Don't think of me anymore (1/1)
(Don't think of me any less) Onew/key, Angst, smut, romance, ♫ ► hungry ghost - I don't think of you anymore but, I don't think of you any less (please listen to this one!) warning: character death
Jinki is alone.
Jinki is walking down the deserted street downtown, and it is dark, very dark.
There is a hiss coming from the ground, there is a howl coming from the moon.
Jinki's eyes and ears are sharp, even in the heavy dense fog that covers him, that covers the whole place.
Jinki is in a ghost town, with ghost people and ghost eyes.
Jinki is never seen, never heard of, never believed in, but he lives.
Alone.
Jinki stops in front of a run down building, and he imagines what the place must have looked like before.
Roses of every color blooming every where, the air filled with the mouth-watering scent of freshly baked bread and freshly brewed black coffee. If you tried really hard, you can even smell the faint sweet scent of cakes and strawberry. Jinki doesn't need to try harder to know what this building had been before.
A famous bakery.
His mind registers an image of a busy looking bakery, filled with people to the brim, every chairs and tables occupied, their eyes sparkling like magic while sipping on a mug of coffee with whip cream on top.
It doesn't really look the same way it did before but it still feels the same, Jinki thinks as he runs a finger across a very dusty glass table placed outside. He takes one quick glance at the wilted roses placed inside small fenced gardens, and he thinks they died a little more with the help of his dark eyes.
Gracefully, he walked towards the glass door, the glass door piled with dusts, 'open' it says. It squeaks loudly with a push, but Jinki doesn't mind. No one is here to hear him anyway, he is alone.
There, in the middle of the counter right beside the broken cash register, stands a figurine of a pale ballerina with her blonde hair tied up, a foot in the air, arms forming a circle just above her head, and eyes serenely closed.
Jinki walks to the counter without hesitance, eyes set on the figurine, and the wooden floor squeaks painfully under his weight.
Once he is close enough, he trails a finger across the ballerina's arms, legs, stomach and wipes the dusts away from her face. Her cheekbones are slopes, from her forehead to her sharp chin, and they are shaded tart pink. Her lips are fire red, and her eyes are ocean blue. She has real eyelashes, too.
Beautiful, fragile and elegant under the touch of his finger.
He takes the small hand of the ballerina, feeling the distinct shape of her fingers bent upwards.
Let us dance, he says, whispers across nothing. Dance until our blood bleeds red, until our lips turn blue.
Jinki delicately cleans the figurine, making sure she is dust free, from her tiny fingers down to the point of her foot.
Lovely, he says once he finishes cleaning up. He doesn't mind his dirtied shirt as he stares at the figurine in his hands with fascination.
And he is back from the start, back from before everything collapsed, back from where he felt real emotions instead of numbness.
Jinki?, someone whispers from behind the counter. A boy with lime green hair and electric blue eyes. He has sharp cheekbones and pouty lips. Jinki also notes that he is wearing a white apron, dust-free, and a toque neatly propped on top of his head. He is strangely immaculate.
Jinki remembers that he has something breakable in his hands and tries his very best not to drop it or crush it. He removes his eyes from electricity, and carefully settling the ballerina on top of the counter, from where it came from.
Do I know you? He asks, his voice neutral and his eyes questioning. The boy only grins and points a slim finger at the name tag pinned on his breast pocket. Kibum? It is honey-like on his tongue, sweet, and bees are stinging it.
Where have you been? Kibum asks, going around the counter to meet Jinki's full height. He is almost as tall as Jinki, I've been waiting for you.
For centuries.
I've been alone, Jinki answers, fingers aching to touch the out of place colored hair of Kibum. Walking around in this ghost town.
Ghost town? Kibum's voice is almost sarcastic, mocking him. What ghost town are you talking about?
This -, Jinki looks back and all he sees are people, lining up behind him, waiting for their turn to order, and he smells roses and fresh bread and coffee and strawberries on cakes. And there is a chandelier hanging above their heads, sparkling gold, and the door doesn't squeak, and the floorboards are as sturdy as ever.
Jinki looks in front fast enough to see Kibum smiling at him, so, are you having your usual?
Jinki is confused, but he nods, pushing his hands into the pockets of his heavy coat.
