Uncle John and STS strike back
Well, today was a good day. As to the last entry, don't ask me what the point of it was...because there was a point, I just forgot.
Yesterday I went to the dentist, once again frustrated by the guy not taking my fucking braces off, my next appointment I get my lower braces off, wow big deal, oh well, it's something...half of the metal disappears, it is something I guess. This Monday I go to Mr. Optometrist (if I spelled it wrong don't fault me for having the intellect of George Bush) to check out contacts, I assume since at that appointment I think I will be putting in contacts to see how I react to them I will be getting them either then or shortly after, so I won't have glasses anymore pretty soon...I mean I'll wear them occasionally but it will be nice to get rid of them. Ah the changes. Who knows, next time I get my hair cut I am going to ask about highlights to see and make sure I wouldn't look like total crap since I am the last person on earth who hasn't colored their hair in some way.
Oh well, what did I do today, oh that's right, work. Yes, believe it or not I have a job over the summer, which I didn't expect to happen until next summer but apparently everyone else is always busy doing something else so instead of sitting around I decided to work a couple days a week. I never realized what a soap opera the bakery is. I thought it was funny, seeing stupid sitcoms and then the bakery is like one too. People who aren't even scheduled to work just show up and hang out and bullshit. People get in fights, like today two people were subtly bitching at each other since one of the workers never shows up so the one who never shows up was making fun of the other for not showing up on Monday because she got lost coming home from Tennessee. People I've never even met say "Hi Buzzy" to me and I'm like "wtf mate, I don't know your name". Oh well, compared to other summer jobs I actually work hard I think. David is a little kok blaster and is working at the WM skank I mean community pool. He sits down for 7 hours a day, holy fucking shit. Chris Creveling sits at the Tam O'Shanter driving range and waits on one customer every 10 minutes. Whatever, my parents are starting to make me pay for some of my own stuff now, so I need the cash.
After that I came home and I don't remember, oh yeah, I went to eat with a few friends and then I went to the driving range and then to Sheetz.
Now, let me compose myself for this story, because it's quite possibly a story of the dumbest person on earth. Ok, now since my sister is a bitch, I put 5 bucks of gas in the car 2 days ago, you know, because she never puts any of her own money in for gas. I get in the car today and see that it's on the E mark, in fact, below it. My sister probably drove 50 miles that night, god knows why. Today I put in 3, because Mainer is a generous person and gave me the 3 bucks for gas money. Three dollars...that's probably the lowest amount I've ever put in my tank ever, I always used to fill it up but if I did my sister would just drive it back to the E mark on my money, so fuck it. Now, I pump my meager 3 dollars worth of gas and go in to pay. I walk in and see that there is only one register working. I get in line thinking I will be out of there in 20 seconds flat because there is just one person in front of me. I was wrong. A woman of short stature, I'd say she was 5' 1'' and she had jeans on that obviously couldn't fit her length wise but she wore them anyway. Her hair had the same fake look of Donald Trump's hair. I didn't catch the first 20 seconds of conversation, thinking it wasn't a big deal but apparently it was a big deal to her that her favorite cigarettes were no longer sold. She started making conversation with the clerk for literally 3 or 4 minutes on cigarettes and then she goes "oh by the way, pump number 8". I looked at the display on the screen...the lady pumped .87 gallons of gas...she pumped 1 dollar and 43 fucking cents worth of gas. Who does that? The possibilities of why on God's green earth she would buy 1.43 cents worth of has flew through my mind and I eliminated all of them in my head and I almost exploded. It felt like I was strapped to a chair listening to "all your base are belong to us" on repeat for about 5,402,340,744 times. Her total came to 4.78....the insanity didn't end there, just when I thought I was home free, I didn't see her whip out a 5 dollar bill. No, it couldn't be that easy. She whipped out her checkbook instead. I thought to myself "she must have just made a mistake" and I expected her to go back into her purse. No. She instead proceeded to open the checkbook and started filling out a check for $4.78. This of course brought me to the point of meltdown. She took perhaps 2 minutes to fill out this check while she continued bitching to the lady about cancer sticks. Perhaps she needed those cigarettes, because if you buy $1.43 worth of gas, bitch about cigarettes, and then write out a check for an extremely small amount of money then maybe she deserved lung cancer. After she paid with her shitty check she turned around, she smelled of dead rabbits and piss, she obviously had a dirty kid mustache. I was horrified, in fact paralyzed with shock. She moved so slowly to the door that I had time to recover, pay the fucking 3 dollars, and get to the door at the same time as her. I managed to restrain myself from drop kicking her ass onto 18. Now, if your head hasn't imploded from the stupidity of this story, stay tuned for another update from yours truly. Oh and by the way, I watched the Matrix Revolutions again today.
