Crimson [Sehun/Lu Han, Kai/Lu Han]
Title: Crimson
Pairing: Sehun/Lu Han, Kai/Lu Han
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: ~4000
Disclaimer: I own nothing herein but the plot
Warning: Character death
Summary: Sehun and Jongin are more alike than Lu Han realizes.
He closes the coffee shop door and locks up, humming softly to himself. The night air feels cool on his skin; he takes a moment to inhale exhale inhale.
Ah. He's happy.
He follows the dimly lit streetlights down the deserted city block. It's quieter than usual, he realizes, but that's how some Tuesday nights are. Seoul is big and bright and busy, but the coffee shop he works at after school is tucked away in a dusty crevice, surrounded on all sides by towering silver buildings.
His mother would be anxious if she knew how empty the streets were at this time of night, so he shoots her a quick message.
I'll be home in 10. Don't worry.
He doesn't mind the barely illuminated streets. In fact, he likes it. He likes the relative quiet, the pseudo-calm.
And maybe it's this strange sense of peace that dulls his senses and muffles his instincts.
He doesn't notice the shadow skulking behind him, darting into alleys as it tails him. He doesn't hear the faint click of metal hitting metal echo momentarily as bullets slide into place. He doesn't even catch the out-of-place scents of cinnamon and apples (the smell is uncomfortably familiar, yet not entirely) as it rides on breaths of passing winds.
Lu Han is still humming when gloved hands reach out and slam him up against the rough wall of a dark alley.
Today is a special day, Lu Han wakes up realizing. He runs through his usual morning routine with a lilt to his step that has his mother smiling warmly.
"Sehun's back?"
Lu Han's eyes twinkle when he nods excitedly. Sehun is his best friend and had been for his entire life. Their families have been neighbors since before either of them was born, and their parents are as close as they are.
Lu Han's heart quickens when he recalls that, just a year ago, he and Sehun had almost become something more.
But then Sehun had begun acting strangely, avoiding Lu Han like the proverbial plague and suddenly leaving for a year abroad in France. Lu Han had been horribly confused and painfully heartbroken, the gaping hole left in his life too large for even his slew of new boyfriends to fill in the slightest. But a few months ago, Sehun contacted him and the two have been talking, about anything and everything, every day since.
Today, finally, they would be together once again.
"I want you to come with me, so you can meet him," Lu Han smiles. "My two favorite people together."
Jongin crinkles his nose. He doesn't think accompanying his boyfriend to the airport would be such a grand idea, especially if those rumors about Lu Han and that boy, Sehun was it?, almost being an item before he transferred were true. Nevertheless, he agrees to skip school for the day to drive Lu Han to the airport.
It's so damn hard saying no to that face, he thinks as Lu Han blinks at him with wide, shining eyes.
None of Lu Han's boyfriends (now ex-boyfriends) in the past year, not Wu Fan, not Kyungsoo, not even Yixing, had been able to fill the hole Sehun left; but Jongin has come close.
Jongin has a secret. One only his family knows. One he cannot tell Lu Han, innocent, safe, normal Lu Han.
He's crazy. Or, rather, Jongin was crazy, insane, deranged. Now he's fine.
No longer will he wreck the house or harm his own parents in fits of uncontrollable rage.
(He always hurts the people he loves the most, but he vows to never hurt Lu Han.)
Nothing and no one can force him back to SM's Maison for the Mentally Unstable.
Not over his dead body.
So many people. All with places to be, people to meet.
Jongin watches Lu Han, delicate fingers clasping and unclasping, scan the stream of people exiting the terminal gate. He feels his heart squeeze unpleasantly, and he makes no effort to suppress his feelings. He has a right to feel less than okay, even a little bitter, because, for heaven's sake, his boyfriend is waiting to be reunited with boy who may or may not be a rather strong love interest. When Lu Han jumps up with a squeal, Jongin reaches out a hand on reflex, gripping the jubilant boy possessively.
"That's him! That's him!"
Lu Han waves his free hand frantically, calling Sehun's name. A too-thin, brown-haired boy drops his crimson suitcase to the floor in shock; he swivels right and left to find the source of the eager shouts.
"Sehun-ah!"
The boy smiles to himself when he locates the bubbly blonde waiting for him. It's different, after all. Video-chatting with and calling Lu Han always brightens his day without fail, but seeing the boy he loves in person makes him feel practically light-headed with happiness.
Jongin feels an involuntary shiver run up his spine as he finally seeks out Sehun. His eyes narrow because something about Sehun seems almost familiar. He doesn't know why, but he feels the need to tighten his hold on Lu Han.
But it isn't long before Lu Han is pulled from his grasp and into Sehun's embrace.
"Hyung, oh god, I've missed you," Sehun mutters into soft curls. Lu Han breaks into an even wider grin, allowing the other boy's scent to wash over him.
