Pft. BWAHAHAHAHAHAAH! Nothing like having your rescue strategy mapped out for you three millenia ago by a famous Victorian novelist. Who you've met! And fought off an alien invasion with in Cardiff. There's lovely.
-He was an adorable kid, our evil-or-just-traumatised-as-a-child-and-coping-badly overlord.
-The fish like the singing. What fish doesn't like singing, really?
-Yeah, traumatised is one word for it. *moves on*
-You know, for a sky and government controlling overlord, evil or otherwise, his home security is utter crap.
-"Had to recover the data using quantum enfolding and a paper clip." Hee! I might have done that once, with less quantum and more paper clip.
-"Apparently they won the lottery at exactly the same time." Eleven has less compunction about profiteering using temporal mechanics than prior Doctors, but in his defence he's not doing it for his own sake, he's doing it for a bunch of people who work for a nasty overlord who makes them wear rubber aprons, or other people who live with people he needs to become the flatmate of, and I think there's another one or two I'm forgetting. Ten did kind of break the ice though with the lottery win for the Physics teacher he replaced at the school with the Krillitane, and of course the ticket for Donna's wedding present. Temporally-fudged lottery-win philanthropy. Slippery slope, dude. *headshake*
-"There isn't a lottery." *tsks* Yep. Slippery slope.
-Life's most valuable lesson. "Nobody comes." Ow.
-"I'll be back. Way back." Ohhhhh crap. He's not going to do the 'let the guy see his past present future thing, is he? He's going to take him there, or go back and fix his child self. Yes. There's a bit of Time Travel in this show. *headdesk*
-Yes. Fine. MASSIVE PARADOX. But okay. Whatever. Arg. Unleeeeeess... this always happened in that recording and Wee!Supreme!Overlord here forgot the truth through aggressive anti-imaginary friend counseling, (or more likely his dad beat it out of him, grr) and then erased the recording and he didn't remember the bit where someone actually did come. Yeah. *handwaves*
-"She only went and won the lottery."/"THERE ISN'T ANY LOTTERY!" Hahahahahah.
-"Your past is going to change which means your memories are going to change too, bit scary but you'll get the hang of it." ...Psychological counseling and trauma management. With time travel. Never mind healing your inner child, someone can go back and deal with whatever heinous crap was going on when you were an actual child. Absolutely hell yeah, and where do I donate for time travel psychotherapy research. Because no amount of therapy will be better than stopping things that should never happen to a kid or anyone else when they were happening. *moving on*
-"That never happened!" Yes it did, now hush and get temporally therapized or whatever.
-"But it did." There you go! Not so hard, is it?
-"There's a thing called a face-spider, it's like a tiny baby's head with spider legs, and it's specifically evolved to scuttle up the backs of bedroom cupboards." ...And do what? Is he giving Future Overlord Boy something else to transfer his fear of his father to so he won't be obsessed with the fog-fish and need to build a giant sky-control-zapping thingy? O.o
-I love little details like this. The steam-punkish laptop cam is on and showing an image of the room that doesn't have the camera crew in it. Bits of dressing and detail that give it a little more verisimilitude.
-"What are we gonna do, eat crisps and talk about girls? I've never actually done that but I bet it's easy. Girls!" *facepalm*
-"I think you'll find that I'm universally recognized as a mature and responsible adult." *SNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERK* Mature, well, yeah, it's hard to beat 900 years for most bipedal humanoid life forms. Responsible? Oh yeah. He's responsible for lots of things. Adult? "There's no point in being grown-up if you can't be childish sometimes," aside, he's of legal age as considered by the laws of his people, particularly if they were trying to stuff him into the role of Lord President of Gallifrey at a few points. So in a sense, yes it's all true. Babysitter? I suspect he'd be less Mary Poppins and more Cat in the Hat if babysitting was all he was trying to accomplish here.
-Also, that window into the fish-fog is still wide open. Just sayin'.
-"No, it's shorted out, finally a lie too big." HAHAHAHAAHAH! But it was all so justifiable! XD
-"Have you ever seem Mary Poppins?"/"No?"/"Good, 'cause that comparison would have been rubbish." Yes. Cat in the Hat model. Thing One and Thing Two are stuck in orbit though. Hence the babysitting therapy.
-"Fish in the clouds. How do people ever get bored? How did boredom even get invented?" Hee!
-"Dangerous!" Hehe. You only saw the guppies, dude. Wait for it.
-Fishing for fog fish with the sonic screwdriver as bait. Hee. Sonic fishing lures do exist and I know from personal experience when I was a kid that they're very effective, so the principal here is quite sound. Plus, flashy light and the little ones seemed to like the flashing light. Not sure about the big ones though.
-This is just too adorable for words.
-Ah, so he's not afraid of the fish, he missed a shared experience regarding the fish at school, and feels like more of an outcast because of it. And what an awfully convenient timing on that illness. Wonder if Daddy knew something.
-Ahahahahaha. And he's wearing a bow-tie. And now he knows why.
-I've got to admit, the fish are cute. At least the wee ones.
-And SHAAAAAAAAARK! AHAHAHAHAHA! Too fast to tell if it's cute or not. XD
-Not so cute actually. And I think it just ate the sonic screwdriver, so good luck with that, Eleven.
-"Well, concentrating on the plusses, you've definitely got a story of your own now." Ah yes the story of the strange babysitter who came in through the window and lured a smog-shark into his room. Brilliant. Love that one.
-*puts head on desk and laughs at Eleven babbling* "There's a shark in my bedroom!?"/"Oh fine! Focus on that bit!" *laughs more*
-"What do you call it if you don't have any feet and you're taking a run-up?" RAMMING SPEED! \o/
-If it wasn't a determined killing machine already, having some little metal thing stuck in its tummy buzzing and vibrating its organs unpleasantly would certainly not help it have a friendly mood.
-"Concentrating on the plusses... in reach." Oh dear. You're well past the first fifteen hours of your regeneration, you know. You can't grow a new arm if you lose one.
-Great, you made the kid cry. Actually, considering his apparent lack of empathy as an adult overlord... Great! You made the kid cry! And feel bad about a big fish dying! \o/
-"We need a fully functioning life support-"/"You mean like an ice box? Okay!" Oh you sly person. Did you manage to deliberately wound a smog-shark so the kid would show you where the cryo-chambers are? ...Actually I doubt it. But... *side-eyes*
-Considering the Doctor's past few experiences involving Christmas trees, one would think he'd be less likely to run up and put his face next to it. And grope the Christmas balls. Though he could be checking for explosives or remote controls here.
