messed up in too many ways

[butterflysam]

i'm messed up in too many ways.
i'm selfish, unfriendly, dysfunctional,
i'm losing my human qualities, just gripping onto the last threads of humanity. barely a human i've lost faith in the world.
i've lost faith in people. and sometimes i hate my generation
i'm messed up in too many ways.
i'm hypocritical, i'm idiotic, i'm rude, i'm mean, i'm horrible, i'm messed up in too many ways.
the anger and hate that used to fill me during my times of depression have gone
and now it's just plain sadness.
sadness at my loss of faith, at myself, at humanity.
it seems no one cares anymore.
and yet i realize i write this but i won't try to stop any of it
i'll just let it happen.
that's the last human characteristic I have
the inability to resist.
i'm fading away
into someone thats not me.
something unhuman
but i've come to accept it