He smells nothing like Jongin, nothing like cinnamon.
Lu Han immediately launches into excited chatter as he leads his friend to the parking lot. Sehun finds himself nearly caught up with all the town gossip by the time he is situated securely in the backseat. He chuckles quietly; he expected nothing less from the golden-haired boy.
When Lu Han pauses for a breath, Jongin cuts in with a wry smile. "Baby, are you gonna introduce us ever or what?"
"Ah! Of course! Sehun, this is Jongin. My..." Lu Han clears his throat nervously, "boyfriend. For four months now. And Jonginnie, you know who this is."
Sehun fights valiantly to control his facial expressions, he really does. But Lu Han catches his flicker of devastation before he can slap on his trademark deadpan look. His heart clenches and suddenly the car feels to small, too musty for him to breathe easily. His head swims and everything fades to gray, to black, to red. Crimson dots his vision for a second before fading away slowly. This feeling is too familiar; Sehun has to ball up his fingers into fists and grit his teeth to keep in control. It's only after a long minute that he realizes that Lu Han is staring at him in alarm and worry from the front seat.
"S-Sehun?"
Jongin glances at him from the rear-view mirror, brows furrowed anxiously. "You alright man?"
He nods quickly, plastering a tight smile on his face. He makes a few excuses about being tired from the flight as he pulls up his hood to hide his face from the two other boys' troubled gazes.
Sehun clenches his fists so tight that his fingernails draw a trickle of crimson blood.
It's awkward but Lu Han is happy, and that's all that matters. Jongin keeps his fingers interlaced tightly with his boyfriend's as they chat with Sehun over cups of warm coffee. Lu Han's manager had insisted that the coffee be on the house, because it's not every day that old friends come back to us.
"So how was studying abroad?"
"Eh, okay. But I don't want to talk about that. Let's talk about you two."
Lu Han freezes at Sehun's lighthearted tone. He's not sure if the latter is genuinely fine with his and Jongin's relationship; the episode on the car had scared him, and made him wonder if maybe bringing his boyfriend along wasn't one of his better ideas.
It's Jongin who leans forward, eyes strange and cold. "Sure thing, what would you like to know?"
"How you two got together? I don't think I recognize you from before I...went abroad."
"I transferred actually," Jongin smiles faintly, "I met Lulu in the dance studio when I joined the school's hip-hop club."
Sehun winces at the mention of Lu Han's pet name. Jongin eyes the boy before him critically; his irises darken to an almost sinister black as he continues on, voice skillfully casual.
"It was- ah, how should I say it. I think it was love at first sight? Lulu was and is the most beautiful person I've ever met," the small smile on Jongin's face stretches into one full of genuine happiness, "I mean, at first, I was attracted to his looks because he's gorgeous, but now I love everything about him. He 's perfect: so kind and smart and...well, don't you think so too?"
Lu Han blushes prettily and attempts to hide his burning face in the folds of his boyfriend's hoodie. Jongin has always been so good to him. Even before they started dating, it was Jongin who bought him tubs of ice cream, watched stupid Disney movies with him, and wiped his tears after each messy break up. His boyfriend helped him remember happiness after Sehun left him behind.
It is in this moment, siting with his two favorite people, that he realizes just how much his lover really means to him; he used to love Sehun (and still cares for him with every fiber of his being) but Jongin is his now.
Sehun, sad eyes observing Lu Han's blissful grin and starry eyes, doesn't reply until moments later.
"Yes, I think so."
Lu Han bids farewell to the two retreating figures. He ties on his work apron with a bursting heart. Oh, everything is just lovely.
He greets the next customer (one large vanilla soy latte, please) with a smile so contagiously bright that even his manager has to suppress a grin.
Jongin's head is spinning and he's seeing red when he finally pulls up to his house after dropping off Sehun. The car ride had been unbearably awkward and tense, to say the least.
And now his backseat smells like apples. He hates apples.
Jongin takes deep breaths in an attempt to calm himself down. He's used to this feeling, this crushing feeling that pulls at the depths of his being and makes his senses tingle. His hands are shaking violently so he slams his car window with all his might, over and over until his fist slips and scrape roughly against a sharp edge. Jongin stares at the red trickling through his closed fist.
That color. It bothers him. It brings back memories. Ones he's been trying to forget for over a year now.
But that color-
He remembers-
Sehun.
His eyes fly open, pupils dilated in fear.
Oh god. No. He won't do anythi-
Jongin shakes even harder now, tremors racking his body.
Calm down, calm down, calm-
He suddenly smiles, almost wryly, at the blood trickling down his arm. For the first time in a year, the feeling courses through his body without restraint.
Lu Han.
He's no longer in control.
Lu Han glances at the clock just as it hits ten. The last of the coffee house's patrons had left ten minutes ago, so he's cleaned up and ready to go. With a last cursory glance around the quaint room...