-"The surplus population, that's what my dad calls it." Heh. Nice sideways Dickens quote there. "If they were like to die they had better do so and decrease the surplus population."
-Though really, if his dad was 100% evil, he could just forget about developing the shield thing, let the sharks roam free and they'd take care of the surplus population, so chalk up a point for daddy, I guess? :-P
-"7258!"/"Just what I was after. Thank you!" HA! Smug prat.
-Oh hi fish... what are you doing in a locked room...?
-"The house is built on a fog-lake." Well that's fine then. Who wouldn't want a lake of fog in their basement to keep the spare people frozen.
-Aw, he's got a crush. On a girl his abusive dad's got frozen in the basement. Seems like a healthy basis for a relationship.
-It's signalling the other half. Which is inside a stunned shark on the roof. Yeaaaaaah, that's a lot of boding not going well all of a sudden.
-...How'd it get through the vault door? Or is there another way in, in which case why didn't they come in that way? Maybe Future Overlord Kid doesn't know about the other way in? Or someone forgot to shut the door. MEH. Whatever. It got in. RUN!
-*facepalm* Kid, when something is chasing you, never back up into anywhere. Because even if it's a giant flying smog-shark, it will still sneak up on you from behind. Somehow.
-*snerk* Shark's a bit of a lowrider. Or part flounder. The fog's less than 2 feet deep there.
-...*blink* Okay then! They like music, and the kid's dream girl is a shark-whisperer.
-"*Eleven babbles about ice crystal vibrations*"/"Look, fish like the singing, okay? Now shut up!"/"*gawps and wabbles* Okaaaaay." Heeee! Congratulations, kid. Galaxy-spanning empires haven't managed to shut him up. And of course the whatever's 'biting' Eleven is actually something to do with the ice crystals vibrating, yeah?
-Hello major change in his life... kind of unnerving that she's still wearing her 'freezing day' clothes in the picture, though. Maybe he keeps her frozen and just hauls her out whenever he feels like it? Maybe like that guy on Torchwood that Tosh was dating once a year. It'd help with the initial age difference, but... *shudders* Still a long ways to go to fix our broken overlord.
-"I keep amazing out here." Yeaaaah, show off.
-Nifty steampunky camera. Not a terribly ergonomic design, but what the heck, it has rivets.
-"You are a doctor, you say. Are you one of mine?" Ahhhh, maybe the early ones are picked for cryo-freezing for health reasons? Hm.
-"He comes every Christmas eve!" Well, then, looks like it's, what, couple hours each Christmas eve, going back as long as a twelve year old can clearly remember, so maybe ten years, that's twenty hours worth of Christmas eve with our mini-overlord. Also, payback. What Eleven is doing is changing the guy's memories in the future, now he's getting unexpected news about what he's going to do from a kid who didn't know who he was a little while ago, and is now going to go back and do the things the kid said he did. I love time travel.
-Or the kid said that to make sure the Eleven would come back and get her out every year and awwwwwww. Probably primarily motivated by self-interest, but still, awwww.
-Yep. Not an ID number, it's a countdown.
-"Except at Christmas." Sleigh ride. In the sky. With a smog-shark pulling the sleigh. Um. *headdesk* SURE! WHY NOT?
Swishing through the sky,
with a one-shark open sleigh,
into the clouds we go,
laughing all the way.
HA HA HA.
-*wibbles* I don't quite know why yet, but *wibbles*
-"How can I have new memories?" Well, if it's at all reassuring, I can confirm that you haven't been hitting the wrong Pensieve. (Yes, I recognized the actor as the guy who plays Dumbledore. I didn't recognize his face without the plethora of hair but the voice is unmistakeable.)
-Considering the kid isn't doing a lot of growing between Christmas eves and would now be 14, I almost wonder if it isn't all the same Christmas Eve and they're just saying it's another, since she wouldn't really notice. Though to be honest it is hard to find child actors who can manage a year's worth of growing between takes, including the beginnings of puberty. Tsk. Slackers, all of them. XD
-"Merry Christmas!"/"Doctor!" Fezzes for everyone! You know, much as Christmas is fun and all, if my only conscious day was spent on Christmas eve doing Christmas things, I'd get good and sick of Christmas after a few iterations. Though shark sleigh rides and trips through all of time and space aren't often on my holiday dance card.
-"Merry Christmas!"/"Doctor!" Scarves! \o/ And someone's had a growth spurt at 16! And is shy now, aw. And our frozen girl is now at 4, yes? You'd think one of them might notice.
-Yep. Four. Hehe. And they had scarves for when it turned Four. How appropriate. Maybe Eleven's noticed subliminally?
-"Merry Christmas!"/"...Kazran!" Heeeeee! Yeah, he's not doing so bad at this growing up business now, is he? Just in time for your clock to start getting very close to running out.
-Oh. Yeah, this will help with the empathy issue. Seriously, though, what, five Christmases and they've never once taken her to see her family?
-"When girls are crying are you supposed to talk to them?"/"I have absolutely no idea." Heeee. Depends on context.
-*facepalm* Well, there you are, why not make up for five years of missing out directly.
-"His father treats everyone like cattle. One day that boy'll do the same."/"No, he's different." Well he is now. Or at least he's getting there. And, on the Dickens parallel, we've reached an approximation of Christmas Present. The Cratchit family. Whose Christmas lights might not even be LED, in the year four thousand whatever, so that's either really poor, or secretly wealthy enough to have 3000 year old antique light strings and not care about the environment.
-"We'll have it tonight!" Dude, whatever you might be roasting better get going quick. Good thing you were already peeling the potato-like objects though!
-Thousands of years in the future, different world, fish flying through the sky, and Christmas is still all hats and crackers and brussells sprouts. Which is sweet, but I would really like to see one of these Christmas specials branch out a bit one of these times and show some future traditions or a different sort of winter festival. You'd think at least brussells sprouts, given their generally renowned unpopularity would have died out or not been saved for seed stock on colony ships or what have you. Though this is a dictatorship with an evil abusive overlord, currently. Maybe the sprouts are mandatory? (Personally, I like them, but there are wars fought less bitterly than getting my brother-in-law or nephew to eat a single one.)
-Also, crackers get popped before filling plates, not after, otherwise you'll lose the toy in the mashed potatoes and get gravy on the paper hat. Heheh. You know, I'm wondering if Eleven didn't add some things to this dinner himself in terms of trappings and trim. It would explain the very Commonwealth Traditional look to it. He almost definitely had to cook the turkey/meat beast in the foreground. Stick it in the Tardis oven, send the Tardis off somewhere for however many hours, have it come right come right back. Roasted meat beast in 10 seconds flat. Beats all hell out of a microwave.
