Just thoughts.....
So Levi... My ex of 7 years crushed my soul. I found out I was pregnant 2 days later. Had to send my kids away bc I had to find work and no one to watch them.... First time ever away from me .... Had a tubal ligation in Sept. 2010 after I died when having my daughter.... So shouldn't have been able to get pregnant.... But I bucked up, found a job I loved, and kept my head up... Then I miscarried on my first mother's day without my kids.... Had heard her heartbeat... Saw her move... I laid on my bathroom floor and just bled everywhere.... I'm not entirely sure what got me up off of the floor tbh. About a week later I started making myself have eye contact with myself in the mirror, realizing at that point that I didn't even recognize my own face truly. It was an utterly sad and fucked up realization.... And that's when it clicked... If I couldn't look my own self in the eyes and know fully who I am and love me. How could someone else possibly also love me unconditionally? I just kept focused and continued to work towards knowing me, seeing the recognition of my own soul in my eyes. Have definitely had some hickups between then and now. But it's what I always go back to.