Random Fanfic: Non-Crossovers
Title: Non-Crossovers
Warnings/Rating: GEN, PG. Crossovers (sort of), first one is in conversation format, Crack?
Disclaimer: Not mine.
(A/N after cut. Merged into one post from earlier posting.)
SPN/Buckaroo Banzai
A/N: Almost no one will have a clue what this is about. Sorry. My only excuse is the damn movie was on TV tonight and I've been fiddling with this little thought since July. And I may have been a fan of the movie once. In 1990, okay?? I had a t-shirt. And a badge. And a crush on Peter Weller. Shut up. Not part of the Conversations series. [LJ-only]
"No."
"Why not, Dean?"
"Okay. One, his band sucks. Two, he's a freaking comic book character and three... just, no!"
"But-"
"No, Sam. He's not a hunter. He's got, like, some kinda science lab thing going on. Aliens and stuff. Not a hunter."
"It's an invitation to join the Banzai Institute, Dean! Do you know how rarely they even contact people outside the organization, let alone invite them in?"
"I don't care. We are not responding to the message, and we are not working for anyone, especially not a grown man who calls himself 'Buckaroo'."
"But-!"
"He's got his own geek-patrol for aliens, that's fine. We handle different stuff, real stuff that's a hell of a lot more of a problem than alien invasions or international crime rings or whatever. We don't have time to chase around on a tour-bus analyzing alien snot."
"You seriously don't want to respond? Even to just leave him some contact info? Maybe we could be a part of the Blue Blaze Irregulars?"
"No. No freaking way."
"But why not? They have to run into stuff that isn't criminals or aliens sometimes. Blue Blaze Irregular status would be like another hunting contact."
"Yeah, sure. A contact that calls up and asks you to drop everything and haul to wherever the big boss says to go and bail his buddies out of jail or count corn stalks in crop circles. No thanks."
"Dean-"
"You have seen the hats, right Sam?"
- - -
(Yeah, that's all for that one.)
SPN/Ranma 1/2
A/N: While I'm being random, here, have another 'crossover avoidance' thing. This has been sitting around since last summer too. And again, almost no one will know what this is about. [LJ-only]
"Cursed springs?" Dean raised an eyebrow.
"Yep, place called Jusenkyo, in China." Sam held out a sheaf of printouts. "A different drowned spirit haunts each spring and anyone falling in gets cursed, turns into whatever drowned there whenever they get wet with cold water. Hot water turns them back."
"That's messed up."
"Yeah."
Dean took the list of confirmed spirits from Sam and looked it over. "Dude, how does a duck drown?"
Sam shrugged.
"This is a well-known thing though, right Sam? Loads of lore?"
"Yes and no. Locals know all about it, there's a guide there and everything who warns people away."
"So people stay away from it. No problem."
"Well..." Sam shifted his feet.
"Well what?"
"There's a few martial arts schools that still use it as a training ground."
"What?"
"Have for hundreds of years."
"You're kidding, right? People are deliberately still going there?" asked Dean flatly.
"Yeah."
"So there's a bunch of wannabe-ninja-" Dean looked down at the list. "- were-pigs running around over there?"
"Apparently so."
"They don't go on murdering rampages when they turn into... cats, red-headed girls and pandas, do they?"
"No, no," Sam shook his head, "It's more of a curse then a true 'were-form' thing."
"Pass it to Bobby, maybe he knows someone who knows someone who knows a hunter over in Japan."
"This has been going on for centuries. Someone over there should have dealt with it by now but obviously they haven't. Maybe they need help."
"The people being affected by this are people who went there deliberately. They got themselves cursed, let them deal with it."
Sam sighed.
Dean looked down at the list again and snorted. "'Spring of Drowned Duck.'"
"We could go do something about it, though, right? Break the curses?"
Dean raised an eyebrow. "How long is a transpacific flight?"
"When we land it'll be the same time we took off."
"How long would the plane be in the air, Sam?"
"Several hours."
"How many is several?"
"Uh. Eleven?"
Dean handed the list back to Sam. "No."
"But-"
"No. Plus the last thing we need is you falling in that spring of drowned yeti."
"That's the Spring of Drowned Yeti Holding an Eel and Crane while Riding an Ox."
