I Noticed This The Other Day...

[c_rza]

So I was watching Spider-Man the other day, and as it was coming to the end I noticed something in the funeral scene between Mary Jane Watson and Peter Parker. Something I wanted. Something I that think things needed to be like. Something that I thought things would've been like. Well, it was the fact that Mary Jane comes to the realization that she has always loved Peter and that he has always been there for her. He's always been behind her in everything that she does, been there to provide her with any support that she may have needed, been there to give her all the love he has. He never had to say how much he loved her but you saw it in his actions and in his face. But as she came to the realization that she has always loved Peter, he could not return her love. "With great power comes great responsibility." That was his reason for him not being able to love her. In turn, she was crushed and her heart was broken. But ya know fucking what, Mary Jane Watson??? You're too late. He loved you for such a long fucking time and, which by the way, he still does, but you just took a lil too goddam long to realize that shit didn't you? Everyday of his life, all he wanted to do was tell you how much he loved you, but couldn't because you were too associated with some of his friends and plus, he was just a lil too shy. Well, he can't help that. That is why he made his love visible through action and not words. But yea, you were too blind to see that because you thought you were doing what was best for you. Stupid girl. Now you're hurting because you now know that you looked for love in all the wrong places and the one place it was pure, you couldn't get it from.

Now some of you may ask what's the point of my rambling, and it's only cuz I feel I may not find anyone right for me. And it sucks because I have taken that road too many damn times. I'm so tired of feeling the way I feel about someone and being pushed and pulled around, and the second I let my guard down and let my feelings come through, I get shitted on. It's some bullshit that's what it is. And I'm just tired of it happening. I'm at such a loss...And a big part of me wants to say "Fuck every girl I've ever had feelings for..." But...I can't. My heart isn't ready to be like that...