It's as if you know me better than I am.
Ben came home last night. After crying with one another on the phone for far too long, his sister Amy came to take Ella back to her place for the night. I was too broken to be able to take care of her properly, and she didn't need to see me in the mess I was in.
I convinced him to just get off of the phone with me and come over. I sat on our front porch watching for his car, wishing I was the kind of person who smoked, to help ease the anxiety and pass the time. When I saw his car turn the corner I got up and went back inside to wait on the sofa. I didn't want him to know I'd been watching for him.
When I heard the door open, I immediately lost it. I just started sobbing and then I heard his voice ring out calling for me. I managed to get out the words of where I was and he came in and just pulled me into his lap and we both cried for a good hour.
Once we regained ourselves, I went into the kitchen to put on some water for tea. He followed me and sat himself down on one of the barstools and we began to talk. We talked in that kitchen for hours upon hours, him sitting at the barstool and myself perched up on the countertop, leaning against the wall. There were many tears, many rings of laughter, a lot of reminiscing, heartache, pain and comfort. We both love each other very much and this situation is just tearing us both apart, for different reasons.
No conclusion was reached. No answer was found. No solution was met. We just talked. Finally he headed up to bed in the late morning hours and I sat on our deck just looking into oblivion while I replayed the night over again in my head. At some point in the afternoon I went up the stairs and fell into bed beside him.
I just woke up an hour or so ago and he was gone. I'm not sure where he's went off to, and I do hope he will be back.
I convinced him to just get off of the phone with me and come over. I sat on our front porch watching for his car, wishing I was the kind of person who smoked, to help ease the anxiety and pass the time. When I saw his car turn the corner I got up and went back inside to wait on the sofa. I didn't want him to know I'd been watching for him.
When I heard the door open, I immediately lost it. I just started sobbing and then I heard his voice ring out calling for me. I managed to get out the words of where I was and he came in and just pulled me into his lap and we both cried for a good hour.
Once we regained ourselves, I went into the kitchen to put on some water for tea. He followed me and sat himself down on one of the barstools and we began to talk. We talked in that kitchen for hours upon hours, him sitting at the barstool and myself perched up on the countertop, leaning against the wall. There were many tears, many rings of laughter, a lot of reminiscing, heartache, pain and comfort. We both love each other very much and this situation is just tearing us both apart, for different reasons.
No conclusion was reached. No answer was found. No solution was met. We just talked. Finally he headed up to bed in the late morning hours and I sat on our deck just looking into oblivion while I replayed the night over again in my head. At some point in the afternoon I went up the stairs and fell into bed beside him.
I just woke up an hour or so ago and he was gone. I'm not sure where he's went off to, and I do hope he will be back.