Don't worry, Kibum pats his cheeks, a very caring action, he thinks, it's on the house.
Jinki's usual turns out to be iced coffee with chocolate chips and thick whip cream on top and a plain croissant on the side. Kibum is the one to serve him, and the longer Jinki stays in his seat, the longer he thinks that Kibum is the only working person in this bakery because he sees him everywhere that the other people are almost faceless and Kibum's face is the only face he remembers and sees.
How are you, Kibum starts, not leaving Jinki's side even after he's already placed the plates on the table, I missed you.
Really? Jinki fingers the green plastic straw, stirring his coffee slowly.
Are you staying? Kibum looks directly at his eyes and he is paralyzed, I want you to stay, so can you?
Sure, Jinki answers. He isn't sure what he's doing, but he thinks, why not.
Really? Kibum sounds ecstatic, he looks ecstatic. And even his fingertips feel overwhelming on Jinki's skin, it burns. You can stay at mine's, because I asked you to stay, is that alright with you, is it?
Jinki nods, eyes still on the way Kibum's fingers circle his wrist and it leaves his hair standing up.
Kibum takes care of the roses, bakes the cakes, and opens the store. Jinki finds it all in the day after their first meeting. First?
Because Kibum pulls on him and takes him outside, where it is shiny and breezy and the roses aren't wilting, aren't dead.
Kibum says he likes the red ones the most, it looks so red, red like blood and burnt like fire.
He thinks that he needed to work harder on the white ones, though. Because he thinks they always look so dirty, so unmanaged, but he is a little in shock when Kibum looks up from watering the roses, lips curled into a shy smile.
And because white is your favorite, he says. His cheeks are painted pink, sweet candy pink and it contrasts with his eyes and it just looks so different in Jinki's eyes.
White?
Yeah, Kibum continues watering the roses, like an angel's wings. Flawless white.
A few days after and Jinki catches Kibum sleeping in his office, face inside the circle of his arms, he notices how Kibum's eyelashes are naturally thick and curled. He spends a few more hours just watching Kibum sleep.
Jinki, Kibum calls him one afternoon. He is in the stock room and holding up a metal ladder. Hold the ladder for me, will you, I just have to get something from up there.
Okay, and Jinki walks to where Kibum is and steadies the ladder under his weight.
Kibum's thighs and legs are slim, Jinki realizes the moment it is the only thing he has to stare at. Kibum is tip-toeing, hands reaching up for something at the very back of the shelves.
Gotcha, he hears him say but Kibum is a little too happy to have gotten what he wanted and stumbles.
Good thing there is Jinki to catch him, and the first thing that comes into Jinki's mind is fragile, and Kibum's features up close are beautiful, and even when he stumbled he looks elegant.
Lovely in his arms.
He delicately sets him up on his feet.
Thank you, Kibum is blushing, and runs off with something in his hands.
He leaves Jinki alone, wondering.
Jinki, Kibum crawls up to him the last night they are together. Jinki, are you awake?
Kibum? He sleepily groans, hands are fists above his eyes, rubbing them awake.
Jinki, Kibum looks almost pleading, Jinki, I need help.
What is it, Kibum?
Help, Kibum stares at him, lifeless.
What kind of help?
Kibum doesn't answer, but he runs a hand up on Jinki's arm, and cups the side of his neck. His lips are suddenly on Jinki's, and he can't think, can't stutter, can't even look.
Jinki feels Kibum's tongue licking at his lower lip, nibbling softly. He ignores the cold feeling it leaves him.
Kibum pulls away for a second, eyes still locked on his, help. His breath hits the wet spot on Jinki's lips.
Jinki shivers lightly at this, and he stares back. Okay, he puts a hand behind Kibum's neck, okay, Kibum. And he pulls Kibum closer, their lips meeting and Kibum's mouth is already open for Jinki's tongue to explore. His sharp teeth scrapes on Kibum's soft lips, and he feels the flesh under his teeth bleed, he can taste it but Kibum pushes himself deeper into Jinki's mouth, hands locked on his shoulders and his crotch painfully digging into the dip of Jinki's own.
When he starts to rotate his hips slowly, and moans into Jinki's mouth like heaven, Jinki loses control.
He pushes Kibum down the bed, pins both hands above his head and licks at the jawbone of Kibum.
