“I’m not you’re baby because we’re not together”

Oct 18, 2010 13:58


Другие записи: Spell BEAUTIFUL. :) | I'm an escapist. | The need for loss. | Е мае




This is not the first time that I said I love you. In fact, I might have said it a thousand times already. But I know, right now, in each time I utter those three words, is a hope for us to happen. I’m half way getting you back, and half way burying myself alive. Whatever your decision maybe, it will definitely make or break me. I’m not ready to be torn apart. Who wants to be broken, if you could have escaped in the first place? I am. Because I know that the pain I’m feeling right now is the person I love most. I’m not even sure if I already felt this before, but this is different. It’s not the way that I used to have. Maybe, I am growing into a more mature relationship. Before, I usually go to the shortcuts. But right now, with this person, I know that I am mature enough to fight for you, to fight for us, no matter what. This time, there’s a chance of losing you, but I still give it a shot. And maybe that’s the essence of love-fighting for the one you love even if the world is against you, even if it’s you that is at risk, even if it seems to be hopeless. If you’re in love, you’re blind to the possibility of breaking into pieces. You oversee the possibility of giving up, because you’re in love. You might get tired from time to time, but you shouldn’t stop because you’re in love.

If your answer is yes. I honestly do not know how to express myself, I would want to shout, to celebrate, to be happy, to be joyful of having you, with the better me, the better us. I will serve you to the best of my ability. I would take care of you day by day. I would endlessly court you. This may be the first time that I’m actually courting someone. I really do not know how. What I keep in mind is that I want you to stay happy, and I want to take good care of you…hoping that you’ll fall again for me. Hoping that the possibility of us again might happen. If you decide not to, maybe, he’s the one who’s going to make you happier. And yet, I still do not know what to do when that happens.

I’m happy with you. I’m happy even if there is pain. I’m happy if you’re happy. I’m waiting for you babe. I’m here. From afar, I’m watching you smile. I’m watching you fall for someone else. I’m happy for you even if it is painful. And maybe, just maybe, that’s what love is all about.
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