He closes the coffee shop door and locks up, humming softly to himself. The night air feels cool on his skin; he takes a moment to inhale exhale inhale.
Ah. He's happy.
He follows the dimly lit streetlights down the deserted city block. It's quieter than usual, he realizes, but that's how some Tuesday nights are. Seoul is big and bright and busy, but the coffee shop he works at after school is tucked away in a dusty crevice, surrounded on all sides by towering silver buildings.
His mother would be anxious if she knew how empty the streets were at this time of night, so he shoots her a quick message.
I'll be home in 10. Don't worry.
He doesn't mind the barely illuminated streets. In fact, he likes it. He likes the relative quiet, the pseudo-calm.
And maybe it's this strange sense of peace that dulls his senses and muffles his instincts.
He doesn't notice the shadow skulking behind him, darting into alleys as it tails him. He doesn't hear the faint click of metal hitting metal echo momentarily as bullets slide into place. He doesn't even catch the out-of-place scents of cinnamon and apples (the smell is uncomfortably familiar, yet not entirely) as it rides on breaths of passing winds.
Lu Han is still humming when gloved hands reach out and slam him up against the wall of a dark alley.
It hurts.
A metallic taste fills Lu Han's mouth and the back of his head throbs against the rough brick wall. Stickiness trails down the nape of his neck.
Blood.
He shivers.
"Wh-what do you w-want from me-"
A hand, free of its black glove, emerges from the darkness, pressing almost gently against Lu Han's mouth. It traces his trembling lips before moving to cover his fear-blown eyes. Lu Han screams, but it's cut off when hungry lips meet his. He squirms desperately beneath his attacker's iron hold, all the while attempting to simultaneously bite down on assaulting lips and knee his attacker in the crotch. His unrestrained fright lends him the extra adrenaline he needs; suddenly he is free.
But just as he turns to bolt out of the alley, his eyes make out the dark, crumpled shape of his attacker.
Lu Han freezes.
He knows this person, all too well.
Lu Han knows he should run. Fear is making it hard for him to remain standing, the metallic smell of blood is making him dizzy and every fiber in his body is telling him to get the hell away, right this second.
But the boy before him looks so broken.
Sehun.
Sehun looks so broken.
"Why?" Lu Han breathes out with a quivering breath, one foot already out of the alley. Sehun remains huddled in on himself. When he finally looks up, his eyes are brimming with tears.
With the tear-stained Sehun before him, Lu Han finally sees. It is the contrast that makes him realize that Sehun hasn't seemed human this entire day until now. His eyes were too hard, his speech was too distant, his movements were too stiff. He was too devoid of the happiness that he once made Lu Han feel.
But this human Sehun is even more frightening.
Lu Han turns in blind fear to escape the alley, but a sharp, ominous click stops him in his tracks.
"Look at me."
Lu Han obeys, an icy coldness washing over him. It is still a tearful Sehun before him, but now his best friend holds a silver gun pointed at his heart. The light of the moon glints off the instruments and Lu Han realizes with a start that he can practically see right down the gun's barrel.
Sehun gazes at him with such devastatingly sad eyes that he almost forgets the mortal situation he's in. But his terror jerks him back to his senses.
"Let me tell you a story," Sehun begins hoarsely. "I think you'll like this story. It's a sad story. Didn't you used to love sad romance movies?"
Lu Han nods his head in dread.
"Well, you see, there was once this boy. He was painfully shy and he sucked at making friends. But it never mattered because he had one best friend who was always, always there for him. His best friend was amazing, everything he wasn't and could never even hope to be. His best friend was warm and friendly and smart and so beautiful in every way imaginable. He never had to be jealous though because his best friend was his and his only. It was all very lovely really until high school when this boy...when this boy realized that he loved his best friend. He loved him so much, with everything he had. And- and maybe his best friend also felt the same way. Maybe not so much, but a little. Or so this boy thought."
Sehun cocked his head to the side and let out a dry, humorless laugh, hand still gripping the gun, "This boy though, he was, mmm...special. In a not so wonderful way, unfortunately. He was a little, ah, crazy. That's a nice euphemism, isn't it? His parents always knew but they never said anything because no one likes a deranged kid much. This boy kept it under control though because he wanted to be good for his best friend. He wanted his best friend to think he was normal. But once he realized his love, something changed. He couldn't control himself so well anymore; he was driven crazy with desire and want but he was too afraid of hurting his best friend so, guess, guess what he did?"
Lu Han stares at the seemingly hysterical boy and suddenly he tastes salt water on the tip of his tongue. He doesn't want to be crying, but the panic allows for nothing else.