-"Your card I believe?"/"No." Poor Eleven tries too hard sometimes.
-*snerk* A bit loomy, but you're getting there.
-Erm, Eleven, I believe that the technical term here is 'gooseberry'?
-Kissing advice from Eleven: "Try and be all nervous and rubbish and a bit shaky, because you're gonna be like that anyway and that's what'll make it part of the plan and then it'll fail on purpose." ...this mindset suits Eleven, really. Plan to have no plan and then succeed by failing. *nods*
-"It's this or go to your room and design a new kind of screwdiver." *snerk* Hey, don't down the sonic screwdriver! Especially after you fed it to a freaking shark. *googles* It was referred to by name on TV the first time by the second Doctor in Fury of the Deep, but the same prop was used in the second series of the first Doctor's run, so it wasn't necessarily anyone in-series that he was too nervous to snog. I'll bet the fanfic writers had a field day with that.
-*mutters I will not mock the photoshopping I will not mock the photoshopping I will not mock the photoshopping... snerk*
-Holy crap, she changed her clothes. O.o
-"The truth." Aaaand hello other shoe. There's a lot of you hanging around, isn't there?
-"I just accidentally got engaged to Marilyn Monroe." After that misunderstanding-or-was-it with River, you'd think you'd have learned.
-"How do you keep going like that do you breathe out your ears or something?" *facepalm*
-"I'll just go and get married, shall I? See how you like that." Hee! *headshake*
-Heeheeeheeeheeeheeee. Fishie! \o/
-"Got some work now with my dad, get that cloud belt under control." Why do you not just say why? Now he's going to think you'll still grow up to be an evil bastard and try something completely useless rather than curing your once-a-year girlfriend. Then again he could have stuck around and listened to what the problem is rather than running off and marrying a movie star. And she could have told her problem to the guy with the magic go-anywhere box who might be able to do something about it instead of the powerless overlord-scion. THEY'RE ALL IDIOTS!
-"I won't need you." Ouch.
-"What's happened, what are you not telling me?" SERIOUSLY, YOU KNOW THERE'S A METER THING RIGHT THERE! WHY ARE YOU NOT LOOKING AT IT YOU OBLIVIOUS TWONK???
-Aw, woobie-face future overlord... TELL YOUR MAGIC CHRISTMAS EVE BABYSITTER WHAT'S GOING ON!!!
-And the abusive jerk is back on the wall. Great. ARG!
-"People are cattle. If you want to control the cattle, control their predators." Sound strategy, yeah, but *shivers*
-"This planet is ours."/"Excuse me, father. I've just remembered I've got some urgent thwarting to do." Sorry, that second bit wasn't actually in there, I have no idea where that could possibly have come from... XD
-I see also the minions' aprons were slightly shorter and possibly leather during evil father's reign. Ah well, fashions change.
-Yay! Now who's going to get the signal first, Eleven or the smog-shark with the other bit of screwdriver in it?
-Of course. Kazran didn't even have to activate it. Eleven probably had it set for 'detect intent stare' before he handed it over. *nods*
-"*'told you you'd need me' smirk*"/"*glare* *curtain face*" HA! Eleven, honey? That's what you get for being a stalker. *pats* XD
-"It's not going to crash on my house so what's it got to do with me?" Yeah, still a ways to go on the rehabilitation there.
-"As a very old friend of mine took a very long time to explain, life isn't fair." Ohhhhh. Yeah. Need to work on that.
-"I'm the Ghost of Christmas Present." Okay so we actually are getting one of those then. And it's holographic Amy in a kissogram costume. Could be worse. Though if they keep to pattern, Rory's going to lose a lot of time explaining why, as the ghost of Christmas Future, he's dressed as a Roman Centurion. The resurgence of the trans-galactic Roman Empire perhaps.
-Or not. Hi Rory! "Eyes off the skirt!" Which one, hers or yours?
-Hard to send away carol singers without offering cookies or something, but leaving them all on their crashing spaceship (how long is that thing gonna crash for?), that's cold. Must say, they're doing really well at keeping on pitch for being on a crashing spaceship. Maybe the hologram projector has 5th millennium auto-tune?
-"Time can be rewritten."/"You tell the Doctor, you tell him from me. People can't!" Hmmm... there's thinkiness in there somewhere.
-"And she would live a single day." Yep. And how hard was that to tell someone, silly boy? Ooo! Ooo! The Ghost of Christmas Future's going to be Eleven swooping in and taking Abigail to a higher-tech level medical facility and fixing her, right?
-Not as easy to dismiss others lives and suffering when you're sharing their experience, is it? On a slightly nerve-wracking note, exactly what is Rory doing poking at a random console? Ohhhh, Rory widen the beam. I heard 'Murray'. No idea why.
-*harmonious fish resonance trying to sing them out of crashing but it's no good babble* "Why are they still singing then?"/"Because we haven't told them." Oooooof. And a bit of Titanic there too, randomly.
-"Nobody has to die."/"Everybody has to die."/"Not tonight."/"Tonight's as good as any other night." All true. Still, hard. Also, still broken.
-"I'm sorry. I didn't realise." Well you didn't exactly ask either. OR LOOK AT THE STUPID METER! Aaaaaaaaaaaarg. *headdesk*
-"Better a broken heart than no heart at all." There are people in the world who would probably slap you for saying that.
-"Try it. You try it." Pretty sure he has to some extent over the 900+ years.
-"I don't and never ever will care!" Oh dear. You've issued him a challenge now. You're screwed.
-"So what do you think?" Oh crap, Eleven's defrosted her while Kazran was a hologram. And she's gonna kick his ass and then get healed by future medicine. Woohoo! \o/
-Or not. Awesome. Just thinking about seeing the experience as the memory of it happening is being written in his memory is giving me a headache. It's like a feedback squeal.
-Um, um, Blinovitch effect! Don't let them touch!!
-"Dad?" Oooooooooo buuuuuuuuuurn.
-*headdesk* Well, I guess Blinovitch has had it with all the universe getting ended or squished or whatever business and has gone on an extended vacation. Or something. Sure. That's what's happened. *headdeskheaddeskheaddesk*
-I will not send a postcard to Steven Moffat with nothing on it but "Blinovitch Limitation Effect" written on it over and over in 24-point Arial Black all caps. Maybe with an admonition to re-watch Mawdryn Undead and Father's Day. It's been months since this was aired and I'm sure fans have given him an earful about it already. Sorry, momentary lapse, I'm fine. *ETA: Hypothetical card that will probably not ever be sent may be seen at the end of this reaction post.
