(no subject)
I haven't updated in like 489132489132489413261328789789456123031263489489132418950354891321 days
I'm tired of being OKAY at everything.
I'm OKAY in school.I'm OKAY at singing.I'm OKAY at writing.I'm just OKAY.
I'm not special at anything.
Ever since i was 4 years old i decided that i want to be musician when i got older...seriously, on my 4th birthday i decided that.And i want to learn to play more instruments, and i feel so lazy not being able to teach myself guitar, but it's just so frustrating not having any guidance, anyone to point out what i'm doing wrong.I feel so lazy not doing it by myself, but i can't help it, thats just the way i am.I wish someone would help me.I used to be really good at piano, but then i stopped taking lessons so now i'm just OKAY.Just OKAY, thats it.I just want something that when people mention it they're like OMG HANNAH IS SO AWESOME AT THAT, something i'm proud of that i can do like no other can. but i dont have that...it blows.
This blah mood i'm in sucks, being alone doesnt help. I'm even so just OKAY average that i'm not special to anyone.I dont have anyone. I don't want a boyfriend or a relationship(cuz we all saw how that one worked out)I want someone that I'm special too, not just average, not just anyone, i'm that someone for them. I want that person that when they call it just puts a smile on your face.When it puts you in a better mood just to hear their voice, or hold their hand, or hug them. Just those simple things brighten your day 10 fold.Someone that gives you that cliche, black-n-white, 50's movie, oogey-gooey warm feeling on the inside just to see them. I want some that i'm special to, and they're special to me. I want a more than average more than someone more than a friend...a special someone.
And to make things better, i think i'm losing my best friend. As of now, none of my friends have really stood out to me. I love her tah death.
I'm tired of being OKAY at everything.
I'm OKAY in school.I'm OKAY at singing.I'm OKAY at writing.I'm just OKAY.
I'm not special at anything.
Ever since i was 4 years old i decided that i want to be musician when i got older...seriously, on my 4th birthday i decided that.And i want to learn to play more instruments, and i feel so lazy not being able to teach myself guitar, but it's just so frustrating not having any guidance, anyone to point out what i'm doing wrong.I feel so lazy not doing it by myself, but i can't help it, thats just the way i am.I wish someone would help me.I used to be really good at piano, but then i stopped taking lessons so now i'm just OKAY.Just OKAY, thats it.I just want something that when people mention it they're like OMG HANNAH IS SO AWESOME AT THAT, something i'm proud of that i can do like no other can. but i dont have that...it blows.
This blah mood i'm in sucks, being alone doesnt help. I'm even so just OKAY average that i'm not special to anyone.I dont have anyone. I don't want a boyfriend or a relationship(cuz we all saw how that one worked out)I want someone that I'm special too, not just average, not just anyone, i'm that someone for them. I want that person that when they call it just puts a smile on your face.When it puts you in a better mood just to hear their voice, or hold their hand, or hug them. Just those simple things brighten your day 10 fold.Someone that gives you that cliche, black-n-white, 50's movie, oogey-gooey warm feeling on the inside just to see them. I want some that i'm special to, and they're special to me. I want a more than average more than someone more than a friend...a special someone.
And to make things better, i think i'm losing my best friend. As of now, none of my friends have really stood out to me. I love her tah death.