"You wouldn't ever guess it right, so I'll just tell you. He sent himself to a mental asylum, all the way in France. SM's Maison for the Mentally Unstable. Horrible place really, like Hell on Earth, if you will," Sehun pauses, mock thoughtfully, "Wait, wait, you know what's funny? This boy left behind everything so he could protect his best friend but it turns out that a few months, another boy arrives and later becomes his best friend's boyfriend. No, but see, the funny part is this new boy, let's call him Asshole, came from SM's Maison! Asshole was even in the same ward as the hero of our story. They're both fucking deranged! So it's like the boy's best friend just can't get away from the crazies - one leaves and another one comes."
It takes Lu Han a while to realize that he's sunk to the ground in a mess of sobs. He is confused, and then, all too soon, he understands.
Jongin.
Sehun still has the gun trained on Lu Han, but he's laughing too hard to continue right away. He draws in deep breaths to control his hysterics. He wants to, needs to, tell the rest of the story.
"It gets better now but you probably know what happens. Oh! There's actually a surprise, but we'll get to that soon. So...this boy was in France, locked up and miserable, while Asshole was busy seducing his best friend. This boy finally decided that he was okay and could go back, and his doctors, who were really very incompetent and stupid, didn't notice any out-of-line behavior so he was free to go. But, just in case, because he was that scared of hurting the people he loved, he contacted his best friend so they could talk every day and he managed to wait another half year before leaving the asylum."
Lu Han finds that he is out of tears to shed.
Don't continue.
"When this boy finally, finally, finally got back home, he was so happy. When he saw his best friend waiting for him with a smile so beautiful it could out-charm that of an angel's, he was convinced that he had died and gone to heaven. Which is ironic because then his best friend introduced Asshole as the boyfriend, and, for a second, he wished that he really could die and go to heaven, where people can't hurt. But it won't happen. He won't join the angels in Heaven. Ever. Because he sinned."
Sehun pauses in his story. Sehun's blank, frighteningly dark eyes fill Lu Han with such a sense of foreboding that his breath grows even shallower.
"And here's the surprise I told you about: this boy...he committed the greatest sin of them all. He killed. He murdered a man."
Lu Han can't breathe. He wills Sehun not to go on, the plea insistent and obvious in his eyes. Fresh tears spring forth and stream down his pale cheeks.
Please, no.
"You see, Asshole was pretty fucking crazy too right? So he realized a good while later just who this boy was, and where he had come from, and what he was. Asshole was so scared that this boy would hurt his boyfriend. You could tell just how scared he was when he barged into this boy's apartment, ready to take him to the police or somewhere useless. This boy was a little scared too, but not really, because he had a gun and Asshole didn't. He wasn't going to use the gun, honestly, but Asshole was going on and on about how he needs to stay away from his own best friend so-"
"STOP," Lu Han screams in blind panic, "P-please, stop. Please-"
"He shot Asshole. Right through the head. Asshole's fucking dead, and I've got his blood on this gun to prove it."
Sehun leans forward so Lu Han can see the crimson marring the barrel and handle. He's tired from all the talking, but he has enough energy to stand up. He moves closer and lowers his gun so that the gun is pressed lightly to the golden-haired boy's temple.
Lu Han really does look like an angel, he thinks, but not his angel. Never his angel.
The silver metal is cold against his skin, but Lu Han barely registers it. His eyes are swimming with tears and unseeing when he stares up, past the crimson-splattered gun barrel, at Sehun.
No. Not Jongin.
Not his precious Jongin.
Lu Han had only realized his love for the beautiful, beautiful boy this afternoon, but now Jongin's gone forever.
They had run out of time before they had even begun.
Sehun and Lu Han lock gazes, and something passes between them. Something heavy and unspoken. Something bittersweet.
It's no one's fault, what has happened and what is happening and what will happen. It is no one's fault; it is fate's doing. Fate brought these three together, and brought them to this doom.
This is it.
His love is destructive. All those touched by it find happiness, but also tragedy. Lu Han cannot give such selfish love. And yet, he cannot imagine a life without love.
Lu Han's eyes flutter close and his long lashes brush his tear stained cheeks.
BANG.
The hero of the story is all alone now. He sits in the dark with his best friend limp and lifeless in his lap. He runs his fingers through golden locks, and wipes away nearly dried tears.
He frowns.
Do angels cry?
He reaches for his silver gun with a shaky hand. He lays the fragile corpse on the filthy ground and lies down next to it so that they are aligned, side by side.
He presses the silver gun barrel to the side of his head.
Click, for the bullet.
Click, for the safety.
He keeps his eyes trained on dark lashes, cherry lips and soft curls.
Lu Han.
His best friend, but nothing more. An angel, but not his.
BANG.
Lu Han, Sehun and Jongin.
They become something of an urban legend.
Years later, people pass by the blood-splattered alley tucked in a corner of Seoul, whispering of the Crimson Lovers.
Their blood was of the deepest red.
***
(W T F DID I JUST WRITE. This was supposed to be a plotless drabble, I swear. I get carried away when I'm procrastinating on all things acadmics related OTL.)