Kibum does not struggle, he only angles his head to where Jinki can touch, can feel, can taste more of him.
Jinki leaves a wet trail down to his collar bones, already exposed and he shivers when cold night air hits the spot.
That is when Jinki smells something different, something very opposite to the ever sweet-smelling air full of strawberries and whip cream and roses. He smells fear, and desperation.
Kibum? he stops only to see silent tears coming out of Kibum's closed eyes.
Please, don't stop, he manages to stutter out between whimpers, fingers curling into a fist, and his hips searching for fraction, please help me.
It's the tears that makes Jinki hesitate, but Kibum wraps his slim legs around his waist and pulls him closer, I need help.
Jinki stops to wipe the tears away from Kibum's soft, porcelain-like pale face. It's okay, Kibum.
He licks away the fear, and undresses Kibum delicately going over each button painstakingly slow, like he will break the moment Jinki does a wrong move and applies the wrong pressure. I'm going to make you forget, it's okay.
They are both very naked, and Jinki's thumb is playing with the hard ball of Kibum's nipple, taking the other in his mouth.
Kibum screams please, help me and he takes a fistful of Jinki's hair and scrapes his back.
He urges Jinki down, way down and grips on the white sheets just paper in his hands when Jinki's hair is out of his reach.
Another trail of saliva down his body, from his nipple to the center of his stomach, lining down his stomach and around his bellybutton, stopping a few inches just below it.
Jinki looks up at Kibum, eyes almost asking for permission Kibum's already given, but he still does. Kibum only gives an almost smile.
Your eyes are lovely, Kibum says, out of topic, they're different. They're gray.
Jinki smiles at this, it's the first time someone has mentioned his eyes in the same sentence as beautiful. I love your eyes, too, he grabs Kibum's thighs, and he feels Kibum shiver under the warm pads of his hands. He nuzzles the inner part of Kibum's thighs, licking them too much and leaving kisses all over. Kibum doesn't stop him.
Once he thinks Kibum's thighs are wet enough, he stops teasing, and carefully takes Kibum's manhood in his hand, cupping it and stroking it tenderly.
Is this okay, he asks. Not stopping, not pausing.
Yes, Kibum's breathing is short and ragged. It is, please continue.
And Kibum is begging more once Jinki takes it whole in his mouth, his saliva pooling at his tongue and he lets it slide down Kibum's length, spreading it with a pump of his fist. He continues pumping, flicking a tongue once in a while at the tip of Kibum's cock.
Kibum's moans and pleads are enough to remove the thoughts of taking advantage of him in Jinki's mind, because he's broken, because he's lonely, because he's tired. It's all gone.
He feels Kibum push deeper into his throat and he fights well not to gag, and takes it deeper, until he can feel the tip of his cock at the back of his throat.
Feeling the end of his stored breath, he pulls out with a harsh intake of air, and licks off the precum on the tip of Kibum's cock.
Kibum quickly takes his hands, now slightly sitting up, and sucks and licks on his thick fingers like it's one of his sweet spoons back in the kitchen, the one he's used to spread icing on cakes.
He knows what Kibum wants, because after the wet warmth around his fingers is gone, Kibum is propped on his elbows, ass in front of Jinki's face. Put it in, Jinki.
He doesn't hesitate, pushing a finger and only groaning as he feels the circle of Kibum's hole tighten around it. He fingers Kibum for a few minutes, slightly spits on his second finger and forces it in, Kibum groans in half pleasure and half pain as his asshole is stretched more.
Soon, four of his fingers are plunged in Kibum's hole and Kibum is moving to a silent rhythm, swallowing his fingers only for them to show out later. Disappears, appears. Jinki manages to grab one of his ass cheeks and squeezes on it tightly.
Kibum moans out a, 'insert it in me' and stops rocking his hips. Jinki carefully takes out his wet fingers, licks at it, tasting Kibum for a moment, and head and eyes rolling to the back because Kibum tastes wonderful, before spitting an ample amount of saliva on his hand, he uses this to lube his own thick, hard cock.
He settles the tip of his own cock just in front of Kibum's hole, and Kibum momentarily trembles, his legs looking like they're about to give up as he feels the wetness.