-It's just... YEESH.
-Okay, maybe the kid's actually, like, a solid hologram and is actually in the Tardis, safe and sound, and his older self is grabbing onto an, I dunno, hard light or something projection, and Blinovitch doesn't need to stick his nose in at all. Sure. *HANDWAVES REALLY REALLY HARD*
-Right, where were we? Ah yes, emotional epiphanies.
-See, traditional therapists would kill for a breakthrough like that, I'm sure. Temporal therapy. Bring it on.
-"They're isomorphic, they're tuned to your brainwaves." Oh crap. HAHAHAHAHAHA. Now that he wants to stop the crash, he can't because the machine is set on 'ruthless heartless bastard'. I'm just going to ignore that the machine would be tuned to whatever version of Kazran made it to the present day, remembering meeting his mean old self... who wouldn't have existed to see... wait that's a paradox. So... okay, yes fine, I can buy that his brain's scrambled beyond the machine being able to recognize it. Why not. He's had a rough night. XD
-"What, half a screwdriver?" With a shark on the other half. Or whatever ate the shark after it died because how long do smog-sharks live? Normal sharks live around thirty, and it's been 60 years since the shark ate half the screwdriver. Maybe smog-sharks live an extra-long time.
-"We need her to sing." Well of course you do. It was inevitable.
-Okay, fine. *WIBBLE* Are you happy?
-Yes, emotional touching moments later, stopping crashing ship now, yes?
-*snerk* Screwdriver karaoke. Like hairbrush karaoke, but with more sonic. And an audience. Of SHARKS! \o/
-Yes, fine with the uncappable snowing. Sing to a shark, unlock a cloud, make it snow. Wheee! The random, it tickles.
-He does smug well. Perhaps pre-emptively, but well.
-It's okay, Rory. The Doctor gets all the credit and you get all the kissing. That's sort of fair.
-Great, get all the people out playing in the streets and then summon a shark. Of course it's stoned on music right now, and it's a Christmas episode, so it won't be eating anyone, but the timing is a bit fate-tempting.
-He left behind the shark buggy. Not sure if that's littering or inviting reckless idiots to winnow themselves out of the gene pool.
-"But why are you dressed like that at all?" *rapid subject change* *snerk*
-*babble about a moon that's not a moon, that's made of honey, but not really and a bit carnivorous* Sounds ideal for... something.
-"It'll be their last day together, won't it?" Has no one even asked what she's dying of? Maybe it's something dead easy to cure in the year 12,475.
-"Everything's got to end sometime, otherwise nothing would ever get stopped." True... also entropy. And some problems can't be fixed.
-"A little trip." They've gone on a sleigh ride with the shark haven't they? Yep. Well, if you know you're going to die in 24 hours, why not do the most reckless things you can think of.
We never did see what was nibbling on Eleven down in the fog-lake, did we...?
*ETA: What do you think? Too subtle?
And an icon just because.
All questions and ponderings are rhetorical, please don't answer them, and please no discussion of episodes I haven't got to yet, aka, nothing for DW Series 6 and onward.
Index of Series Five Reaction posts is now complete. Woo! \o/ A new post will be started whenever I get around to Series 6.
Contains profanity and things. Possibly innuendo.
I'm going to try to reign it in on the screencapping on this and following reaction posts, due to continuing LJ errors with batch uploaders. :-P
Doctor Who Series Five Christmas Special - A Christmas Carol
Okay, lets start this.
*one minute later, tosses the idea of trying to restrict screencaps* Sigh.
-Lovely cotton-candy-storm planet with excellent views of the Horsehead nebula (which probably wouldn't look like that unless we're in a direct line between it and Earth, but whatever.)
-Slight turbulence. Ha.
-Is it just me or is it looking a bit like the Enterprise-D bridge in here. There's even a guy with half a Visor.
-"Christmas is cancelled." Great, how does that stop the ship from crashing? It's not crashing into London, probably, so the Christmas curse wouldn't be negated by it not being Christmas. Also hard to convince a crashing spaceship. Captain: 'No, no, it's all right, you don't need to crash now, Christmas is cancelled!'/Ship: '...bollocks. Well, next year then. *engines reboot*'
-"What kind of clouds?" Dude, you're trying to keep a spaceship from crashing, hardly the time for recreational meteorology.
-HA! Let me- no actually, I don't even think I'll bother guessing. XD
-*facepalm* Well, it is their honeymoon. Costumes optional.
-"Are you from the honeymoon suite?"/"Oh, shut up." Hee!
-And of course Rory in the Roman garb. Not sure what kind of kinky scenarios can be concocted involving those two costume sets, but that's entirely up to the two of them and any kinkmemes that might exist.
-"Does this mean he's coming or does it mean I need to change the bulb?" I missed you Rory! *smishes*
-*snerk*
-Ooo, pretty.
-Halfway out of the dark. Exactly. *nods*
-"I call it expecting something for nothing!" And hello Scrooge-like being of the hour.
-4500 whatevers must be worth a hell of a lot to put up a family member's freedom as collateral. I suppose people have gone to jail for stealing less, but putting a member of the family into deep freeze? Looking at it from a solely economic standpoint, yes, the person won't be needing to eat or be clothed, but cryostasis can't be too cheap to maintain. Also, taking her out of the potential workforce reduced the family's capacity to pay back the loan because she won't be able to find any sort of employment, so keeping her frozen is not only costing him money to keep her there, it's keeping him from getting paid back sooner.... *shakes head hard* God. Never ever take an economics course. Ever. :-P
-He does keep interestingly-garbed flunkies. That floor length rubber apron isn't unnerving at aaaaall.
-"Or it'll crash, sir."/"Oh. Well it's a kind of landing, isn't?" True. Very hard on whatever it's landing on though.
-HA! Down the chimney indeed. Incidentally, fire does that with most small particles, though not quite that emphatically. Used to toss handfuls of dirt into campfires to watch the sparkle.
-"My whole brain just went 'what the hell?'" Eleven. Hee. *headshake*
-"Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or, as I've always known him, Jeff." So is this conformation that Santa's a Time Lord? Named Jeff? How'd he escape the Time War then?
-"A big flashy lighty thing, that's what bought me here." Eleven is, on many occasions, a bit like a toddler. On espresso. Made with caffeinated water.
-"Big flashy lighty things have got me written all over them. Not actually. Give me time. And a crayon." *nods* Toddler.
-Must say, aside from a bit of deep disdain, our Scrooge of the evening doesn't seem any too bothered by this loud, babbling, insane breach in his stronghold's security.