(I'm sorry I killed them all. D: Don't doubt my love for them ok.)
Pairing: Sehun/Lu Han, Kai/Lu Han
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: ~4000
Disclaimer: I own nothing herein but the plot
Warning: Character death
Summary: Sehun and Jongin are more alike than Lu Han realizes.
He closes the coffee shop door and locks up, humming softly to himself. The night air feels cool on his skin; he takes a moment to inhale exhale inhale.
Ah. He's happy.
He follows the dimly lit streetlights down the deserted city block. It's quieter than usual, he realizes, but that's how some Tuesday nights are. Seoul is big and bright and busy, but the coffee shop he works at after school is tucked away in a dusty crevice, surrounded on all sides by towering silver buildings.
His mother would be anxious if she knew how empty the streets were at this time of night, so he shoots her a quick message.
I'll be home in 10. Don't worry.
He doesn't mind the barely illuminated streets. In fact, he likes it. He likes the relative quiet, the pseudo-calm.
And maybe it's this strange sense of peace that dulls his senses and muffles his instincts.
He doesn't notice the shadow skulking behind him, darting into alleys as it tails him. He doesn't hear the faint click of metal hitting metal echo momentarily as bullets slide into place. He doesn't even catch the out-of-place scents of cinnamon and apples (the smell is uncomfortably familiar, yet not entirely) as it rides on breaths of passing winds.
Lu Han is still humming when gloved hands reach out and slam him up against the rough wall of a dark alley.
Today is a special day, Lu Han wakes up realizing. He runs through his usual morning routine with a lilt to his step that has his mother smiling warmly.
"Sehun's back?"
Lu Han's eyes twinkle when he nods excitedly. Sehun is his best friend and had been for his entire life. Their families have been neighbors since before either of them was born, and their parents are as close as they are.
Lu Han's heart quickens when he recalls that, just a year ago, he and Sehun had almost become something more.
But then Sehun had begun acting strangely, avoiding Lu Han like the proverbial plague and suddenly leaving for a year abroad in France. Lu Han had been horribly confused and painfully heartbroken, the gaping hole left in his life too large for even his slew of new boyfriends to fill in the slightest. But a few months ago, Sehun contacted him and the two have been talking, about anything and everything, every day since.
Today, finally, they would be together once again.
"I want you to come with me, so you can meet him," Lu Han smiles. "My two favorite people together."
Jongin crinkles his nose. He doesn't think accompanying his boyfriend to the airport would be such a grand idea, especially if those rumors about Lu Han and that boy, Sehun was it?, almost being an item before he transferred were true. Nevertheless, he agrees to skip school for the day to drive Lu Han to the airport.
It's so damn hard saying no to that face, he thinks as Lu Han blinks at him with wide, shining eyes.
None of Lu Han's boyfriends (now ex-boyfriends) in the past year, not Wu Fan, not Kyungsoo, not even Yixing, had been able to fill the hole Sehun left; but Jongin has come close.
Jongin has a secret. One only his family knows. One he cannot tell Lu Han, innocent, safe, normal Lu Han.
He's crazy. Or, rather, Jongin was crazy, insane, deranged. Now he's fine.
No longer will he wreck the house or harm his own parents in fits of uncontrollable rage.
(He always hurts the people he loves the most, but he vows to never hurt Lu Han.)
Nothing and no one can force him back to SM's Maison for the Mentally Unstable.
Not over his dead body.
So many people. All with places to be, people to meet.
Jongin watches Lu Han, delicate fingers clasping and unclasping, scan the stream of people exiting the terminal gate. He feels his heart squeeze unpleasantly, and he makes no effort to suppress his feelings. He has a right to feel less than okay, even a little bitter, because, for heaven's sake, his boyfriend is waiting to be reunited with boy who may or may not be a rather strong love interest. When Lu Han jumps up with a squeal, Jongin reaches out a hand on reflex, gripping the jubilant boy possessively.
"That's him! That's him!"
Lu Han waves his free hand frantically, calling Sehun's name. A too-thin, brown-haired boy drops his crimson suitcase to the floor in shock; he swivels right and left to find the source of the eager shouts.
"Sehun-ah!"
The boy smiles to himself when he locates the bubbly blonde waiting for him. It's different, after all. Video-chatting with and calling Lu Han always brightens his day without fail, but seeing the boy he loves in person makes him feel practically light-headed with happiness.
Jongin feels an involuntary shiver run up his spine as he finally seeks out Sehun. His eyes narrow because something about Sehun seems almost familiar. He doesn't know why, but he feels the need to tighten his hold on Lu Han.
But it isn't long before Lu Han is pulled from his grasp and into Sehun's embrace.
"Hyung, oh god, I've missed you," Sehun mutters into soft curls. Lu Han breaks into an even wider grin, allowing the other boy's scent to wash over him.
He smells nothing like Jongin, nothing like cinnamon.
