death note/ breakfast
Matt stretches his arms over his head, the bones moving back in place. He groans under his breath as the sunlight cuts through the curtains and hurts his eyes. He grins thinking about all the times that Mello has told him that playing too many video games would ruin his eyes. Matt has always answered with a laugh and a whispered “freaking drama queen”.
He swings his legs out of the mattress and gets up ruffling his own hair. He turns around slowly and lets his eyes wander along the line of Mello’s naked back, white skin almost melting with the whiteness of the blankets. Matt holds back from passing a hand through the blond’s hair, golden strands seem to shine scattered on the pillow.
The little albino is not in sight, but it’s always like that, when Matt and Mello get up in the morning Near is never in his right place, between them. Matt knows that Near has always used to get up earlier also when they were still at Wammy’s. the redhead fumbles around looking for his boxers, hidden somewhere under white socks and leather trousers. He silently gets out of the room in his boxers and t-shirt, closing gently the door behind his back, he doesn’t want to face an angry blond first thing in the morning.
There’s the sound of water running in the corridor, Matt imagines Near’s small, soft body immersed in warm water and something stirs up inside of him, the sensation of Near’s and Mello’s skin still printed on his fingertips.
The kitchen is silent and immersed in the morning light, there are still the bowls they have eaten noodles in the night before and the glasses stained with the red wine they had bought at the supermarket because Mello was feeling like drinking wine.
Matt patiently puts the dishes in the sink, he shivers as cold water splashes on the back of his hand. He opens the fridge, his toes curled because of the cold of the tiles. They have decided not to assign a shelf of the fridge to each one of them, so their things are mixed up. Near’s yogurt beside Mello’s chocolate and Matt’s beer cans.
He manages to find a half-full cartoon of orange juice, a couple of apples and a tiny basket of raspberries. He remembers the perfect contrast between the raspberries and Near’s pale, white fingers as he reached out for them when they were at the supermarket. Matt has always had a weak point for Near’s fingers, when the little albino twists his white locks around them, or when he encircles Matt’s length with those soft, elegant fingers.
Matt cuts the apples and puts all the ingredients in the mixer. The sound of it functioning fills his ears as he reaches for the packet of cigarettes that he abandoned the night before, when a very demanding blond just commended him to go upstairs. That’s what Matt has always liked about Mello, the way he could be a perfect little hurricane in disguise.
He takes the first drag of the day and he knows that it is going to be a good day when butterflies spurt in his stomach as the nicotine begins to travel around his body.
He knows that neither Mello nor Near approve of him smoking, but he really doesn’t feel like quitting at the moment. The first time he smoked was with Mello, when they were twelve years old and had hidden in a corner of the courtyard at dinner time. They both had coughed a lot, but while Mello had thrown his cigarette away Matt had taken another drag, and then another more.
He pours the smoothie in the first three clean glasses that he manages to find and then, humming lightly along the notes of The ring of fire by Johnny, he starts to prepare the dough for the pancakes. He usually is the lazy kind of guy, but sometimes he likes to do something nice for Mello and Near when they manage to be all together for some days before Near goes back to the US for work.
Matt really doesn’t know how Mello and Near could feel about this thing that the three of them are sharing, but what he knows is that he has probably lost the game since the very beginning, considering how hard he has fallen for the both of them. First had come Mello, and it had been with him, in some closet back at Wammy’s, that Matt had discovered what making love to someone meant. Then came Near, and at first Matt was curious, just like Mello, about how the little albino would have reacted to them, then, almost without noticing, Matt had grown fond of the little sounds Near made when he and Mello were touching him, of the way his cheeks would turn pink if they would look straight at him for too long.
Often Matt thinks that Mello and Near are like two worlds of which a complete map doesn’t exist, and every time he kisses Mello or sinks inside of Near he feels as if he is discovering something new.
As he pours a bit of dough on the pan he hears the sound of feet shuffling on the floor behind him, but he doesn’t turn. From the smell of soap he knows that it is Near. He uses a fruity shampoo and Matt likes to breathe it in as he kisses bee lines along Near’s soft neck.
- Good morning.