-"In 900 years of time and space, I've never met anyone who wasn't important before." Aw. I think. Kind of directly contradicts a few things he's said now and then over the years, but oh well.
-*giggles at entire isomorphic discussion* Of course you've heard of isomorphic, silly, but never mind. *pats*
-"Without your help they're going to die."/"Yes." Ooo. Eleven's about to kick some cloud-baron posterior, methinks.
-"Four thousand and four." Yep. Serious looks good on him.
-"Whatever happens tonight, remember, you brought it on yourself." *facepalm* Making Eleven the ghost of Marley?
-I very much appreciate the sentiment, kid, but you've got to learn to pick your battles. This could very well get you frozen alongside your aunt.
-"But you didn't hit the boy." Yep. There has to be a spark of something to work from if we're going to do Christmas Carol.
-"The chairs." And it's swirly holographic zoom-o-vision time again.
-As I said, serious and intense looks good on Eleven. He should do it more often.
-"Halfway out of the dark." *grins like a crazy person*
-Heheh. According to the hard to cap text on its side, the crashing (and managing to stretch out the crash quite a long while, good for it!) spaceship is a 'Starliner: Galaxy Class'. No wonder the bridge looks a bit like the Enterprise.
-Either the new Sonic Screwdriver can't do that universal roaming thing that Ten's could (and I'm fairly sure it already has) or Amy really needs a cell phone upgrade. That thing is ridiculous. I got mine for free years ago and it's one-tenth the size of that thing, and doesn't have any knobbly bits. Although maybe Amy just likes things huge with knobbly bits. Erm. *glances at Rory* Heh. *blushes* *
-"Have you got a plan yet?"/"Yes I do."/"Are you lying?"/"Yes I am." Hee!
-"-and he hates me."/"Were you being extra charming and clever?"/"Yeah, how did you know?" *facepalm*
-"Merry Christmas." Hang on. Wasn't it called Crystal something on this planet? Crystal Feast? Yeah. ...hunh. Must be some kind of translation circuit error. Yeah. *moves on*
-"The fog's thick tonight, and there's a fish warning." Yup. Traslation circuits. *nods*
-"He always lets a few fish through the cloud layer when he's in a bad mood." Fish that swim in the clouds. Why not?
-*takes a brief Rory break*
-"Fiiish." *snerk* Okay, this is extra funny to me particularly, because 'fish' is the word most of the people in the place I work use instead of the more typical and less client-friendly pejorative options. So it being said like that connotates exactly like 'fuuuuck' to me on a euphemism level. And rather appropriately, since I doubt people would be hiding from the fish if they weren't a threat of some kind. Sky-pirhanas maybe. You know between these fog-fish and the space whale, someone on the writing staff likes aquatic critters.
-"Why would people be frightened of you tiny little fellas?" *facepalm* Right now I don't know if he's just saved up most of his moments of dumb for his Eleventh self, or whether Time Lords of sufficiently advanced age lose all common sense. It's not like he hasn't run across innocent looking things that turn out to be all vicious and murdery before. *hides and waits for Eleven to get attacked by fog-fish*
-*watches large shadow pass by* Yeah. Or that.
-'Ding Dong Merrily on High' Okay, so, Christmas. People on this planet are close to Western Earth humanity then, surprise! I wonder what the Crystal Feast would have been like? *drifts for a moment*
-"A what?"/"A Christmas Carol!" Pft. BWAHAHAHAHAHAAH! Nothing like having your rescue strategy mapped out for you three millenia ago by a famous Victorian novelist. Who you've met! And fought off an alien invasion with in Cardiff. There's lovely.
-He was an adorable kid, our evil-or-just-traumatised-as-a-child-and-coping-badly overlord.
-The fish like the singing. What fish doesn't like singing, really?
-Yeah, traumatised is one word for it. *moves on*
-You know, for a sky and government controlling overlord, evil or otherwise, his home security is utter crap.
-"Had to recover the data using quantum enfolding and a paper clip." Hee! I might have done that once, with less quantum and more paper clip.
-"Apparently they won the lottery at exactly the same time." Eleven has less compunction about profiteering using temporal mechanics than prior Doctors, but in his defence he's not doing it for his own sake, he's doing it for a bunch of people who work for a nasty overlord who makes them wear rubber aprons, or other people who live with people he needs to become the flatmate of, and I think there's another one or two I'm forgetting. Ten did kind of break the ice though with the lottery win for the Physics teacher he replaced at the school with the Krillitane, and of course the ticket for Donna's wedding present. Temporally-fudged lottery-win philanthropy. Slippery slope, dude. *headshake*
-"There isn't a lottery." *tsks* Yep. Slippery slope.
-Life's most valuable lesson. "Nobody comes." Ow.
-"I'll be back. Way back." Ohhhhh crap. He's not going to do the 'let the guy see his past present future thing, is he? He's going to take him there, or go back and fix his child self. Yes. There's a bit of Time Travel in this show. *headdesk*
-Yes. Fine. MASSIVE PARADOX. But okay. Whatever. Arg. Unleeeeeess... this always happened in that recording and Wee!Supreme!Overlord here forgot the truth through aggressive anti-imaginary friend counseling, (or more likely his dad beat it out of him, grr) and then erased the recording and he didn't remember the bit where someone actually did come. Yeah. *handwaves*
-"She only went and won the lottery."/"THERE ISN'T ANY LOTTERY!" Hahahahahah.
-"Your past is going to change which means your memories are going to change too, bit scary but you'll get the hang of it." ...Psychological counseling and trauma management. With time travel. Never mind healing your inner child, someone can go back and deal with whatever heinous crap was going on when you were an actual child. Absolutely hell yeah, and where do I donate for time travel psychotherapy research. Because no amount of therapy will be better than stopping things that should never happen to a kid or anyone else when they were happening. *moving on*
-"That never happened!" Yes it did, now hush and get temporally therapized or whatever.
-"But it did." There you go! Not so hard, is it?
-"There's a thing called a face-spider, it's like a tiny baby's head with spider legs, and it's specifically evolved to scuttle up the backs of bedroom cupboards." ...And do what? Is he giving Future Overlord Boy something else to transfer his fear of his father to so he won't be obsessed with the fog-fish and need to build a giant sky-control-zapping thingy? O.o
-I love little details like this. The steam-punkish laptop cam is on and showing an image of the room that doesn't have the camera crew in it. Bits of dressing and detail that give it a little more verisimilitude.