Lu Han immediately launches into excited chatter as he leads his friend to the parking lot. Sehun finds himself nearly caught up with all the town gossip by the time he is situated securely in the backseat. He chuckles quietly; he expected nothing less from the golden-haired boy.
When Lu Han pauses for a breath, Jongin cuts in with a wry smile. "Baby, are you gonna introduce us ever or what?"
"Ah! Of course! Sehun, this is Jongin. My..." Lu Han clears his throat nervously, "boyfriend. For four months now. And Jonginnie, you know who this is."
Sehun fights valiantly to control his facial expressions, he really does. But Lu Han catches his flicker of devastation before he can slap on his trademark deadpan look. His heart clenches and suddenly the car feels to small, too musty for him to breathe easily. His head swims and everything fades to gray, to black, to red. Crimson dots his vision for a second before fading away slowly. This feeling is too familiar; Sehun has to ball up his fingers into fists and grit his teeth to keep in control. It's only after a long minute that he realizes that Lu Han is staring at him in alarm and worry from the front seat.
"S-Sehun?"
Jongin glances at him from the rear-view mirror, brows furrowed anxiously. "You alright man?"
He nods quickly, plastering a tight smile on his face. He makes a few excuses about being tired from the flight as he pulls up his hood to hide his face from the two other boys' troubled gazes.
Sehun clenches his fists so tight that his fingernails draw a trickle of crimson blood.
It's awkward but Lu Han is happy, and that's all that matters. Jongin keeps his fingers interlaced tightly with his boyfriend's as they chat with Sehun over cups of warm coffee. Lu Han's manager had insisted that the coffee be on the house, because it's not every day that old friends come back to us.
"So how was studying abroad?"
"Eh, okay. But I don't want to talk about that. Let's talk about you two."
Lu Han freezes at Sehun's lighthearted tone. He's not sure if the latter is genuinely fine with his and Jongin's relationship; the episode on the car had scared him, and made him wonder if maybe bringing his boyfriend along wasn't one of his better ideas.
It's Jongin who leans forward, eyes strange and cold. "Sure thing, what would you like to know?"
"How you two got together? I don't think I recognize you from before I...went abroad."
"I transferred actually," Jongin smiles faintly, "I met Lulu in the dance studio when I joined the school's hip-hop club."
Sehun winces at the mention of Lu Han's pet name. Jongin eyes the boy before him critically; his irises darken to an almost sinister black as he continues on, voice skillfully casual.
"It was- ah, how should I say it. I think it was love at first sight? Lulu was and is the most beautiful person I've ever met," the small smile on Jongin's face stretches into one full of genuine happiness, "I mean, at first, I was attracted to his looks because he's gorgeous, but now I love everything about him. He 's perfect: so kind and smart and...well, don't you think so too?"
Lu Han blushes prettily and attempts to hide his burning face in the folds of his boyfriend's hoodie. Jongin has always been so good to him. Even before they started dating, it was Jongin who bought him tubs of ice cream, watched stupid Disney movies with him, and wiped his tears after each messy break up. His boyfriend helped him remember happiness after Sehun left him behind.
It is in this moment, siting with his two favorite people, that he realizes just how much his lover really means to him; he used to love Sehun (and still cares for him with every fiber of his being) but Jongin is his now.
Sehun, sad eyes observing Lu Han's blissful grin and starry eyes, doesn't reply until moments later.
"Yes, I think so."
Lu Han bids farewell to the two retreating figures. He ties on his work apron with a bursting heart. Oh, everything is just lovely.
He greets the next customer (one large vanilla soy latte, please) with a smile so contagiously bright that even his manager has to suppress a grin.
Jongin's head is spinning and he's seeing red when he finally pulls up to his house after dropping off Sehun. The car ride had been unbearably awkward and tense, to say the least.
And now his backseat smells like apples. He hates apples.
Jongin takes deep breaths in an attempt to calm himself down. He's used to this feeling, this crushing feeling that pulls at the depths of his being and makes his senses tingle. His hands are shaking violently so he slams his car window with all his might, over and over until his fist slips and scrape roughly against a sharp edge. Jongin stares at the red trickling through his closed fist.
That color. It bothers him. It brings back memories. Ones he's been trying to forget for over a year now.
But that color-
He remembers-
Sehun.
His eyes fly open, pupils dilated in fear.
Oh god. No. He won't do anythi-
Jongin shakes even harder now, tremors racking his body.
Calm down, calm down, calm-
He suddenly smiles, almost wryly, at the blood trickling down his arm. For the first time in a year, the feeling courses through his body without restraint.
Lu Han.
He's no longer in control.
Lu Han glances at the clock just as it hits ten. The last of the coffee house's patrons had left ten minutes ago, so he's cleaned up and ready to go. With a last cursory glance around the quaint room...
He closes the coffee shop door and locks up, humming softly to himself. The night air feels cool on his skin; he takes a moment to inhale exhale inhale.
