(no subject)
i've been staring at this counter time thing for a while. i should be writing a paper, but i've got no motivation. at all.
and it's already 7:30.
i feel very...blah today. i don't know. i guess it's a combination of last night, and today, and well, everyday.
i'm not going to california.
i'm not staying in new jersey.
i'm super annoyed, and extremely irritable, and the one person i want to talk to is busy.
i can't tiptoe around feelings anymore. fuck you.
my ih professor thinks that i am deeper than i appear to people. but i just don't want to dig deeper because it's a scary thing for anyone to do. but the thing is, i have. i just have no desire to do anymore. i know who i am, i just don't let too many other people know it.
marketing is never going to get done. studying is never going to get done. ih notes are not going to get done. i feel ready to give up on this semester. i'll never get the 4.0 i want. i don't even want a 4.0, i want dean's list. 3.5. i can do it, i just need to actually try. i've stopped trying.
i've stopped trying
and it's already 7:30.
i feel very...blah today. i don't know. i guess it's a combination of last night, and today, and well, everyday.
i'm not going to california.
i'm not staying in new jersey.
i'm super annoyed, and extremely irritable, and the one person i want to talk to is busy.
i can't tiptoe around feelings anymore. fuck you.
my ih professor thinks that i am deeper than i appear to people. but i just don't want to dig deeper because it's a scary thing for anyone to do. but the thing is, i have. i just have no desire to do anymore. i know who i am, i just don't let too many other people know it.
marketing is never going to get done. studying is never going to get done. ih notes are not going to get done. i feel ready to give up on this semester. i'll never get the 4.0 i want. i don't even want a 4.0, i want dean's list. 3.5. i can do it, i just need to actually try. i've stopped trying.
i've stopped trying