Sorry this is forever long..
alright, here's what I decided...I've been blowing off other people because...well I don't really know why but it has something to do with Dan. And it's not that I'd rather be with him necessarily, because half the time he's over we're just doing homework. I just don't want to make him feel left out of anything? But that has to stop, so I will be rejoining the world of my friends now. And hanging out sometimes. Because I'm tired of sitting around waiting for him to finish up with frat stuff or whatever that half the time I'm not even allowed to know about. I didn't really realize how much that bothered me until someone said something to him and I was like what the heck did that mean and he was like "it's a secret." Relationships are hard enough sometimes without having to add a bunch of secrets and stuff. And time when you have to be gone but I'm not allowed to have a clue what you're doing. Sigh.
It probably sounds stupid...but I'm sure he would feel something similar if he was never allowed to know what was going on with a major part of my life.
::Edit::
I forgot to mention (and this is prolly partially why I've been so upset lately) but, my grandpa is in the hospital again. He was in the hospital when I was home for my cousins wedding, because his knee hurt. For some reason at that time the doctors said they think my grandpa has the beginnings of Alzheimers. Which is really sad. Because I can remember when my grandpa would chime in with interesting facts and stories and stuff...and he started getting quieter and I always said that was sad, but my dad always said it was just cus my grandpa was losing confidence in himself, and cus he was sad that all the people around him were dying...which made sense to me. But now...I can't imagine him ever not remembering me.
But now he's in the hospital again, because he was at therapy for his knee, and he went to the bathroom and never came back. And then when they went to find him he said he didn't have enough strength to get up. That's not my grandpa, my grandpa is strong and everybody likes him.
And my mom only tells me this as an afterthought. I wouldn't have known about the first part if I hadn't been home at the time.
This sucks.
It probably sounds stupid...but I'm sure he would feel something similar if he was never allowed to know what was going on with a major part of my life.
::Edit::
I forgot to mention (and this is prolly partially why I've been so upset lately) but, my grandpa is in the hospital again. He was in the hospital when I was home for my cousins wedding, because his knee hurt. For some reason at that time the doctors said they think my grandpa has the beginnings of Alzheimers. Which is really sad. Because I can remember when my grandpa would chime in with interesting facts and stories and stuff...and he started getting quieter and I always said that was sad, but my dad always said it was just cus my grandpa was losing confidence in himself, and cus he was sad that all the people around him were dying...which made sense to me. But now...I can't imagine him ever not remembering me.
But now he's in the hospital again, because he was at therapy for his knee, and he went to the bathroom and never came back. And then when they went to find him he said he didn't have enough strength to get up. That's not my grandpa, my grandpa is strong and everybody likes him.
And my mom only tells me this as an afterthought. I wouldn't have known about the first part if I hadn't been home at the time.
This sucks.