Ah. He's happy.
He follows the dimly lit streetlights down the deserted city block. It's quieter than usual, he realizes, but that's how some Tuesday nights are. Seoul is big and bright and busy, but the coffee shop he works at after school is tucked away in a dusty crevice, surrounded on all sides by towering silver buildings.
His mother would be anxious if she knew how empty the streets were at this time of night, so he shoots her a quick message.
I'll be home in 10. Don't worry.
He doesn't mind the barely illuminated streets. In fact, he likes it. He likes the relative quiet, the pseudo-calm.
And maybe it's this strange sense of peace that dulls his senses and muffles his instincts.
He doesn't notice the shadow skulking behind him, darting into alleys as it tails him. He doesn't hear the faint click of metal hitting metal echo momentarily as bullets slide into place. He doesn't even catch the out-of-place scents of cinnamon and apples (the smell is uncomfortably familiar, yet not entirely) as it rides on breaths of passing winds.
Lu Han is still humming when gloved hands reach out and slam him up against the wall of a dark alley.
It hurts.
A metallic taste fills Lu Han's mouth and the back of his head throbs against the rough brick wall. Stickiness trails down the nape of his neck.
Blood.
He shivers.
"Wh-what do you w-want from me-"
A hand, free of its black glove, emerges from the darkness, pressing almost gently against Lu Han's mouth. It traces his trembling lips before moving to cover his fear-blown eyes. Lu Han screams, but it's cut off when hungry lips meet his. He squirms desperately beneath his attacker's iron hold, all the while attempting to simultaneously bite down on assaulting lips and knee his attacker in the crotch. His unrestrained fright lends him the extra adrenaline he needs; suddenly he is free.
But just as he turns to bolt out of the alley, his eyes make out the dark, crumpled shape of his attacker.
Lu Han freezes.
He knows this person, all too well.
Lu Han knows he should run. Fear is making it hard for him to remain standing, the metallic smell of blood is making him dizzy and every fiber in his body is telling him to get the hell away, right this second.
But the boy before him looks so broken.
Sehun.
Sehun looks so broken.
"Why?" Lu Han breathes out with a quivering breath, one foot already out of the alley. Sehun remains huddled in on himself. When he finally looks up, his eyes are brimming with tears.
With the tear-stained Sehun before him, Lu Han finally sees. It is the contrast that makes him realize that Sehun hasn't seemed human this entire day until now. His eyes were too hard, his speech was too distant, his movements were too stiff. He was too devoid of the happiness that he once made Lu Han feel.
But this human Sehun is even more frightening.
Lu Han turns in blind fear to escape the alley, but a sharp, ominous click stops him in his tracks.
"Look at me."
Lu Han obeys, an icy coldness washing over him. It is still a tearful Sehun before him, but now his best friend holds a silver gun pointed at his heart. The light of the moon glints off the instruments and Lu Han realizes with a start that he can practically see right down the gun's barrel.
Sehun gazes at him with such devastatingly sad eyes that he almost forgets the mortal situation he's in. But his terror jerks him back to his senses.
"Let me tell you a story," Sehun begins hoarsely. "I think you'll like this story. It's a sad story. Didn't you used to love sad romance movies?"
Lu Han nods his head in dread.
"Well, you see, there was once this boy. He was painfully shy and he sucked at making friends. But it never mattered because he had one best friend who was always, always there for him. His best friend was amazing, everything he wasn't and could never even hope to be. His best friend was warm and friendly and smart and so beautiful in every way imaginable. He never had to be jealous though because his best friend was his and his only. It was all very lovely really until high school when this boy...when this boy realized that he loved his best friend. He loved him so much, with everything he had. And- and maybe his best friend also felt the same way. Maybe not so much, but a little. Or so this boy thought."
Sehun cocked his head to the side and let out a dry, humorless laugh, hand still gripping the gun, "This boy though, he was, mmm...special. In a not so wonderful way, unfortunately. He was a little, ah, crazy. That's a nice euphemism, isn't it? His parents always knew but they never said anything because no one likes a deranged kid much. This boy kept it under control though because he wanted to be good for his best friend. He wanted his best friend to think he was normal. But once he realized his love, something changed. He couldn't control himself so well anymore; he was driven crazy with desire and want but he was too afraid of hurting his best friend so, guess, guess what he did?"
Lu Han stares at the seemingly hysterical boy and suddenly he tastes salt water on the tip of his tongue. He doesn't want to be crying, but the panic allows for nothing else.
"You wouldn't ever guess it right, so I'll just tell you. He sent himself to a mental asylum, all the way in France. SM's Maison for the Mentally Unstable. Horrible place really, like Hell on Earth, if you will," Sehun pauses, mock thoughtfully, "Wait, wait, you know what's funny? This boy left behind everything so he could protect his best friend but it turns out that a few months, another boy arrives and later becomes his best friend's boyfriend. No, but see, the funny part is this new boy, let's call him Asshole, came from SM's Maison! Asshole was even in the same ward as the hero of our story. They're both fucking deranged! So it's like the boy's best friend just can't get away from the crazies - one leaves and another one comes."
