ahou! ahou!
You know the sound crows make? It sounds just like the Japanese word for fool.
I was a fool to think that things would work out the way I'd like. I was a fool to ever imagine us happy together a few months down the road. I've always been a fool, and I'm sure that I'll never stop being a fool. I'm easily manipulated and easily swayed. I fall in love too easy for it to be anywhere near healthy. My life has never been easy, but in comparison to other's, its definitely not been hard. Unfortunately, I am weak, and I can't handle the curveballs life throws at me. Smoke keeps filling my lungs, but no longer can I forget my struggles. My head is cloudy and my heart is heavy and in pieces. I have no ambition at this point. I don't want to go to school, I don't want to work.
I'm a fool to keep hoping that one day you'll realize I'm the better person. That you'll fall in love with me and love me unconditionally. And I'll foolishly say yes again, because I'm in love with you like a fool. Ahou! Ahou! So many times when we hung out I just wanted to say, "I love you," and let you know how I feel about you, but I was afraid. Afraid it would scare you off, or something.
Maybe I was a tool in your diabolical plan to get her to fall madly in love with you again and that all the troubles and worries in your lives would magically dissapear. But your plan backfired, didn't it? You can't get what you want, and I can't get what I want. We're both miserable saps in this web of desperation.
You know nothing will be the same between you and her. She can't trust you, she'll always think you'll have hidden motives. You broke her heart, just like you broke mine. Only, you had a history, didn't you? She won't even talk to you right now, and your miserable. And all I want to do is be able to comfort you and tell you I love you and that I'm still here, because I'm a fool. I can't do that though, can I? It's not fair to have such strong feelings for someone who doesn't share the same emotions for you.
I love you. And I wish you loved me back.
P.S. I miss Ellen. Why did she have to leave when I need her comfort now more than ever?
I was a fool to think that things would work out the way I'd like. I was a fool to ever imagine us happy together a few months down the road. I've always been a fool, and I'm sure that I'll never stop being a fool. I'm easily manipulated and easily swayed. I fall in love too easy for it to be anywhere near healthy. My life has never been easy, but in comparison to other's, its definitely not been hard. Unfortunately, I am weak, and I can't handle the curveballs life throws at me. Smoke keeps filling my lungs, but no longer can I forget my struggles. My head is cloudy and my heart is heavy and in pieces. I have no ambition at this point. I don't want to go to school, I don't want to work.
I'm a fool to keep hoping that one day you'll realize I'm the better person. That you'll fall in love with me and love me unconditionally. And I'll foolishly say yes again, because I'm in love with you like a fool. Ahou! Ahou! So many times when we hung out I just wanted to say, "I love you," and let you know how I feel about you, but I was afraid. Afraid it would scare you off, or something.
Maybe I was a tool in your diabolical plan to get her to fall madly in love with you again and that all the troubles and worries in your lives would magically dissapear. But your plan backfired, didn't it? You can't get what you want, and I can't get what I want. We're both miserable saps in this web of desperation.
You know nothing will be the same between you and her. She can't trust you, she'll always think you'll have hidden motives. You broke her heart, just like you broke mine. Only, you had a history, didn't you? She won't even talk to you right now, and your miserable. And all I want to do is be able to comfort you and tell you I love you and that I'm still here, because I'm a fool. I can't do that though, can I? It's not fair to have such strong feelings for someone who doesn't share the same emotions for you.
I love you. And I wish you loved me back.
P.S. I miss Ellen. Why did she have to leave when I need her comfort now more than ever?