Who knows?
I'm at work.. things are steady. So I thought I would update. I thought it might help.
Lately, I don't know.. I've been feeling weird. Like I'm coming unglued.. I feel so displaced and out of whack. I don't know why. I mean I get up in the same bed.. in the same apartment.. with the same boy.. the same animals.. I drive the same car.. to the same job.. I get home and do the same "sobriety" kinds of things. I'm not sure what is going on.. but I feel like I'm about to explode. I'm full of anger and criticism. Nothing feels right. It's so strange. I'm craving some peace and quiet.. especially between my ears. And I'm not sure why this has come about. But I HATE it!! All I can pinpoint is.. It started with Katy popping up, again and has peaked with me finding out that OiBoy signed another year's lease.
I just want to be able to accept situations and people JUST THE WAY THEY ARE -nothing more.. nothing less. I just want to be happy with my life and ME.. just the way it is. I want to be PATIENT with those around me and just love them (or LEAVE them) just the way they are and the place they are "in life". I want to be happy with myself and not let others have so much power in the way I feel. I want to love myself and trust that my life has turned out EXACTLY the way it is supposed to be. I want to stop being so angry and impatient. I want some quiet in my brain. Peace.. happiness.. SERENITY -I'm craving it. Babble, I know. But I had to get it out of my head.
((smile))
Lately, I don't know.. I've been feeling weird. Like I'm coming unglued.. I feel so displaced and out of whack. I don't know why. I mean I get up in the same bed.. in the same apartment.. with the same boy.. the same animals.. I drive the same car.. to the same job.. I get home and do the same "sobriety" kinds of things. I'm not sure what is going on.. but I feel like I'm about to explode. I'm full of anger and criticism. Nothing feels right. It's so strange. I'm craving some peace and quiet.. especially between my ears. And I'm not sure why this has come about. But I HATE it!! All I can pinpoint is.. It started with Katy popping up, again and has peaked with me finding out that OiBoy signed another year's lease.
I just want to be able to accept situations and people JUST THE WAY THEY ARE -nothing more.. nothing less. I just want to be happy with my life and ME.. just the way it is. I want to be PATIENT with those around me and just love them (or LEAVE them) just the way they are and the place they are "in life". I want to be happy with myself and not let others have so much power in the way I feel. I want to love myself and trust that my life has turned out EXACTLY the way it is supposed to be. I want to stop being so angry and impatient. I want some quiet in my brain. Peace.. happiness.. SERENITY -I'm craving it. Babble, I know. But I had to get it out of my head.
((smile))