-"What are we gonna do, eat crisps and talk about girls? I've never actually done that but I bet it's easy. Girls!" *facepalm*
-"I think you'll find that I'm universally recognized as a mature and responsible adult." *SNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERK* Mature, well, yeah, it's hard to beat 900 years for most bipedal humanoid life forms. Responsible? Oh yeah. He's responsible for lots of things. Adult? "There's no point in being grown-up if you can't be childish sometimes," aside, he's of legal age as considered by the laws of his people, particularly if they were trying to stuff him into the role of Lord President of Gallifrey at a few points. So in a sense, yes it's all true. Babysitter? I suspect he'd be less Mary Poppins and more Cat in the Hat if babysitting was all he was trying to accomplish here.
-Also, that window into the fish-fog is still wide open. Just sayin'.
-"No, it's shorted out, finally a lie too big." HAHAHAHAAHAH! But it was all so justifiable! XD
-"Have you ever seem Mary Poppins?"/"No?"/"Good, 'cause that comparison would have been rubbish." Yes. Cat in the Hat model. Thing One and Thing Two are stuck in orbit though. Hence the babysitting therapy.
-"Fish in the clouds. How do people ever get bored? How did boredom even get invented?" Hee!
-"Dangerous!" Hehe. You only saw the guppies, dude. Wait for it.
-Fishing for fog fish with the sonic screwdriver as bait. Hee. Sonic fishing lures do exist and I know from personal experience when I was a kid that they're very effective, so the principal here is quite sound. Plus, flashy light and the little ones seemed to like the flashing light. Not sure about the big ones though.
-This is just too adorable for words.
-Ah, so he's not afraid of the fish, he missed a shared experience regarding the fish at school, and feels like more of an outcast because of it. And what an awfully convenient timing on that illness. Wonder if Daddy knew something.
-Ahahahahaha. And he's wearing a bow-tie. And now he knows why.
-I've got to admit, the fish are cute. At least the wee ones.
-And SHAAAAAAAAARK! AHAHAHAHAHA! Too fast to tell if it's cute or not. XD
-Not so cute actually. And I think it just ate the sonic screwdriver, so good luck with that, Eleven.
-"Well, concentrating on the plusses, you've definitely got a story of your own now." Ah yes the story of the strange babysitter who came in through the window and lured a smog-shark into his room. Brilliant. Love that one.
-*puts head on desk and laughs at Eleven babbling* "There's a shark in my bedroom!?"/"Oh fine! Focus on that bit!" *laughs more*
-"What do you call it if you don't have any feet and you're taking a run-up?" RAMMING SPEED! \o/
-If it wasn't a determined killing machine already, having some little metal thing stuck in its tummy buzzing and vibrating its organs unpleasantly would certainly not help it have a friendly mood.
-"Concentrating on the plusses... in reach." Oh dear. You're well past the first fifteen hours of your regeneration, you know. You can't grow a new arm if you lose one.
-Great, you made the kid cry. Actually, considering his apparent lack of empathy as an adult overlord... Great! You made the kid cry! And feel bad about a big fish dying! \o/
-"We need a fully functioning life support-"/"You mean like an ice box? Okay!" Oh you sly person. Did you manage to deliberately wound a smog-shark so the kid would show you where the cryo-chambers are? ...Actually I doubt it. But... *side-eyes*
-Considering the Doctor's past few experiences involving Christmas trees, one would think he'd be less likely to run up and put his face next to it. And grope the Christmas balls. Though he could be checking for explosives or remote controls here.
-"The surplus population, that's what my dad calls it." Heh. Nice sideways Dickens quote there. "If they were like to die they had better do so and decrease the surplus population."
-Though really, if his dad was 100% evil, he could just forget about developing the shield thing, let the sharks roam free and they'd take care of the surplus population, so chalk up a point for daddy, I guess? :-P
-"7258!"/"Just what I was after. Thank you!" HA! Smug prat.
-Oh hi fish... what are you doing in a locked room...?
-"The house is built on a fog-lake." Well that's fine then. Who wouldn't want a lake of fog in their basement to keep the spare people frozen.
-Aw, he's got a crush. On a girl his abusive dad's got frozen in the basement. Seems like a healthy basis for a relationship.
-It's signalling the other half. Which is inside a stunned shark on the roof. Yeaaaaaah, that's a lot of boding not going well all of a sudden.
-...How'd it get through the vault door? Or is there another way in, in which case why didn't they come in that way? Maybe Future Overlord Kid doesn't know about the other way in? Or someone forgot to shut the door. MEH. Whatever. It got in. RUN!
-*facepalm* Kid, when something is chasing you, never back up into anywhere. Because even if it's a giant flying smog-shark, it will still sneak up on you from behind. Somehow.
-*snerk* Shark's a bit of a lowrider. Or part flounder. The fog's less than 2 feet deep there.
-...*blink* Okay then! They like music, and the kid's dream girl is a shark-whisperer.
-"*Eleven babbles about ice crystal vibrations*"/"Look, fish like the singing, okay? Now shut up!"/"*gawps and wabbles* Okaaaaay." Heeee! Congratulations, kid. Galaxy-spanning empires haven't managed to shut him up. And of course the whatever's 'biting' Eleven is actually something to do with the ice crystals vibrating, yeah?
-Hello major change in his life... kind of unnerving that she's still wearing her 'freezing day' clothes in the picture, though. Maybe he keeps her frozen and just hauls her out whenever he feels like it? Maybe like that guy on Torchwood that Tosh was dating once a year. It'd help with the initial age difference, but... *shudders* Still a long ways to go to fix our broken overlord.
-"I keep amazing out here." Yeaaaah, show off.
-Nifty steampunky camera. Not a terribly ergonomic design, but what the heck, it has rivets.
-"You are a doctor, you say. Are you one of mine?" Ahhhh, maybe the early ones are picked for cryo-freezing for health reasons? Hm.
-"He comes every Christmas eve!" Well, then, looks like it's, what, couple hours each Christmas eve, going back as long as a twelve year old can clearly remember, so maybe ten years, that's twenty hours worth of Christmas eve with our mini-overlord. Also, payback. What Eleven is doing is changing the guy's memories in the future, now he's getting unexpected news about what he's going to do from a kid who didn't know who he was a little while ago, and is now going to go back and do the things the kid said he did. I love time travel.
-Or the kid said that to make sure the Eleven would come back and get her out every year and awwwwwww. Probably primarily motivated by self-interest, but still, awwww.
-Yep. Not an ID number, it's a countdown.
-"Except at Christmas." Sleigh ride. In the sky. With a smog-shark pulling the sleigh. Um. *headdesk* SURE! WHY NOT?