It takes Lu Han a while to realize that he's sunk to the ground in a mess of sobs. He is confused, and then, all too soon, he understands.
Jongin.
Sehun still has the gun trained on Lu Han, but he's laughing too hard to continue right away. He draws in deep breaths to control his hysterics. He wants to, needs to, tell the rest of the story.
"It gets better now but you probably know what happens. Oh! There's actually a surprise, but we'll get to that soon. So...this boy was in France, locked up and miserable, while Asshole was busy seducing his best friend. This boy finally decided that he was okay and could go back, and his doctors, who were really very incompetent and stupid, didn't notice any out-of-line behavior so he was free to go. But, just in case, because he was that scared of hurting the people he loved, he contacted his best friend so they could talk every day and he managed to wait another half year before leaving the asylum."
Lu Han finds that he is out of tears to shed.
Don't continue.
"When this boy finally, finally, finally got back home, he was so happy. When he saw his best friend waiting for him with a smile so beautiful it could out-charm that of an angel's, he was convinced that he had died and gone to heaven. Which is ironic because then his best friend introduced Asshole as the boyfriend, and, for a second, he wished that he really could die and go to heaven, where people can't hurt. But it won't happen. He won't join the angels in Heaven. Ever. Because he sinned."
Sehun pauses in his story. Sehun's blank, frighteningly dark eyes fill Lu Han with such a sense of foreboding that his breath grows even shallower.
"And here's the surprise I told you about: this boy...he committed the greatest sin of them all. He killed. He murdered a man."
Lu Han can't breathe. He wills Sehun not to go on, the plea insistent and obvious in his eyes. Fresh tears spring forth and stream down his pale cheeks.
Please, no.
"You see, Asshole was pretty fucking crazy too right? So he realized a good while later just who this boy was, and where he had come from, and what he was. Asshole was so scared that this boy would hurt his boyfriend. You could tell just how scared he was when he barged into this boy's apartment, ready to take him to the police or somewhere useless. This boy was a little scared too, but not really, because he had a gun and Asshole didn't. He wasn't going to use the gun, honestly, but Asshole was going on and on about how he needs to stay away from his own best friend so-"
"STOP," Lu Han screams in blind panic, "P-please, stop. Please-"
"He shot Asshole. Right through the head. Asshole's fucking dead, and I've got his blood on this gun to prove it."
Sehun leans forward so Lu Han can see the crimson marring the barrel and handle. He's tired from all the talking, but he has enough energy to stand up. He moves closer and lowers his gun so that the gun is pressed lightly to the golden-haired boy's temple.
Lu Han really does look like an angel, he thinks, but not his angel. Never his angel.
The silver metal is cold against his skin, but Lu Han barely registers it. His eyes are swimming with tears and unseeing when he stares up, past the crimson-splattered gun barrel, at Sehun.
No. Not Jongin.
Not his precious Jongin.
Lu Han had only realized his love for the beautiful, beautiful boy this afternoon, but now Jongin's gone forever.
They had run out of time before they had even begun.
Sehun and Lu Han lock gazes, and something passes between them. Something heavy and unspoken. Something bittersweet.
It's no one's fault, what has happened and what is happening and what will happen. It is no one's fault; it is fate's doing. Fate brought these three together, and brought them to this doom.
This is it.
His love is destructive. All those touched by it find happiness, but also tragedy. Lu Han cannot give such selfish love. And yet, he cannot imagine a life without love.
Lu Han's eyes flutter close and his long lashes brush his tear stained cheeks.
BANG.
The hero of the story is all alone now. He sits in the dark with his best friend limp and lifeless in his lap. He runs his fingers through golden locks, and wipes away nearly dried tears.
He frowns.
Do angels cry?
He reaches for his silver gun with a shaky hand. He lays the fragile corpse on the filthy ground and lies down next to it so that they are aligned, side by side.
He presses the silver gun barrel to the side of his head.
Click, for the bullet.
Click, for the safety.
He keeps his eyes trained on dark lashes, cherry lips and soft curls.
Lu Han.
His best friend, but nothing more. An angel, but not his.
BANG.
Lu Han, Sehun and Jongin.
They become something of an urban legend.
Years later, people pass by the blood-splattered alley tucked in a corner of Seoul, whispering of the Crimson Lovers.
Their blood was of the deepest red.
***
(W T F DID I JUST WRITE. This was supposed to be a plotless drabble, I swear. I get carried away when I'm procrastinating on all things acadmics related OTL.)
(I'm sorry I killed them all. D: Don't doubt my love for them ok.)