a more positive post
I don't like to combine whining with good things. Somehow it just makes the whining less potent, which is not how I feel.
I've been keeping a paper journal, but it's fun to return to the computer and just type as much as I want. I can type so much faster than I can write.
Five good things about this summer so far:
1~) I have figured out the pattern to my migraines. They're no longer several times a week, or even one a week. They're just over one every two to three, and my worst ones are just before That Time of the month. Since moving out of the dorm they've slowed down considerably. The dorm was nasty. I found black mold growing above the window when I cleaned out before leaving. I'm allergic to mold and I sat four feet away from it daily for eight months. I guess environment really does matter.
2~) I HAVE FOUND A MEDICATION THAT WORKS FOR MY MIGRAINES. This is such a huge, enormous, positive fucking relief that I can't even explain it. Having been allergic to most remedies I've tried, I swallowed an Excedrin on Thursday when my migraine presented itself, spent a half hour of misery as the migraine barrelled into full blast, and then all of a sudden the med kicked in and the migraine practically completely stopped.
This is such a miracle I don't - I can't even. I still had a bit of a dull headache but all the other symptoms were gone.
That pill means that I don't have to be completely out on the sidelines when I get a migraine. Yes, my preference during an attack is and always will be to crawl into bed, but if I have to be at work, or I have a test, or I have a show to run, I won't miss it. I can keep working. My life doesn't have to be interrupted because I can't sit up straight, or I can't see.
And it's over the counter, so it's not ridiculously expensive. At this point I would have paid any price. What I do is so important to me.I remember talking with my advisor, Professor George, back in April, about the possibility that I might not be able to call a show due to my migraines, and I just remember bawling my eyes out, not only because I was frustrated and all, but because I was so jealous and angry at the thought of anyone calling that show except me.
Such a relief.
3~) The good weather finally arrived. It's beautiful and sunny and gorgeous and since my nannying job is mostly outside while the girls rotate between tennis lessons/swim lessons/free time, I am going to get TAN. I need to go buy myself a thinner pair of sunglasses. I'm getting huge tan lines that make me look like a reverse raccoon.
4~) Today I wore my first strapless dress and loved it to pieces. I never used to wear these dresses, but I have lost a lot of weight because I am sick, and I'm losing more in a healthy way because I am working out four times a week (three at the gym, biking on Sunday). I bought my first ever dress-that-is-too-small a few weeks ago. I tried it on and it was just too precious. It is dark green-brown with rich chocolately ribbon lining, and a loose skirt that's flowy and logner on the sides than in front and back, with a ruched bodice and a brown flower pinned at the waist. It is ADORABLE and while it looks good on me, it will look so much better once I have lost a few more pounds.
Don't worry, I'm not losing a ridiculous amount I'm completely safe about how much I eat. My migraines demand that I am.
5~) The breeze blowing in the window is soft, smells like summer, and tastes like the sea.
I've been keeping a paper journal, but it's fun to return to the computer and just type as much as I want. I can type so much faster than I can write.
Five good things about this summer so far:
1~) I have figured out the pattern to my migraines. They're no longer several times a week, or even one a week. They're just over one every two to three, and my worst ones are just before That Time of the month. Since moving out of the dorm they've slowed down considerably. The dorm was nasty. I found black mold growing above the window when I cleaned out before leaving. I'm allergic to mold and I sat four feet away from it daily for eight months. I guess environment really does matter.
2~) I HAVE FOUND A MEDICATION THAT WORKS FOR MY MIGRAINES. This is such a huge, enormous, positive fucking relief that I can't even explain it. Having been allergic to most remedies I've tried, I swallowed an Excedrin on Thursday when my migraine presented itself, spent a half hour of misery as the migraine barrelled into full blast, and then all of a sudden the med kicked in and the migraine practically completely stopped.
This is such a miracle I don't - I can't even. I still had a bit of a dull headache but all the other symptoms were gone.
That pill means that I don't have to be completely out on the sidelines when I get a migraine. Yes, my preference during an attack is and always will be to crawl into bed, but if I have to be at work, or I have a test, or I have a show to run, I won't miss it. I can keep working. My life doesn't have to be interrupted because I can't sit up straight, or I can't see.
And it's over the counter, so it's not ridiculously expensive. At this point I would have paid any price. What I do is so important to me.I remember talking with my advisor, Professor George, back in April, about the possibility that I might not be able to call a show due to my migraines, and I just remember bawling my eyes out, not only because I was frustrated and all, but because I was so jealous and angry at the thought of anyone calling that show except me.
Such a relief.
3~) The good weather finally arrived. It's beautiful and sunny and gorgeous and since my nannying job is mostly outside while the girls rotate between tennis lessons/swim lessons/free time, I am going to get TAN. I need to go buy myself a thinner pair of sunglasses. I'm getting huge tan lines that make me look like a reverse raccoon.
4~) Today I wore my first strapless dress and loved it to pieces. I never used to wear these dresses, but I have lost a lot of weight because I am sick, and I'm losing more in a healthy way because I am working out four times a week (three at the gym, biking on Sunday). I bought my first ever dress-that-is-too-small a few weeks ago. I tried it on and it was just too precious. It is dark green-brown with rich chocolately ribbon lining, and a loose skirt that's flowy and logner on the sides than in front and back, with a ruched bodice and a brown flower pinned at the waist. It is ADORABLE and while it looks good on me, it will look so much better once I have lost a few more pounds.
Don't worry, I'm not losing a ridiculous amount I'm completely safe about how much I eat. My migraines demand that I am.
5~) The breeze blowing in the window is soft, smells like summer, and tastes like the sea.