Swishing through the sky,
with a one-shark open sleigh,
into the clouds we go,
laughing all the way.
HA HA HA.
-*wibbles* I don't quite know why yet, but *wibbles*
-"How can I have new memories?" Well, if it's at all reassuring, I can confirm that you haven't been hitting the wrong Pensieve. (Yes, I recognized the actor as the guy who plays Dumbledore. I didn't recognize his face without the plethora of hair but the voice is unmistakeable.)
-Considering the kid isn't doing a lot of growing between Christmas eves and would now be 14, I almost wonder if it isn't all the same Christmas Eve and they're just saying it's another, since she wouldn't really notice. Though to be honest it is hard to find child actors who can manage a year's worth of growing between takes, including the beginnings of puberty. Tsk. Slackers, all of them. XD
-"Merry Christmas!"/"Doctor!" Fezzes for everyone! You know, much as Christmas is fun and all, if my only conscious day was spent on Christmas eve doing Christmas things, I'd get good and sick of Christmas after a few iterations. Though shark sleigh rides and trips through all of time and space aren't often on my holiday dance card.
-"Merry Christmas!"/"Doctor!" Scarves! \o/ And someone's had a growth spurt at 16! And is shy now, aw. And our frozen girl is now at 4, yes? You'd think one of them might notice.
-Yep. Four. Hehe. And they had scarves for when it turned Four. How appropriate. Maybe Eleven's noticed subliminally?
-"Merry Christmas!"/"...Kazran!" Heeeeee! Yeah, he's not doing so bad at this growing up business now, is he? Just in time for your clock to start getting very close to running out.
-Oh. Yeah, this will help with the empathy issue. Seriously, though, what, five Christmases and they've never once taken her to see her family?
-"When girls are crying are you supposed to talk to them?"/"I have absolutely no idea." Heeee. Depends on context.
-*facepalm* Well, there you are, why not make up for five years of missing out directly.
-"His father treats everyone like cattle. One day that boy'll do the same."/"No, he's different." Well he is now. Or at least he's getting there. And, on the Dickens parallel, we've reached an approximation of Christmas Present. The Cratchit family. Whose Christmas lights might not even be LED, in the year four thousand whatever, so that's either really poor, or secretly wealthy enough to have 3000 year old antique light strings and not care about the environment.
-"We'll have it tonight!" Dude, whatever you might be roasting better get going quick. Good thing you were already peeling the potato-like objects though!
-Thousands of years in the future, different world, fish flying through the sky, and Christmas is still all hats and crackers and brussells sprouts. Which is sweet, but I would really like to see one of these Christmas specials branch out a bit one of these times and show some future traditions or a different sort of winter festival. You'd think at least brussells sprouts, given their generally renowned unpopularity would have died out or not been saved for seed stock on colony ships or what have you. Though this is a dictatorship with an evil abusive overlord, currently. Maybe the sprouts are mandatory? (Personally, I like them, but there are wars fought less bitterly than getting my brother-in-law or nephew to eat a single one.)
-Also, crackers get popped before filling plates, not after, otherwise you'll lose the toy in the mashed potatoes and get gravy on the paper hat. Heheh. You know, I'm wondering if Eleven didn't add some things to this dinner himself in terms of trappings and trim. It would explain the very Commonwealth Traditional look to it. He almost definitely had to cook the turkey/meat beast in the foreground. Stick it in the Tardis oven, send the Tardis off somewhere for however many hours, have it come right come right back. Roasted meat beast in 10 seconds flat. Beats all hell out of a microwave.
-"Your card I believe?"/"No." Poor Eleven tries too hard sometimes.
-*snerk* A bit loomy, but you're getting there.
-Erm, Eleven, I believe that the technical term here is 'gooseberry'?
-Kissing advice from Eleven: "Try and be all nervous and rubbish and a bit shaky, because you're gonna be like that anyway and that's what'll make it part of the plan and then it'll fail on purpose." ...this mindset suits Eleven, really. Plan to have no plan and then succeed by failing. *nods*
-"It's this or go to your room and design a new kind of screwdiver." *snerk* Hey, don't down the sonic screwdriver! Especially after you fed it to a freaking shark. *googles* It was referred to by name on TV the first time by the second Doctor in Fury of the Deep, but the same prop was used in the second series of the first Doctor's run, so it wasn't necessarily anyone in-series that he was too nervous to snog. I'll bet the fanfic writers had a field day with that.
-*mutters I will not mock the photoshopping I will not mock the photoshopping I will not mock the photoshopping... snerk*
-Holy crap, she changed her clothes. O.o
-"The truth." Aaaand hello other shoe. There's a lot of you hanging around, isn't there?
-"I just accidentally got engaged to Marilyn Monroe." After that misunderstanding-or-was-it with River, you'd think you'd have learned.
-"How do you keep going like that do you breathe out your ears or something?" *facepalm*
-"I'll just go and get married, shall I? See how you like that." Hee! *headshake*
-Heeheeeheeeheeeheeee. Fishie! \o/
-"Got some work now with my dad, get that cloud belt under control." Why do you not just say why? Now he's going to think you'll still grow up to be an evil bastard and try something completely useless rather than curing your once-a-year girlfriend. Then again he could have stuck around and listened to what the problem is rather than running off and marrying a movie star. And she could have told her problem to the guy with the magic go-anywhere box who might be able to do something about it instead of the powerless overlord-scion. THEY'RE ALL IDIOTS!
-"I won't need you." Ouch.
-"What's happened, what are you not telling me?" SERIOUSLY, YOU KNOW THERE'S A METER THING RIGHT THERE! WHY ARE YOU NOT LOOKING AT IT YOU OBLIVIOUS TWONK???
-Aw, woobie-face future overlord... TELL YOUR MAGIC CHRISTMAS EVE BABYSITTER WHAT'S GOING ON!!!
-And the abusive jerk is back on the wall. Great. ARG!
-"People are cattle. If you want to control the cattle, control their predators." Sound strategy, yeah, but *shivers*
-"This planet is ours."/"Excuse me, father. I've just remembered I've got some urgent thwarting to do." Sorry, that second bit wasn't actually in there, I have no idea where that could possibly have come from... XD
-I see also the minions' aprons were slightly shorter and possibly leather during evil father's reign. Ah well, fashions change.
-Yay! Now who's going to get the signal first, Eleven or the smog-shark with the other bit of screwdriver in it?
-Of course. Kazran didn't even have to activate it. Eleven probably had it set for 'detect intent stare' before he handed it over. *nods*
-"*'told you you'd need me' smirk*"/"*glare* *curtain face*" HA! Eleven, honey? That's what you get for being a stalker. *pats* XD
-"It's not going to crash on my house so what's it got to do with me?" Yeah, still a ways to go on the rehabilitation there.
