Dead to the World
Its been so long since i felt this way,
and after what happened i remember why.
I can't deal with the real world, and how things are.
Time takes us all. Makes no difference. Its like a poison,
Killing us slowly and softly as not to be noticed.
Im done. Time will take us, so why am i not just living for today?
A better question,
Why aren't you?
Can't keep dwelling on the past,
The past after all is just the future with the lights on.
Finally supposed to see that things aren't working.
Are you ok?
You're starting to sound pretty low,
Do you feel ok?
I'd hate to see you crash and burn
In the car you're chasing after him.
I know you hate this,
almost as much as me.
You hate the way he makes you feel,
almost as much as me
But you don't wanna let go or fear a waste of time.
You've got an earthquake on your mind,
It's strong enough to bury us alive
By putting all this weight on us forever.
But i made this mess,
I built this fire inside you,
Are you still mine?
Were you ever? Could you be?
Im not alright when i leave.
Cuz baby im all yours, please be all mine.
Its alot to ask.
I can taste it now,
the blood in my mouth and the knife in chest,
I murdered our love that night,
Failed to think things through.
But saboteurs are everywhere and twisting my words, actions, intentions....
Just to fit their little game. But they are nothing more than fucking liars.
Your hiding in your safe place, while they whisper what you want to hear,
directly into the ear you failed to cover.
They have you where they want, your dancing on the ends of strings,
You cling to ever thread that clings to him,
As he sits and plucks his shirt of all the excess string.
But these fucking games and lies arent for me.
im taking off my mask,
im opening up before i cross my heart and hope to die at all,
Im leaving lies to the liars.
People like that don't deserve the things they think they do.
Hurting you everyday just to get themselves by.
The pills go down and get you higher.
They will burn in hell one day.
You're a liar, stop yourself from catching fire.....
you will burn in hell you fucking liar.
Before i could ever let you go, there are so many things ive got to get out.
Id take it all back....id take it all back now.
You mean more to me than youll ever know.
You coulda been my girl and i think its a shame,
That we have to act this way.
I guess these moments fade away.....you may say you never loved me,
But id take it all back just to know you feel the same.
just let me know, im dying inside to know.
Back and forth we go between him and me,
which one is true and which is feigning romantic?
I know i broke your heart, very literally.
This ghost haunts me everyday,
But Im not gonna walk away, or hide my head in shame.
I want you, you don't want me
My mistake then for wasting yours and mine.
I want you but will you stay?
The way you smile is what i can't get out of my mind.
Never gonna let you go i want you all the time,
Gotta prove you can trust me.
Im not ok.
I need you, you don't need me
But would you consider staying anyway?
Your heads full of feeling
Your true love believe......
One more time to say,
I'll love you always and im keeping faith that love finds a way.
I love you to death,
Could you love me to death?
Could you love me?
I want to be the one who calls you baby all the time.
Let me be teh one who never leaves you all alone.
I hold my breath and lose the feeling im all alone.
Now i can't breathe turn my insides out,
And smother me.
Can you smother me?
Behind these bedroom walls,
i sit and think of how things might be.
I think until my thoughts are out of my control.
But they always end the same way,
with you in my arms.
Don't tell me you don't miss these brown eyes.
and that you're not in love.
Its girls like you that keep open doors for guys like me,
that keep themselves locked up for days
Take this stupid heart,
I know its all you want me for, and thats the way it should be.
Just hold it close so everyone knows,
that its all because of you,
that im dead to the world.
There's no where else id rather be that right there by your side.
And when people wonder why im so depressed i tell them because a piece of me in missing.
I have to live with all these things im holding back,
Like all these words that werent enough,
you remind me of a song i used to love.
And every night that i spend, with bloodshot eyes and no end,
Im worrying about you,
so hear i am, with heart scars strayed across my chest.
And im biting bullets and watching phones for no apparent reason.
The sun is beating through the blinds,
I guess i've murdered yet another night.
My eyes are sensative to sight
and my skin burns under the light.
You've kept me in the dark for so long now.
I wish you all the best on figuring all this out,
Sincerity grows in time its true,
But only when sincerity was there to start.
One lie breeds thousands more,
You have to know that im telling you the truth
every lie is the equivalent of another self inflicted scar.
I want so bad to know that you want this,
and i know ive been bad at this till now.
But if youd come back to me there will be no need for doubt.
Not about me, or how much i care.
Ill clear the air, and make you feel like youve always wanted.
Im saving the kiss, that ive been hiding for the time i know it will mean the most.
Im waiting.....for the one thats killed me off to the rest of the world.