Near’s voice is no longer flat as it used to be when they were kids, and sometimes Matt proudly thinks that it’s thanks to Mello and him that Near isn’t a void, porcelain doll as before.
-‘Morning.
Matt flips smoothly a pancake and drops it in a plate nearby, Near’s gaze follows Matt’s movements silently as he sits at the table, his feet barely touching the floor. He hasn’t grown much over the years, neither Mello has, ‘cause he has remained slim and thin as before. But Matt’s shoulders are broader now, his legs longer, and his hands warmer. Near likes the way Matt touches him, his touches both decisive and gentle. His touches are not nervous as Mello’s, but Near also knows that Mello’s touches are more nervous because Mello is always afraid of breaking him, probably the blond has always been afraid of it, since when there was nothing more than hatred between them. Near sits on a stool, his feet don’t touch the floor and he dangles them lazily. Matt leaves the pan and takes another cigarette.
- Do you want some water?
Near shakes his head, white curls framing his childlike face.
- I’ll wait for Mello.
Matt nods and blows out some smoke.
- Did you sleep well last night?
Matt knows that the question will bring memories back to Near, memories of his and Mello’s hands and lips, and he smiles as he sees that Near’s cheeks are pinker than before.
He turns and focuses on the pancakes again as Near builds up towers of sugar cubes, like L used to do, there’s so much of L in Near, and Matt knows that that’s also one of the reasons why Mello is so attracted by the little albino. He glances at the clock and he knows that Mello will wake up soon, it’s as if he has some kind of clock inside of him which goes of exactly at ten every morning, it’s freaking annoying, ‘cause usually Matt wants to sleep till late, but he has traded the discomfort of it with the pleasure of sharing a bed with Mello. Thinking about it, it has been many years since they started to sleep together, indeed also when they were still at Wammy’s, when they were around fourteen years old they has started to share the same bed at night.
He continues to flip pancakes till he feels a pair of cold hands on his hips, and he knows even without seeing the black nail varnish that it’s Mello, by the way the nails slightly scrape his skin. Without tuning he just pushes his body backwards, this back collides with Mello’s chest, and a soft “uff” escapes the blond’s lips.
-‘Morning Mel.
Matt leans his head back till it is resting on Mello’s shoulder and gently nibbles at his neck. Mello smiles down at him before brushing their lips together. Matt goes back to the pancakes and flips the last one as Mello passes a hand through his hair and sits in front of Near.
-I bet you got up ages before us, uh?
Near looks at him, he tries to smile, he has not smiled much in his life but the more he shares moments like this with the two of them the more he wants to learn. Mello slides is hand over the white surface of the table and rests it over Near’s smaller one.
Matt smiles at the sights as he puts three plates filled with pancakes and the three smoothies on the table.
-They say three it’s a magic number right?
He chuckles at his own joke as he sits down and stabs the first pancake, Mello tries to glare at him but ends up laughing instead. Near continues to eat, but feels warmer at the sound of their laughs.
Even after they’ve finished eating they sit there, all together, Matt smoking a cigarette and Mello recalling pranks that they did back at Wammy’s, Near listens, builds sugar towers and tires smiles some more. When it’s time for him to go to the airport and the drives rings at the door Matt helps him to carry the luggage downstairs. Near stands in the hall, in front of them, and shuffles his feet over the fitted carpet.
-Fuck, I hate goodbyes.
Mello’s voice echoes against the walls and Matt stifles a laugh. Mello takes a step towards Near and leans down, pressing a kiss to the little albino’s lips, licking gently at his lower lip till he opens his mouth and their tongues briefly caress each other. Then, when Mello pulls back, Matt pulls Near into a tight hug before kissing him, a simple gentle kiss. Near knows that he’ll come back in a month but he anyways feels as if he is living something precious behind, Mello ruffles his hair and it’s as if the blond could read his mind.
-You’ll be back soon, don’t worry.
Near leans into the touch of Mello’s hand before smiling again and then turns and heads towards the car. He knows that the warmth which he is feeling, which he feels every time the waves of their life entwine will keep him safe till he comes back to them again.