Kibum is the one who moves first, rocking his hips again, hard enough to swallow a small portion of the tip of Jinki's cock. Jinki takes this as an encouragement to continue, placing a hand on top of Kibum's ass, another one directing his cock into Kibum's hole and he hears Kibum scream, and he looks down to see his own length fully swallowed by Kibum.
Jinki feels ecstasy, feels Kibum's flesh wrap around his own, feels the soft cheeks of Kibum's ass hit his crotch, and the noises Kibum makes are just pleasures in his ears.
He holds on Kibum's waist and soon, they are red and white because of his tight hold.
As soon as he feels something inside of him filling in, ready to spill out, Kibum screams his name, his voice bouncing against the walls and Jinki cums inside of Kibum.
Kibum is sitting in his lap, Jinki's arms around his waist, and they are sticky because of the sweat and heat and saliva. Kibum is smiling, but Jinki thinks it's a dangerous smile.
Kibum places a hand on top of his cheeks, a thumb caressing his cheeks.
You're really beautiful, Kibum whispers, and he rests his head on Jinki's shoulder, not minding the sweat sticking to his cheek. And you have sharp teeth.
No, Jinki's mind screams. And he tries to push Kibum away, only that his hand doesn't move and doesn't follow. No, Kibum. I will not
Bite me, Kibum leaves a kiss on his shoulder. Please, Jinki. Take the pain away.
I can't just bite you, Kibum, Jinki argues, his hands a little bit tighter now, I don't want to bite you.
Kibum still smells like desperation, still smells like red, bloody and burning.
Please.
Kibum, you'll die.
Bite me like a delicious, juicy apple, Jinki. Kibum turns to face Jinki, his eyes staring back almost blankly at Jinki's eyes. He traces Jinki's eyebrows, just let me look at you for a while, because your gray eyes are beautiful and it's the last thing I want to see in this hideous world.
Kibum places his lips right next to Jinki's left eye, and goes back to leaning on his shoulders.
Please bite me, now. Kibum whispers, hands tucked under Jinki's arms.
There are tears, in Jinki's eyes. He is sure. There is also tears on his shoulders, it could be sweat, or it could be Kibum's tears.
You're leaving me alone, Jinki whispers back.
I'm not, Kibum is tired, his voice is tired. I'm dying in your arms.
Kibum, Jinki tries one more time, but he is sure it falls on deaf ears.
Please don't think of me anymore, and Kibum is a fragile doll in his arms.
I won't think of you any less, and there is blood. Like Kibum's red roses, Kibum's favorite color, Kibum's red, blood and fire.
Jinki buries Kibum with his roses, so that he will still smell like love until his body leaves, until the roses themselves dies.
Jinki never looks back.
Jinki is broken.
Jinki is walking away from the building, it is cold, very cold.
There is a breaking happening in his heart, and an earthquake approaching his body.
Jinki's mind and fingers are numb, and even in the rose-filled air, he feels numb, he feels empty.
Jinki is in a hole, with nothing but his own and Kibum.
Jinki is never seen, never heard of, never believed in, but he lives.
Broken.
✈ 3051 words
A/N: To be totally honest, this idea came to me after attempting to cut again. I was brought to youtube's magical side and thank you to a friend, I cheered up a bit. Then, I started writing because I've been very lazy for a while, also busy. And yea.
Omg omg. My first ever smut, omg. What. Please, don't throw rocks and bricks at me, please don't chase me with torches and sporks (lolwhat). I'd love it if you leave a comment (it is my first time writing smut, honest)! And I feel like I lack something :-( Also, I was wondering what term of 'manhood' should I use, haha! To keep the feels, okay. Because there's such a wide variety of cocks hahahahaha. And angst, sobs. Don't hurt me! This was supposed to be just a PWP thing, because I've wanted to write smut for a long time now (and/but I still feel very awkward), but look! A plot developed itself, hehe. Also, I hoped you listened to the song while reading this! (Kind of like a Parisian feel, yeah?) ALSO. Onew vampire AU, anybody?! :-D (Also, if anyone is confused. It is present-past-present time setting. Yea)
After this, I'm planning on starting to write other pairings (such as Jongho, lol no. actually, that's the only pairing I'm trying haha!) I hope you guys like Jongho just as much?