New Beginnings
I just wanted to give a little update...
I've been doing 110% better. I finally reached my point where I can move on and be over him, and it's bizarre because I can pinpoint it to an exact moment. I came home for Thanksgiving Break, and my sister-in-law, brother, and cousin wanted to drag me out for Thanksgiving Eve. Andy and I had gotten into a tidbit fight that day and I knew they were going to Jack Cassidys - which is Andy's bar I think?- so I was reluctant to go but forced myself to.
Boy oh boy am I glad I went! That was MY night... I had seen people there that I hadn't seen since 5th grade, high school, etc. It was great to see everyone, and great to know that the people I thought never noticed me, remembered not only my face but my name. It's weird how everyone can act like great friends after such a long period of time without seeing one another. In a sense, it made me feel so welcome, so at home, and happy again. And as conceited as it sounds (if it does) - I had guys hitting on me left and right! I didn't pay for one drink that night - I even had girls buying me drinks! Lol. And yes, Andy was there. He stopped by and said hello, blah blah blah. My family wasn't too happy to see him but that's understandable I guess. The rest of the night I kept bumping into him, he was hanging out with a lot of people I was saying hi to. We got a lot of fun pictures and he kept trying to squeeze his way in - like throw his face in last minute or shove his middle finger in there. When I uploaded the pictures I was furious. I'm at the resentful stage with him right now because we were supposed to be "friends" but we never spoke unless I got ahold of him first. So his friend suggested I don't talk to him - let him come to me to see what I meant. Well, I did - we haven't talked since, and this was about a month ago. Not REALLY talked anyway.
But anyway - it made me realize that I can be attractive to other guys. Literally every time I walked across the room I was being checked out, talked to, or meeting up with someone I hadn't seen in a long time. It was just the most fun I've had in such a long, long time. Then I kind of met up with someone there. We've hung out a few times and he made me realize not only can I be attractive to other guys - I can be treated better and with more respect than I had previously been treated. Not that I wasn't respected - but let's face it, the last 6 months things just fell apart.
But after that break - I had the best 2 weeks up at school I've ever had. I got so much closer to what I can call my 4 best friends up there, and each night we all just hung out and genuinely had such a good time. It was so long overdue for me, and I couldn't be more thankful for them and their support.
I dunno, I just wanted to throw in an update (mostly for just Rachel and Dana since they're all who read this!!) Now I'm just home for break and taking every advantage of it, working, and just havign an awesome time with friends and family =D
I've been doing 110% better. I finally reached my point where I can move on and be over him, and it's bizarre because I can pinpoint it to an exact moment. I came home for Thanksgiving Break, and my sister-in-law, brother, and cousin wanted to drag me out for Thanksgiving Eve. Andy and I had gotten into a tidbit fight that day and I knew they were going to Jack Cassidys - which is Andy's bar I think?- so I was reluctant to go but forced myself to.
Boy oh boy am I glad I went! That was MY night... I had seen people there that I hadn't seen since 5th grade, high school, etc. It was great to see everyone, and great to know that the people I thought never noticed me, remembered not only my face but my name. It's weird how everyone can act like great friends after such a long period of time without seeing one another. In a sense, it made me feel so welcome, so at home, and happy again. And as conceited as it sounds (if it does) - I had guys hitting on me left and right! I didn't pay for one drink that night - I even had girls buying me drinks! Lol. And yes, Andy was there. He stopped by and said hello, blah blah blah. My family wasn't too happy to see him but that's understandable I guess. The rest of the night I kept bumping into him, he was hanging out with a lot of people I was saying hi to. We got a lot of fun pictures and he kept trying to squeeze his way in - like throw his face in last minute or shove his middle finger in there. When I uploaded the pictures I was furious. I'm at the resentful stage with him right now because we were supposed to be "friends" but we never spoke unless I got ahold of him first. So his friend suggested I don't talk to him - let him come to me to see what I meant. Well, I did - we haven't talked since, and this was about a month ago. Not REALLY talked anyway.
But anyway - it made me realize that I can be attractive to other guys. Literally every time I walked across the room I was being checked out, talked to, or meeting up with someone I hadn't seen in a long time. It was just the most fun I've had in such a long, long time. Then I kind of met up with someone there. We've hung out a few times and he made me realize not only can I be attractive to other guys - I can be treated better and with more respect than I had previously been treated. Not that I wasn't respected - but let's face it, the last 6 months things just fell apart.
But after that break - I had the best 2 weeks up at school I've ever had. I got so much closer to what I can call my 4 best friends up there, and each night we all just hung out and genuinely had such a good time. It was so long overdue for me, and I couldn't be more thankful for them and their support.
I dunno, I just wanted to throw in an update (mostly for just Rachel and Dana since they're all who read this!!) Now I'm just home for break and taking every advantage of it, working, and just havign an awesome time with friends and family =D