Later
Yesterday I went to the dentist, once again frustrated by the guy not taking my fucking braces off, my next appointment I get my lower braces off, wow big deal, oh well, it's something...half of the metal disappears, it is something I guess. This Monday I go to Mr. Optometrist (if I spelled it wrong don't fault me for having the intellect of George Bush) to check out contacts, I assume since at that appointment I think I will be putting in contacts to see how I react to them I will be getting them either then or shortly after, so I won't have glasses anymore pretty soon...I mean I'll wear them occasionally but it will be nice to get rid of them. Ah the changes. Who knows, next time I get my hair cut I am going to ask about highlights to see and make sure I wouldn't look like total crap since I am the last person on earth who hasn't colored their hair in some way.
Oh well, what did I do today, oh that's right, work. Yes, believe it or not I have a job over the summer, which I didn't expect to happen until next summer but apparently everyone else is always busy doing something else so instead of sitting around I decided to work a couple days a week. I never realized what a soap opera the bakery is. I thought it was funny, seeing stupid sitcoms and then the bakery is like one too. People who aren't even scheduled to work just show up and hang out and bullshit. People get in fights, like today two people were subtly bitching at each other since one of the workers never shows up so the one who never shows up was making fun of the other for not showing up on Monday because she got lost coming home from Tennessee. People I've never even met say "Hi Buzzy" to me and I'm like "wtf mate, I don't know your name". Oh well, compared to other summer jobs I actually work hard I think. David is a little kok blaster and is working at the WM skank I mean community pool. He sits down for 7 hours a day, holy fucking shit. Chris Creveling sits at the Tam O'Shanter driving range and waits on one customer every 10 minutes. Whatever, my parents are starting to make me pay for some of my own stuff now, so I need the cash.
After that I came home and I don't remember, oh yeah, I went to eat with a few friends and then I went to the driving range and then to Sheetz.
Now, let me compose myself for this story, because it's quite possibly a story of the dumbest person on earth. Ok, now since my sister is a bitch, I put 5 bucks of gas in the car 2 days ago, you know, because she never puts any of her own money in for gas. I get in the car today and see that it's on the E mark, in fact, below it. My sister probably drove 50 miles that night, god knows why. Today I put in 3, because Mainer is a generous person and gave me the 3 bucks for gas money. Three dollars...that's probably the lowest amount I've ever put in my tank ever, I always used to fill it up but if I did my sister would just drive it back to the E mark on my money, so fuck it. Now, I pump my meager 3 dollars worth of gas and go in to pay. I walk in and see that there is only one register working. I get in line thinking I will be out of there in 20 seconds flat because there is just one person in front of me. I was wrong. A woman of short stature, I'd say she was 5' 1'' and she had jeans on that obviously couldn't fit her length wise but she wore them anyway. Her hair had the same fake look of Donald Trump's hair. I didn't catch the first 20 seconds of conversation, thinking it wasn't a big deal but apparently it was a big deal to her that her favorite cigarettes were no longer sold. She started making conversation with the clerk for literally 3 or 4 minutes on cigarettes and then she goes "oh by the way, pump number 8". I looked at the display on the screen...the lady pumped .87 gallons of gas...she pumped 1 dollar and 43 fucking cents worth of gas. Who does that? The possibilities of why on God's green earth she would buy 1.43 cents worth of has flew through my mind and I eliminated all of them in my head and I almost exploded. It felt like I was strapped to a chair listening to "all your base are belong to us" on repeat for about 5,402,340,744 times. Her total came to 4.78....the insanity didn't end there, just when I thought I was home free, I didn't see her whip out a 5 dollar bill. No, it couldn't be that easy. She whipped out her checkbook instead. I thought to myself "she must have just made a mistake" and I expected her to go back into her purse. No. She instead proceeded to open the checkbook and started filling out a check for $4.78. This of course brought me to the point of meltdown. She took perhaps 2 minutes to fill out this check while she continued bitching to the lady about cancer sticks. Perhaps she needed those cigarettes, because if you buy $1.43 worth of gas, bitch about cigarettes, and then write out a check for an extremely small amount of money then maybe she deserved lung cancer. After she paid with her shitty check she turned around, she smelled of dead rabbits and piss, she obviously had a dirty kid mustache. I was horrified, in fact paralyzed with shock. She moved so slowly to the door that I had time to recover, pay the fucking 3 dollars, and get to the door at the same time as her. I managed to restrain myself from drop kicking her ass onto 18. Now, if your head hasn't imploded from the stupidity of this story, stay tuned for another update from yours truly. Oh and by the way, I watched the Matrix Revolutions again today.
Later