My last twenty-seven.
Другие записи: We'll continue the fight. | Голенький Дима Билан | Для начала | сын.
...I don't know where to go. The life waiting for me there is full of chaos. I'm helpless and I've got no one to depend on. I'll promise to find myself. To tap all the potentials that I have. I'll be better. I bet I will. I can't imagine myself facing all those interviews without someone who can cheer me up when I feel lost, without someone whom I can cry on when I mess up. The journey's mine and not anybody else's. I shouldn't depend on whoever is beside me.
What do I really want in life? I honestly do not know. I used to excel in almost all of the subjects, I actually overlooked the subjects that I enjoy studying. I loved history and at one point I decided to take up history. There was this time when I'm thinking of taking up astronomy abroad. Along with all those is my like to become a teacher--a good one. I really do not have any idea where I want to go. During my second year, I wanted to become a radio DJ and a host. My senior year directed me to become a president or CEO of a company and a part-time singer/performer. I enjoyed doing a lot of things. Too bad that the course that I took in college is research-based and belongs to the liberal arts program. I still want to learn, and I want to excel. But I skipped the part that this is the time to get serious about things--to find work and earn. It's not about discovering who you are, but being practical by making use of what you harvested. I'm not ready yet. I still want to enjoy things as they are. I still want to play the game where I can be the jack-of-all trades. But now's not the right time. I have to choose and commit.
I did a lot of things in college that can make me proud--in academics, in activities, in involvements, and experiences. I learned a lot. The child that I was before became a man when I entered this prestigious university. I failed as a leader. I shifted courses. I quitted organizations. I chose to prioritize. I learned how to love. I had my heart broken. I lost. These defined the man that I am right now. I got the right dreams and paths, the good and nearly perfect ones actually. But I still chose not to pursue them for reasons that I still can't figure out.
I may seem like a fool for not choosing the best choices in life... but who cares? It those choices make me happy, then I don't have any reason of regretting those. I became happy and that's all that matters.
I'll face the real world alone. If I emerge successful, it's a sign that I got stronger and better. I know, I'll be...
This will be the last twenty-seven that I have. For years now, it really has a connect to me. Maybe because it's the combination of 2 and 7--the rival networks; maybe it's because it's the channel of Disney. I don't know. From then on, the number 27 has given me special meaning. I can always attest that twenty-sevens give me memorable smiles. Remarkable events in my life happen during the 27th--In Love, Forever Yours, Carnivale, performance requests, gimmicks, overnights, celebrations, bonding activities, and the like. 27s give magic in me; it's a part of existence. Right now, I'm temporarily letting it go... I'll start from scratch tomorrow. I'll seize this day when I know that this day could have given me enough strength to go on. It actually did the other way around. Today, it allowed me to feel broken. It gave me the wounds that I'm not sure if will heal. It reminded me that this life is actually mine. This life is not about me and my friends. This life is uniquely mine and it's in me whether I would make it a success story or not. 27 will always be one of the best parts of my whole life. It will always be a reminder of good memories. I'll get 27 out of my head and put it inside my pocket...hoping that by the time that I already brought success in my life, I'll let 27 out. This time around, 27 wouldn't just be a date or number that gives me happiness and luck, I'll be the one to share my success and incorporate it to 27. I just hope that on my way to achieving success, the 27 on my pocket won't get lost and be forgotten.