Teenage Poets: Why They Do It and What to Do About It
Although writing poetry isn't "abnormal" in the sense that one out of ten teenagers does it, it is a disturbing and potentially harmful behavior that parents and educators must discourage from the very first episode. If a teenager writes poetry, remain calm and think about what the teenager experienced just before the incident. Understanding why teenagers write poetry can help you deter this aggressive behavior and teach them positive ways to handle their feelings.
Teenagers may write poetry for different reasons, and not all will respond to the same types of intervention. Identifying the kind of poet you're dealing with will help you develop an appropriate discipline technique.
__________________________________________________________
1. The experimental poet.
A teenager may write an experimental poem about a mother's breast or a caregiver's shoulder. When this occurs, adults should use prompt, clear signals to communicate that teenagers must not write poetry about people. "No," said sharply, would be an appropriate response. These experimental poets may simply want to describe, characterize, and vivify other people in order to learn more about their world. Their minds are developing, and they need to experiment. Provide them with a variety of essay topics to write on and a colorful selection of prose to stimulate them during this stage of exploration. This type of poet may also be motivated by teenage pain. Offer teenagers appropriate things to chew on for relief: frozen bagels, very cold, large carrots, biscuits, or a cigar.
2. The frustrated poet.
Some poets lack the skills to cope with situations such as the desire for an adult's attention or another teenager's library. Even though the teenager may not have intended to harm another person, adults must react with disapproval. First, tend to the victim immediately. Then explain to the poet that writing poetry hurts others and is not allowed -- the caregiver's job is to keep all teenagers safe. You may help frustrated teenagers by teaching them appropriate language to show their feelings or get what they need. Give positive reinforcement when children communicate effectively. Also, watch for signs of rising frustration. Spotting potential conflict may help you intercept a potentially harmful incident.
3. The threatened poet.
Some teenagers, feeling they are endangered, write poetry in self-defense. They may be overwhelmed by their surroundings, and write poetry as a means of regaining control. In this case, use the intervention techniques already mentioned, and assure the teenager that his rights and possessions are safe. Teenagers may become threatened by situations such as newly separated parents, the death of a grandparent, or a mother returning to the work force. The threatened poet may require additional nurturing, particularly if the danger is along the lines of physical violence at home or in the immediate neighborhood. In any case, the bond between teenager and caregiver should be as warm and reassuring as possible.
4. The power poet.
Some teenagers experience a strong need for autonomy and control. As soon as they see the response they get from writing poetry, the behavior is strongly reinforced. Give the poet choices throughout the day and reinforce positive social behavior (like sharing and saying thanks). If the poet gets attention when she is not writing poetry, she will not have to resort to aggressive behavior to feel a sense of personal power.
__________________________________________________________
Never hit or "write back at" a teenager for writing poetry. This communicates that poetry is an appropriate way to handle emotion. The approach should be calm and educational. A teenager should not experience any reward for writing poetry-- not even the "reward" of negative attention.
Parents and caregivers must cooperate to prevent teenagers from writing poetry. If teenagers are permitted to demonstrate such behavior at home, there will be no chance of eliminating it in the center, program, or high school. Working as a team, educators and parents may identify possible reasons for a teenager's writing poetry and respond accordingly. While teenager behavioral professionals may be more familiar with positive discipline techniques, parents are experts on their own teenager's behavior.
Take the time to look for patterns in the poet's environment and emotional state at each episode. Does the teenager always write about the same individual? Is the poet simply exhausted, or hungry? Be ready to intervene immediately, but carefully. Teaching teenagers age-appropriate ways to control themselves encourages the development of confidence and self-esteem. We can guide teenagers towards self-control and away from writing poetry. The key is understanding -- for adults and teenagers alike.
Teenagers may write poetry for different reasons, and not all will respond to the same types of intervention. Identifying the kind of poet you're dealing with will help you develop an appropriate discipline technique.
__________________________________________________________
1. The experimental poet.
A teenager may write an experimental poem about a mother's breast or a caregiver's shoulder. When this occurs, adults should use prompt, clear signals to communicate that teenagers must not write poetry about people. "No," said sharply, would be an appropriate response. These experimental poets may simply want to describe, characterize, and vivify other people in order to learn more about their world. Their minds are developing, and they need to experiment. Provide them with a variety of essay topics to write on and a colorful selection of prose to stimulate them during this stage of exploration. This type of poet may also be motivated by teenage pain. Offer teenagers appropriate things to chew on for relief: frozen bagels, very cold, large carrots, biscuits, or a cigar.
2. The frustrated poet.
Some poets lack the skills to cope with situations such as the desire for an adult's attention or another teenager's library. Even though the teenager may not have intended to harm another person, adults must react with disapproval. First, tend to the victim immediately. Then explain to the poet that writing poetry hurts others and is not allowed -- the caregiver's job is to keep all teenagers safe. You may help frustrated teenagers by teaching them appropriate language to show their feelings or get what they need. Give positive reinforcement when children communicate effectively. Also, watch for signs of rising frustration. Spotting potential conflict may help you intercept a potentially harmful incident.
3. The threatened poet.
Some teenagers, feeling they are endangered, write poetry in self-defense. They may be overwhelmed by their surroundings, and write poetry as a means of regaining control. In this case, use the intervention techniques already mentioned, and assure the teenager that his rights and possessions are safe. Teenagers may become threatened by situations such as newly separated parents, the death of a grandparent, or a mother returning to the work force. The threatened poet may require additional nurturing, particularly if the danger is along the lines of physical violence at home or in the immediate neighborhood. In any case, the bond between teenager and caregiver should be as warm and reassuring as possible.
4. The power poet.
Some teenagers experience a strong need for autonomy and control. As soon as they see the response they get from writing poetry, the behavior is strongly reinforced. Give the poet choices throughout the day and reinforce positive social behavior (like sharing and saying thanks). If the poet gets attention when she is not writing poetry, she will not have to resort to aggressive behavior to feel a sense of personal power.
__________________________________________________________
Never hit or "write back at" a teenager for writing poetry. This communicates that poetry is an appropriate way to handle emotion. The approach should be calm and educational. A teenager should not experience any reward for writing poetry-- not even the "reward" of negative attention.
Parents and caregivers must cooperate to prevent teenagers from writing poetry. If teenagers are permitted to demonstrate such behavior at home, there will be no chance of eliminating it in the center, program, or high school. Working as a team, educators and parents may identify possible reasons for a teenager's writing poetry and respond accordingly. While teenager behavioral professionals may be more familiar with positive discipline techniques, parents are experts on their own teenager's behavior.
Take the time to look for patterns in the poet's environment and emotional state at each episode. Does the teenager always write about the same individual? Is the poet simply exhausted, or hungry? Be ready to intervene immediately, but carefully. Teaching teenagers age-appropriate ways to control themselves encourages the development of confidence and self-esteem. We can guide teenagers towards self-control and away from writing poetry. The key is understanding -- for adults and teenagers alike.