"Whatever."
- - -
(there. done.)
Warnings/Rating: GEN, PG. Crossovers (sort of), first one is in conversation format, Crack?
Disclaimer: Not mine.
(A/N after cut. Merged into one post from earlier posting.)
SPN/Buckaroo Banzai
A/N: Almost no one will have a clue what this is about. Sorry. My only excuse is the damn movie was on TV tonight and I've been fiddling with this little thought since July. And I may have been a fan of the movie once. In 1990, okay?? I had a t-shirt. And a badge. And a crush on Peter Weller. Shut up. Not part of the Conversations series. [LJ-only]
"No."
"Why not, Dean?"
"Okay. One, his band sucks. Two, he's a freaking comic book character and three... just, no!"
"But-"
"No, Sam. He's not a hunter. He's got, like, some kinda science lab thing going on. Aliens and stuff. Not a hunter."
"It's an invitation to join the Banzai Institute, Dean! Do you know how rarely they even contact people outside the organization, let alone invite them in?"
"I don't care. We are not responding to the message, and we are not working for anyone, especially not a grown man who calls himself 'Buckaroo'."
"But-!"
"He's got his own geek-patrol for aliens, that's fine. We handle different stuff, real stuff that's a hell of a lot more of a problem than alien invasions or international crime rings or whatever. We don't have time to chase around on a tour-bus analyzing alien snot."
"You seriously don't want to respond? Even to just leave him some contact info? Maybe we could be a part of the Blue Blaze Irregulars?"
"No. No freaking way."
"But why not? They have to run into stuff that isn't criminals or aliens sometimes. Blue Blaze Irregular status would be like another hunting contact."
"Yeah, sure. A contact that calls up and asks you to drop everything and haul to wherever the big boss says to go and bail his buddies out of jail or count corn stalks in crop circles. No thanks."
"Dean-"
"You have seen the hats, right Sam?"
- - -
(Yeah, that's all for that one.)
SPN/Ranma 1/2
A/N: While I'm being random, here, have another 'crossover avoidance' thing. This has been sitting around since last summer too. And again, almost no one will know what this is about. [LJ-only]
"Cursed springs?" Dean raised an eyebrow.
"Yep, place called Jusenkyo, in China." Sam held out a sheaf of printouts. "A different drowned spirit haunts each spring and anyone falling in gets cursed, turns into whatever drowned there whenever they get wet with cold water. Hot water turns them back."
"That's messed up."
"Yeah."
Dean took the list of confirmed spirits from Sam and looked it over. "Dude, how does a duck drown?"
Sam shrugged.
"This is a well-known thing though, right Sam? Loads of lore?"
"Yes and no. Locals know all about it, there's a guide there and everything who warns people away."
"So people stay away from it. No problem."
"Well..." Sam shifted his feet.
"Well what?"
"There's a few martial arts schools that still use it as a training ground."
"What?"
"Have for hundreds of years."
"You're kidding, right? People are deliberately still going there?" asked Dean flatly.
"Yeah."
"So there's a bunch of wannabe-ninja-" Dean looked down at the list. "- were-pigs running around over there?"
"Apparently so."
"They don't go on murdering rampages when they turn into... cats, red-headed girls and pandas, do they?"
"No, no," Sam shook his head, "It's more of a curse then a true 'were-form' thing."
"Pass it to Bobby, maybe he knows someone who knows someone who knows a hunter over in Japan."
"This has been going on for centuries. Someone over there should have dealt with it by now but obviously they haven't. Maybe they need help."
"The people being affected by this are people who went there deliberately. They got themselves cursed, let them deal with it."
Sam sighed.
Dean looked down at the list again and snorted. "'Spring of Drowned Duck.'"
"We could go do something about it, though, right? Break the curses?"
Dean raised an eyebrow. "How long is a transpacific flight?"
"When we land it'll be the same time we took off."
"How long would the plane be in the air, Sam?"
"Several hours."
"How many is several?"
"Uh. Eleven?"
Dean handed the list back to Sam. "No."
"But-"
"No. Plus the last thing we need is you falling in that spring of drowned yeti."
"That's the Spring of Drowned Yeti Holding an Eel and Crane while Riding an Ox."
"Whatever."
- - -
(there. done.)