-"As a very old friend of mine took a very long time to explain, life isn't fair." Ohhhhh. Yeah. Need to work on that.
-"I'm the Ghost of Christmas Present." Okay so we actually are getting one of those then. And it's holographic Amy in a kissogram costume. Could be worse. Though if they keep to pattern, Rory's going to lose a lot of time explaining why, as the ghost of Christmas Future, he's dressed as a Roman Centurion. The resurgence of the trans-galactic Roman Empire perhaps.
-Or not. Hi Rory! "Eyes off the skirt!" Which one, hers or yours?
-Hard to send away carol singers without offering cookies or something, but leaving them all on their crashing spaceship (how long is that thing gonna crash for?), that's cold. Must say, they're doing really well at keeping on pitch for being on a crashing spaceship. Maybe the hologram projector has 5th millennium auto-tune?
-"Time can be rewritten."/"You tell the Doctor, you tell him from me. People can't!" Hmmm... there's thinkiness in there somewhere.
-"And she would live a single day." Yep. And how hard was that to tell someone, silly boy? Ooo! Ooo! The Ghost of Christmas Future's going to be Eleven swooping in and taking Abigail to a higher-tech level medical facility and fixing her, right?
-Not as easy to dismiss others lives and suffering when you're sharing their experience, is it? On a slightly nerve-wracking note, exactly what is Rory doing poking at a random console? Ohhhh, Rory widen the beam. I heard 'Murray'. No idea why.
-*harmonious fish resonance trying to sing them out of crashing but it's no good babble* "Why are they still singing then?"/"Because we haven't told them." Oooooof. And a bit of Titanic there too, randomly.
-"Nobody has to die."/"Everybody has to die."/"Not tonight."/"Tonight's as good as any other night." All true. Still, hard. Also, still broken.
-"I'm sorry. I didn't realise." Well you didn't exactly ask either. OR LOOK AT THE STUPID METER! Aaaaaaaaaaaarg. *headdesk*
-"Better a broken heart than no heart at all." There are people in the world who would probably slap you for saying that.
-"Try it. You try it." Pretty sure he has to some extent over the 900+ years.
-"I don't and never ever will care!" Oh dear. You've issued him a challenge now. You're screwed.
-"So what do you think?" Oh crap, Eleven's defrosted her while Kazran was a hologram. And she's gonna kick his ass and then get healed by future medicine. Woohoo! \o/
-Or not. Awesome. Just thinking about seeing the experience as the memory of it happening is being written in his memory is giving me a headache. It's like a feedback squeal.
-Um, um, Blinovitch effect! Don't let them touch!!
-"Dad?" Oooooooooo buuuuuuuuuurn.
-*headdesk* Well, I guess Blinovitch has had it with all the universe getting ended or squished or whatever business and has gone on an extended vacation. Or something. Sure. That's what's happened. *headdeskheaddeskheaddesk*
-I will not send a postcard to Steven Moffat with nothing on it but "Blinovitch Limitation Effect" written on it over and over in 24-point Arial Black all caps. Maybe with an admonition to re-watch Mawdryn Undead and Father's Day. It's been months since this was aired and I'm sure fans have given him an earful about it already. Sorry, momentary lapse, I'm fine. *ETA: Hypothetical card that will probably not ever be sent may be seen at the end of this reaction post.
-It's just... YEESH.
-Okay, maybe the kid's actually, like, a solid hologram and is actually in the Tardis, safe and sound, and his older self is grabbing onto an, I dunno, hard light or something projection, and Blinovitch doesn't need to stick his nose in at all. Sure. *HANDWAVES REALLY REALLY HARD*
-Right, where were we? Ah yes, emotional epiphanies.
-See, traditional therapists would kill for a breakthrough like that, I'm sure. Temporal therapy. Bring it on.
-"They're isomorphic, they're tuned to your brainwaves." Oh crap. HAHAHAHAHAHA. Now that he wants to stop the crash, he can't because the machine is set on 'ruthless heartless bastard'. I'm just going to ignore that the machine would be tuned to whatever version of Kazran made it to the present day, remembering meeting his mean old self... who wouldn't have existed to see... wait that's a paradox. So... okay, yes fine, I can buy that his brain's scrambled beyond the machine being able to recognize it. Why not. He's had a rough night. XD
-"What, half a screwdriver?" With a shark on the other half. Or whatever ate the shark after it died because how long do smog-sharks live? Normal sharks live around thirty, and it's been 60 years since the shark ate half the screwdriver. Maybe smog-sharks live an extra-long time.
-"We need her to sing." Well of course you do. It was inevitable.
-Okay, fine. *WIBBLE* Are you happy?
-Yes, emotional touching moments later, stopping crashing ship now, yes?
-*snerk* Screwdriver karaoke. Like hairbrush karaoke, but with more sonic. And an audience. Of SHARKS! \o/
-Yes, fine with the uncappable snowing. Sing to a shark, unlock a cloud, make it snow. Wheee! The random, it tickles.
-He does smug well. Perhaps pre-emptively, but well.
-It's okay, Rory. The Doctor gets all the credit and you get all the kissing. That's sort of fair.
-Great, get all the people out playing in the streets and then summon a shark. Of course it's stoned on music right now, and it's a Christmas episode, so it won't be eating anyone, but the timing is a bit fate-tempting.
-He left behind the shark buggy. Not sure if that's littering or inviting reckless idiots to winnow themselves out of the gene pool.
-"But why are you dressed like that at all?" *rapid subject change* *snerk*
-*babble about a moon that's not a moon, that's made of honey, but not really and a bit carnivorous* Sounds ideal for... something.
-"It'll be their last day together, won't it?" Has no one even asked what she's dying of? Maybe it's something dead easy to cure in the year 12,475.
-"Everything's got to end sometime, otherwise nothing would ever get stopped." True... also entropy. And some problems can't be fixed.
-"A little trip." They've gone on a sleigh ride with the shark haven't they? Yep. Well, if you know you're going to die in 24 hours, why not do the most reckless things you can think of.
We never did see what was nibbling on Eleven down in the fog-lake, did we...?
*ETA: What do you think? Too subtle?
And an icon just because.
All questions and ponderings are rhetorical, please don't answer them, and please no discussion of episodes I haven't got to yet, aka, nothing for DW Series 6 and onward.
Index of Series Five Reaction posts is now complete. Woo! \o/ A new post will be started whenever I get around to Series 6.